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    theboythatflew

    Ever since i was a small child i remember getting these horrible thoughts to do terrible things that i really did NOT want to do—almost like when you get the urge to jump off a building or bridge when youre standing there looking over the edge. It would make me very uncomfortable while i mentally fought myself about not doing whatever it was i was thinking about until i inevitably got distracted or just forgot. For example my earliest memory of this was when i was in the back seat of my moms car driving down the highway and i was fighting the urge to throw my beloved security blanket out the window. As ive grown up these thoughts have continued: i was at a group meeting for one of my university classes and i was resisting the urge to take my clothes off and start beating everyone up (lol..) or sometimes when im on my computer and my dog—my best friend—is curled up next to me i have the urge to hit him. I would .NEVER. hurt him and would NEVER act out any of these thoughts but its still alarming and uncomfortable to get them and have to mentally struggle with not enacting the actions my brain is proposing...

    I'm sure im not the only person to experience the phenomenon of feeling the totally unwanted urge to jump of a bridge when youre looking out over the edge, so im wondering if anybody has experienced anything similar to what i am describing..
    My uncle is a schizophrenic so that gene must run somewhere close to my family, also i am at the age where this thing usually comes around (23ish) and lately i have been really stressed which i know can definitely act as a catalyst.
    i feel pretty mentally healthy and well put together for the most part besides some stress, so im not terribly concerned about being schizophrenic, but i guess i am concerned enough to post something about it...

    Anything that anybody can contribute or share as incite to this peculiarity would be greatly appreciated.
    thanks!

    posted in Health read more
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    theboythatflew

    I'm sure there have been many male sexual performance anxiety posts before mine so I'll try to keep the generic info brief. Never had a problem with PA, had sex with plenty of girls noooo problem. Got in my first long term relationship which was TOXIC, lasted 5 years, got out and was unable to perform with other women (wtf!!).

    OK. First off. I knoooow its all in my head and i know all i need to do is relax and not think about it blah blah... Unfortunately, I'm an over thinker :P and "not thinking about it" simply will not work for me. I have made SOME progress with this on my own. I am able to sleep with sluts lol. If i dont give a shit about her its not a huge deal; however when it's a good girl and i have even the slightest feelings for her...no dice.
    Im good in bed and happy with my size, PA is just a vicious cycle. Once i couldnt get it up, now i can never get it up type-of-thing. I know myself well enough to know if i sleep with the girl once, the next time when i have nothing to prove, ill be able to perform just fine. Thats where Viagra comes in.

    Ive done some research on the web and most info regarding viagra for performance anxiety is pretty limited and contradictory. Some say Viagra doesnt even effect men who dont have real ED..? Any real info about Viagra for performance anxiety would be veeery appreciated. Also, for my purposes, are there any drugs you would recommend apposed to Viagra, such as Cialis? and what are the differences between them? I know Viagra is purely physical and Cialis is Neurological or something but thats pretty much the extent of my knowledge anything you can tell me in regards to my purposes would be awesome.Ive also heard about Beta blockers for other types of PA, that wouldnt help me for something purely mental like SPA would it (im pretty sure it wont)? also how would you recommend me getting a hold of the stuff? Im 19, and going to the doctor to tell him i dont work isnt very appealing. Any reliable websites etc. where i can get it would be sweet (im in Canada).

    Once again, the whole 'relax' thing doesnt work for me. period. I need something to help me ease in to sleeping with different girls. I KNOW that if i use something to help me get over the pressure of sleeping with someone for the first time i could do just fine without it from then on.
    Whatever info you guys can give me is AWESOME i really would appreciate it.

    this is my very first post btw guys although ive known about the site for a long time. You guys are awesome. thanks for doing what you do so selflessly. especially you Ineligible. :smile:

    posted in Sexuality read more