Concerns

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This is rather strange and embarassing, even over anonymous forums...This isn't just a masterbation problem. more of a problem masterbation has caused.But since i was 12-13 i masterbated, and achieved orgasm not by palming but by grinding against soft fabrics ie my sheets etc. Problem being is i didn't always "Finish" with a full hardon. And as i've grown older i've found i can definitely get rock hard (8 inches) without a problem if i'm horny and properly stimulated, but i can't achieve orgasm.No big deal. but as i've grown sexually acrive i find myself soft even though i'm very stimulated and very horny.A perfect example of this. this past weekend (The very reason i make this post) is i spent the night with a girl after a get together with friends, We made out and had fun and i was rock hard the entire time. about 20 minutes. but as we calmed down, i softened up. she undid my pants and began giving me head. But no matter how incredible it felt i couldn't achieve a full hardon.This is one of many occasions. Other ones include me being hard, but not hard enough to stick it in etc...I guess my question is. Is this normal? and is there anything that can remedy this? I'm refusing to go on pills or anything over this. way to young for that.And PLEASE no childish/rude posts this took alot of courage to do.

Are you on any medications, by chance, or are there any changes in your life that you can remember since it has started to happen?

I don't think it might be all Masturbation. I have the same kinda problem too, albeit not often as when I achieve orgasm, I'm not as hard. It might be using those sheets too.

I haven't been on meds in many many years and even then just for asthma.and i've never masterbated to the point of orgasm in the traditional way.

There's some Web site that seems pretty crazy, which claims that face-down masturbation will screw you up. I'm pretty dubious about what it claims, but why have you never masturbated face-up, or sitting, using your hand? That sounds odd.

I've tried, i could give the whole story, but long story short i was trying to jerk off in bed one night and happened to roll over and tried thrusting my hips, it did the job...At the time i had thought i'd peed myself and it just happened to feel really really good. i've tried on hundreds of occasions to just jerk off and i can't finish.

Your equipment seems to be working. It sounds like a psychological issue.

I guess that "thrusting" makes it happen.

i agree with Steve, sounds like its in ur mind

Now we've figured out it's in my head, any advice?

First, I know how hard it is to admit to these things, and I applaud your courage, Alone I Break.I suspect that you may be having a problem with anxiety - you're nervous, so it doesn't go so well, so next time you worry about that, and it repeats itself . . . it happens a lot. You may have particular problems with anxiety.Since repetition trains your body into the problem, it's important not to keep trying. Stop trying for penetration, but instead concentrate on other things with girls, such as good fingering and oral techniques techniques on them (useful techniques in any case), until, some time in the future, you feel more relaxed and ready. When you do start trying for penetration, can I suggest using the morning rather than at night? At night you are tired, while in the morning your testosterone levels are at their peak.Once you get some good experiences they will help you get more.

As always the advice i recieve here no matter the subject is incredible, promt and makes perfect sense Last question, any advice/tricks to just jerking off normally?

I think that the anxiety issue is correct. Even with your jacking off. You have trained yourself a certain way and when trying something different get worried when it isn't happening.

For masturbation, I would suggest the same recommendation, in that try it in the morning. Also, maybe use something else to distract, like porn, so your mind is doing more than just concentrating on trying to orgasm. Also, lay off other forms of masturbation or sex for 3 or 4 days so that your really horney. Then give it a try. Don't worry so much on the orgasm as concentrating on the whole feel thing. Let the orgasm take care of itself.

Now nearly off topic, but still in the boundry, In reply to: suggest using the morning rather than at night? At night you are tired, while in the morning your testosterone levels are at their peak. It would seem to me atleast that if that is true, then any exercise would be more benificial in the morning then after work in the evening. Do you have any evidence to back that statement up? yours I mean not my own. If Im going to rearrange my sleeping schedule Id like to know Im doing it for a reason instead of jsut a feeling. It makes sense to me but I want some proof a study a something ya know? and as to masturbation, I thought that I can remember from some time back reading some place that the more often you masturbate the more you want to. That sex and masturbation increase certain hormones in your body that bring the desire on more often? That may not be worded right? but I think you may be able to see what Im getting at?

This seems well established, though it would take me a long time to find the original sources. However it is referred to in this paper and this paper and this paper, and articles like this one (scroll down to "Measuring Hormone Levels").The relationship with exercise training I couldn't comment on, but others have; see, for example here and here.

well shit, this is going to alter my sleeping habits a bit after this enlightening bit of info.Thank ya much

i believe it's an anxiety thing.... hard to explain but look in to it.... masterbation should have very little , if nothing at all, to do with it.