My fiance doesn't turn me on!

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I don't understand it becuase he is a really hot guy. I mean he works out and stuff. I look at him and I think he is so hot, but yet he doesn't get me turned on. What would cause that?

For me getting turned on is very little to do with looks, its how they are, how they act etc...........I have been very turned on by people who are not hot, but just have that 'thing' that drives me crazy. I think you are thinking about this too much, can i ask, are you happy in your life? Sometimes lack of sex drive is a symptom of something else, like depression, or stress for example............just wondering.

No I am not very happy. I am looking for a job and bored to death. I do have depression but it is under control with meds. I have felt this way even when I was happy. I love him so much but he just doesn't have that "thing"

are you on Antidepressants?

What meds are you taking? Many antidepressants can have a negative effect on sex drive and/or ability to orgasm.

I am on wellbutrin XL. I have been on it for about 4 years. I can get very turned on from porn and things like that.

Hmmm...that one seems to have fewer bad side effects in that department than the SSRI's (like Paxil) do. And you are still able to get turned on. I guess it must be personal.

Ok so am i right in thinking that you're 21 trying to remember what i have read in posts LOL and you've been with your fiance for 7 years, that would mean you were 14 when you got together? Do i take it you havn't been with anyone else but him? If so do you think your wondering what it would be like with other people, and feel that you're missing out?just random thoughts.........

It seems like the question has developed to, what is in the porn, or whatever else gets your motor running, that turns you on, that he is not offering you.Is it kink?Are you just bored with him?Is sex with him routine and predictable?Does sex, itself, just seem like it's more trouble than it's worth?Are you watching the porn as a way of supplementing your sexual fulfillment or is it a diversion, a way of forgetting and ignoring your problems for a few minutes?Some random questions to ask yourself.....

I don't think you love him. I think you are trying to convince yourself into thinking you do, and that isn't right.I know about the saying "you grow into love", but still there has to be a strong physical attraction to start with...You need to take a break. See other guys. If you don't want to see others, then take a break anyway. I'm thinking a year or so...