I think he's going to break up with me, again. We just got through chatting. He expressed doubt about us, that he's afraid of commitment, bad at relationship, selfish...he was just throwing up all this stuff. It made me mad, but mostly very sad. I just want to try, to not be afraid of pain and be in a relationship. I want to love somebody. I always get so close and something happens and we never become anything thing. I feel the universe is slapping me in the face. I don't want to break up with him, even in all his faults I still like him. I like being around him so much, but lately things have changed (like I mentioned in the beginning of this thread) and I knew he was having these feelings.
I just don't understand why he would want to do this again if he was having doubts. The same issues we talked about today, we talked about last year when we shortly coupled and then broke up. Nothing's changed. I just want him to try, I mean that what couples do when they really want to be together. Maybe he doesn't want to be with me that much.... :frowning:
I know now that I can loved and beloved. I'm not some reject that nobody wants. It's possible for me. I won't die alone.