Yeah it helped a fair amount.thanks. . how did you and that guy meet? i wish a girl would come sooner though...because as the years go by i get more sad and sad that im alone. but thanks for ur advice..helped out.
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Hey all
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We go to the same college... He's a bit of a loner, but we have the same major, so I have classes with him sometimes... I pursued him... There's no way he ever would have pursued me... his childhood was very messed up (no friends AT ALL, suicidal tendancies, divorced parents, REALLY screwed up relationship with his mom, etc)... and it's definitely effected his social life... The one girl he kissed was a girl he met online originally... He's from NY... for HIS 21st birthday, he went down to Tennessee to see her and she blew him off and never showed up. When he called her (while in TN), she basically said she didn't want to see him... needless to say, he had a very shitty birthday... and b/n that and his bad relationship w/ his mom, he has trouble trusting women... He figured he'd end up alone.. die alone.. etc..
It just takes time. I know it sucks to wait.. but it's not the be all and end all... and you want to make sure when you get into a relationship, it's b/c you WANT that person.. not b/c you NEED that person to fill some kind of void... b/c then you're with her for the wrong reasons... I did that my senior year in high school with my first "serious" boyfriend... we both needed each other more than we wanted each other... it filled the void for a little bit, but I realized a few years later that it's a REALLY bad reason to be with someone...
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Okay right now i am really over the edge. i feel so fucken depressed and angry.I was at a party. big party..and i was having a good time. and this girl came along..wow..once in a thousand years..she showed a little interest in me..a little..then my bro see's this...gets jealous..takes her away from me..then at the end of the night is makin out with her.and is now with her...i feel like goin crazy.....you see this is an example of luck i got.....thats why i feel ill be alone forever ..(which i probably will be..alone forever....) Eevery rare time somethin slightly good happens its ripped from me!!! I CANT TAKE TI ANYMORE!!!! i wish i was dead... i know il be alone forever
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actually exclude the i wish i was dead part...i was drunk last night and feelin angry and stuff so. Yeah i feel better after som rest. still sad though...
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Hey there.I'm glad you're feeling a little better. I read your post earlier but I didn't know what to say. Well, hang in there. Things will get better.Good luck, ~ Ivy
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I'm going to say something I've said numerous times, metallica20. Whatever you put into the universe eventually comes back to you.
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Okay..right now i feel really depressed. My friend aint around...and those who are online that i can talk too..wont talk to me right now for some reason. But...im feelin like i want to die. i know girls dont like guys who think like that..but its thier fault..if only they had given me chances...not just girls but a few other things have been gettin me..but i wont get into that....girls is the major thign right now..i just feel like ill be alone forever...and it seems like so...By the way sephiroth.what do u mean...what you put in the universe comes back at ya?
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The problem is, you're looking for someone - anyone - who will throw a glance your way... A girl isn't going to want to be with you if she knows you wanted her just b/c she wanted you and no other reason... A girl isn't going to want to be with a guy who will take whatever he can get.I have several friends my age (early 20's) who have never dated before... some who haven't even really kissed someone yet... Does it suck? Depending on how you look at it, yeah... But I say to you what I've said to them... you can't expect someone else to love you if you don't love yourself first. If you're depressed and putting yourself down all the time and talking about wanting to die, how can you expect someone to come along and fall in love with that??? You need to realize that being in a relationship isn't everything. There's more to you than that... You said the girl problem is the main thing wrong in your life, which means there's probably a lot of good things going on too... look at those... YOU need to be a whole person on your own, by yourself... You shouldn't need someone else to make you happy. Once you realize that, THEN you're ready for a relationship.
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I know..its just..whenever i like a girl. she doesnt want to bother with me..no girls i ever liked, liked me back. I dont just go aftr any girl who looks at me...i aint like that...but whenever i like a girl....no mater what i do or how sweet i be..she only wants to remain friends and such...it makes me sad.Yeah your right...girls dont want to be with a guy who keeps puttin himself down but i put myself down because of the bad luck i been having...i mean...try bein the only guy out of all your friends to never have anyone...or let alone anyone like ya...i just dont want to be alone forever.
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In reply to:
girls dont want to be with a guy who keeps puttin himself down but i put myself down because of the bad luck i been having ...
Sounds like a vicious circle. But when you finally do get with a girl, your confidence will improve, your luck will improve, your life will improve, n'est-ce pas?
I think what people are telling you is valid: you should try to feel good about yourself and be happy with or without a girl or a relationship. But if you can't do that, you can't. Sooner or later you'll meet someone anyway. Everybody does, eventually.
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In reply to: Sooner or later you'll meet someone anyway. Everybody does, eventually. it's true i was really depressed because the one girl that i loved more than the world just "wanted to be friends" and at the moment we havn't spoken for ages so i have lost her altogether despite how much i hated being just friends with her but hey. back to the point trust anyone who says that you will find someone because you will, guarantee it. i know i'm only 16 but it worked for me, i've had relationships ..but they weren't good relationships and i never thought that i would until i found someone else and we ended up going out for ages but she had to move to a different country. but going off the point again lol it will happen, probably when you least expect it.just take care of yourself, keep your head up and just take it as it comes.JaXx
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i dont know..like i said my luck keeps getting worse and worse with no signs of improvment...thats another reasoon im down...instead of up my luck gettin better it keeps going down..makes me wonder if im even meant to love.
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We live together, we act on, and react to, one another; but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves. The martyrs go hand in hand into the arena; they are crucified alone. Embraced, the lovers desperately try to fuse their insulated ecstasies into a single self-transcendence; in vain. By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude. Sensations, feelings, insights, fancies—all these are private and, except through symbols and at second hand, incommunicable. We can pool information about experiences, but never the experiences themselves. From family to nation, every human group is a society of island universes." - Aldous HuxleyUltimately, and undeniably, we are alone in our own heads. So what do you take, if anything, from the above statement? Do you believe that we really are alone in this world and that the only plausible thing to do is understand oursleves? Or do you believe that it is a load of shit and friends and work (etc) will keep your mind sufficiently occupied until your death? A combination?In other words, do you know yourself? Do you believe it is important to know yourself?
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Well, hello!I was just browsing the net on a particularly bad night.I found this forum and I read through it.I really can't believe metallica20's (wicked nick! ) situation and.... I don't know what to feel now... I mean if he is popular AND handsome, and still has such a hard time, then I feel that I really don't stand a chance. I'm beginning to question the little confidence that I had in myself... you know, because I am NEITHER of the above. Seriously, metallica20, I do wish you good luck; keep your chin up,though, because your situation could be much worse (honestly... I believe that I am not fated to find love in this life or the next; YOUR fate needn't be that grim though )+ I read the post ( I can't seem to quote in this forum) about the person who found love at 22 and is happily married now. I truly feel happy for you !
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In reply to: i know i'm only 16 but it worked for me, i've had relationships Wow, I really wish I could relate to what you said...... 16 was a pretty crappy time in my life (needless to say I didn't have and still don't have any real relationships).... I mean, I haven't even been on friendly terms with any member of the opposite sex...(nothing that would count). In reply to: Sooner or later you'll meet someone anyway. Everybody does, eventually. I'm 19 now, but I honestly can't say that I look forward to that happening in the next 10, even 20 years! btw, Thank you for the help, CR125 !
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ur welcome
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Welcome, X_Seijuro_X, and thank you for those very kind words. Indeed I am fortunate.
It's not really necessary to be popular or handsome to get a girlfriend. In fact many guys get them who are remarkably free of both qualities. (Take my brother-in-law.) What matters more is that you accept yourself and keep a positive attitude. Things tend to come when we're looking the other way. If you are desperate for a girlfriend to give your life meaning, it won't happen - girls will detect the desperation and run the other way. But if you are happy with yourself, and don't need one, you'll get one. :smile:
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u know another way to look at the popular or/and handsome thing is, does she like u cuz of u? or cuz she looks good with u?
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Thank you for your replies... and good points from both of you.Well, I do understand that I mustn't come off as being desperate and neither should I appear to not give a damn at all. I mean, on one hand I know I should quit worrying like this and on the other I know that if this is what I want, I have to make a great effort towards that end. I just can't seem to find a balance there. In reply to: you'll get one I surmise that it might be easy to say that when you've actually crossed over to the other side.... but you might remember that life was indeed pretty gray before your patience was rewarded [you found true love].I know it isn't the end of all things... there are other things that are MUCH more important, such as my education and my well-being, but I just feel so lonely sometimes....