Hi, Welcome to my thread. Before I go into any specifics, please refraim from going off topic, or flaming each other, thanks.Well, Well... Where to begin. I am 17 years old, and I am a Junior in high school. Let's go back in time a bit.. sixth grade, I started eating mc donalds a lot, and didnt care about my diet, I was ignorant, not stupid. People became aware of my physical appearance (Obese), and I became a very defensive person, and I started to treat people like shit. I never had any real friends, Wanted attention, and started to get attention by purely making an ass out of myself. It worked, people knew me, but not in a good way. This happened all the way until ninth grade, high school. Ah yes, highschool, the part in your life when you do well in work, make lots of friends, and hopefully get a g/f. Not for me. I had no friends, and became depressed, only for awhile though.Time for my current physical appearance, I am 5'8, 180 lbs. I dress OK, I dont slouch when I walk, I always walk tall, despite my situation. Mainly, I want to share my love and my feelings with someone, particularly a girl. And I know my looks is mainly what is holding me back.'it's your personality that girls look for'My personality sucks too...I will be adding more later, but I am about to go and jog with my buddy, look foward to feedback.
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My Life..... Sucks.
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You dont sound obese to me...180 lbs for a guy ur height seems ok. I think it's not just the physical appearance and defensivness that's keeping the friends and g/fs way - it's the self-esteem issue. A confident and self-assured person is a lot more attractive. If you have low self esteem (which i think you do) then do something about it. You already went jogging so that good! I believe that there is someone for everyone. You just need to let your guard down and open up to ppl. Once you let them know you better, u'll get friends and relationships. The first step is realizing that ur not horrible or bad looking, it's ur negetive attitude that's repeling. Lighten up a little, relax, and get ur self esteem in shape.
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I'm 157 at 5'9-10" and when I look at myself in the mirror, it's not that impressive. Anyway, in my opinion, it has a LOT to do about looks. Say two guys came along to a girl, and the girl had to choose between the two. One guy was tall, good looking, wore nice clothing, and had an ok personality. The other was short, fat, a dork, but his personality was incredible. The girl WILL go for the good looking guy until she got to know him and the other guy, and she MIGHT get with the other guy, but will most likely want to view him as a friend.That 'girls only care about personality' thing is bull.
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Geez, you really attacked girls there! Not all girls are shallow you know! It's true that looks get the girl's attention, but I don't care even if you're Brad Pitt if ur a jerk. Guys are just the same, the good looking girls will get the attention. In the end it'll boil down to your personality no matter how good or bad you look. I've had crushes on guys that were far from gorgeous just cuz they made me laugh and were nice. If you sit there going "I'm so fucking ugly, I hate myself, don't anyone talk to me" then you WILL remain alone. Confidence is SOOO important, i can't stress that enough.
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False anology, Satrin. Nearly all 'fat' people will have a bad personlity:They know they are fatThey feel bad when people look at them, because they know, that the person looking at them, if fat.Instant bad personality
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In reply to:
That 'girls only care about personality' thing is bull.
**Actually that sentence was bull. Thats like saying all guys care about is a nice pair or tits. You can't generalise everyone just because some people feel like that. I have NEVER gone for looks, it really is all about personality, whats the point of having some gorgous hunk if he can't hold a conversation or have fun.............and i totally disagree about the stupid comment about fat people having bad personalities, hell you generalise people too much. The original poster has a bad personality cos he has, not cos hes fat, tho i am sure he will use that excuse............my other half is 19 stone (no idea what that is in pounds - steve help me out LOL) he a big big guy and hes the most amazing man..........
Where was i going with this................oh yeah, not all girls go for looks over personality, and not all fat people are horrible. ** -
In reply to: not all girls go for looks over personality, and not all fat people are horrible. Unfortunately, that is incorrect. While I would like for it to, the new generation of GIRLS these days (13-18), base their first impressions on looks. If im a 'hot' guy that is sitting on a bench by myself, I have a good chance that a girl will try to have a conversation with me, why? she is attracted to me. If I am a fat 400lb person sitting on a bench, that girl would probably just walk away, she is clearly not attracted, for obvious reasons. Physical appearance is definately not ALL they look for, but it's definately a big part in a first impression.You, judging by your picture, look older than a 'girl'. Yes, you dont base much on looks, you are matured, thankfully. However, It's illigal for me to engage in a relationship with women your age, and I prefer to stay within my age group, I cant change the way people my age think, atleast not a specific group of people, girls for example. I can only adapt to the situation, because it is clearly not going to change anytime soon.As far as my personality goes, no, I will not blame it on me being fat. I dont even know my personality, I dont talk to people in my school much, I can tell they don't want to talk to me, for one, they never initiate the convo, and two, they seem uninterested when I do initiate the convo.
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No im not a girl, but i WAS.............and i know how girls think, you don't being a male..............I agree a lot of young people are stupidly concerned with looks over personality, but, that wears off very quickly..............and not all girls no matter what age are shallow.As for other people, well if you have been a nasty person before, you can't expect people to suddenly see the 'new you' and accept you. You will have to work hard to undo that damage you have done, in terms of how people think, but its not impossible. Self-confidence, no matter what you look like is important, you come across as a very articulate person, and probably, giving yourself half a chance, a really nice person. Find who you are, not based on what anyone else thinks, once you know 'you' and like you, other people will too.
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Im a girl thats 17 and 125 lbs. ((not that it matters))Honestly - girls look at guys looks first - its what everyone notices whether theyre willing to admit it or not. But guys look at girls bodies and looks first too - so you saying how girls are shallow is kinda - like the pot calling the kettle black Me...personally-I find myself dating the guy whose not afraid to stand out - not afraid to speak up or out about his opinion - also guys that are hilarious and when were doing nothing- can have the most fun ever out of it. Being different is hot.
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No, I meant that 'girls ONLY care about personality' is bull. There are other factors involved, of course, but more than once has a girl said that she loved my personality, but sees me as a friend and not anything else. Also, I know tons of people a bit overweight that are freaking awesome.
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I agree, I know plenty of people that are over weight but no one really puts them down that I have noticed. However I do know atleast one kid that is similar to you. He is obese and in the past makes himself look like a fool for attention making noises and other annoying things just for attention. Perhaps try to make friends with the not so popular people and as you make more and more friends you will hopefully gradully get friends that are more know/liked.
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You know what? All these people are trying to help you, and you just reject everything! We're telling you the f*cking truth: Personality plays the BIGGER role. So you can just sit at home a sulk about being fat and repel everyone around you, or you can get ur ass to the gym and go out and MEET people, cuz with ur attitude no one will come to you!!
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JenJen, you dont even know my situation.
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So what exactly do you want from us? Support? Help? You turned those down. Pity? Mail order bride?
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i didnt ask for anything :laughing:
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In reply to:
look foward to feedback
then what kind of feed back were u expecting?
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Sorry, was being an ass, I meant i didnt ask for anything, as in speaking... give whatever feedback you want, if you have any.