Ok, my friend is having some serious problems right now. And I didn't think it was going to be that big of a deal but now she's scaring me and I honestly don't know what to do. She broke up with this boy she had been going out with when I told her he's bad news and to leave him alone. But nooo she went out with him anyway. Only to break her heart and ruin her reputation by telling everyone she was obsessed with him and wanted to be his little sex slave which is only half true. She was obsessed but not the other. Now she had gone out with this other guy and I told her once again no you shouldn't go out with him for two good reasons. One, he already has a gf. You can't go out with someone who already has a gf even if they aren't doing anything and the gf doesn't care. It's wrong. And two, she was going waaaaaay too fast with him by letting him touch her in certain places and what not. So the day before yesterday we were talking on the phone and thats when she told me that she was 5% virgin (if that's even possible). So I kept telling her on the phone that he's using her because he already has a gf. And she was all like well his gf doesn't care anyway and she has braces and glasses and they don't do anything. I got so fumed because she was basically trying to say she's unattractive. And I just let it pass and said to her that she needs to tell him to choose now before they go any further than they did. Now yesterday, she calls me on the phone and she's balling and crying and starting an episode on the phone about how he chose his gf over her. Wow. Big surprise. And she said the same thing I told her yesterday about how he was just using her and she couldn't believe she let him do all those things to her. I stayed quiet on the phone the whole time because I couldn't say any comforting words other than "I told you so I told you so." And that wouldn't really help she's my friend. So, I just told her about how she needs to learn not to be so vulnerable and set herself up in situations like that and we hung up. Today she wasn't in church so I went over to her house to see what was up. And her mom said she's in her room locked up and it took me over an hour to get inside finally. When I saw her she was in the corner of her bed crying into her pillow. And it took me another 15 minutes to get her to calm down. So we talked for a while and she was telling me how she can't trust boys anymore and he lied to everyone in school about her saying he never liked her and this and that etc. Well as she was talking to me I noticed her arm was sliced many many times up and down. I grabbed her arm and asked her what happened because I'm thinking to myself oh no he abused her. And she just jerked it away from me and said she had been cutting herself. I think I almost lost my mind then. But even then I didn't know what to say. I was just shocked that her of all people would do this. And she was like "well? what are you gonna say about it?" and I really didn't say anything about it, I didn't know what to say. But I had to get home to clean up and I told her I'd talk to her later. I still don't know what to do about her. I'm really worried about her she's truly changed. I didn't think it was possible for a 14 year old to go through something like this. But it is. I don't get her. I thought she would have learned from her first mistake but she didn't. I don't know how to help her though. I've tried comforting her but all she has to say is how much she hates the male species. I told her I'd pray for her and she cursed me out saying "your d*mn prayers don't do a fing thing". I was like wow ok... just suggesting. So much for being a Christian . I don't want to get on her bad side. And when she's upset or sad that Italian side of her which is vicious sets loose. I know she's upset and I understand. But I'm just trying to help her. And I don't know what to do.
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Why are people so strange?
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Its just guy troubles she will get over it with time. Its just one of those things that upsets you at the time and you slowly get over. Hopefully she wont do anything silly in the meantime.
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Wow.... your friend is messed up. She's not very mature cause she's only 14, but she's throwing herself at guys which is not a good sign. It's like gambeling, you didn't win but the thought of the change that you might win again is so convincing that you just have to try it. She is trying to find a guy in all the wrong ways, sit down with her and talk to her about this. Does her family know about her current situation? And I think the MAIN problem here is cutting. It's a very serious mental disorder and if she doesn't stop SOON, tell her parent and get her some help! As for the guy thing, try to hook her up with a really nice guy that you know to get her mind off of that jerk she was doing some stuff with b4 and she'll get over it pretty quick....wow I didn't answer ur question....people are so strange because of how you define strange, and how the people surrounding you acted , if everone acted like her you wouldn't think it's strange....so blame ur brain for analizing that generalization!!!!!
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If you truly want your friend to get help, then you need to give her more than a little push. You need to call her mom and let her know what's going on. If you're afraid of the problems it will cause your relationship with her you can handle it one of two ways. Suck it up and say I'd rather have you alive and not be my friend. Or pretend to be someone else. Most likely if her mom cares about her at all she'll keep her under lock and key until the girl gets some professional help. As a teenager there isn't much else you can do for her. And it would be a shame if you tried to take on that responsibility.
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It seems that your friend really needs always to have a boyfriend near her (as many other girls) and she can't accept the fact being single and without someone. That's why she couldn't leave her ex-boyfriend and she found after him another one, who surely was not appropriate for her. Of course, everything failed and she felt devastated, alone and injured, even if everything were her fault.Anyway, don't be harsh. She really needs a support from you,instead of just telling her "I told you.". Ask her why she chose these guys and tell her that it's better for her to stay for a long period alone, without any boyfriend, so she can help herself for a bit and she needs to find some time to relax and enjoy her life with her friends. Your friend just needs now you, her close friends, her family and nothing else. Finally, I wouldn't tell her parents exactly about the self-harming issue, but I would warn them that you're afraid of her serious mental situation and I would advise them to take more care of her. But your friend must not find out at any reason that you warned her parents, because you'll lose probably her trust.