all i want is a sweet girl who doesnt mind me being boring as hell, because i am... but im very loving and caring and good at listening but that probably doesnt amount to anything to women... im so tired of being lonely and i feel like ive got nothing to offer cept my feelings and honesty and commitment and faith and bla bla.... but im boring... i also think the fact that im very accepting gives off the vibe that im "settling" with a girl rather than choosing her or that im desperate but that is not the case, i really can see the good in almost everyone... and once i find that someone theres no one in the world who would mean so much to me.... so its not like they arent special and important to me... and once they hurt me i never go back, im not desperate... i just dont know.... is there any hope for me..? im only 16.... do women not mind someone like me so much as they get older? and how old.... cuz right now i cant keep a girlfriend as i am... all of them just get tired of me when they see what im like... i just dont know what to do...
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Im booooring & confused, help me
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What is a normal day like for you?
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The fist thing you have to remember is that you shouldn't lower yourself and your standards just to relate better to a woman. This may sound old and corny but you should wait for someone who likes you for who you are.
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When I was 16 I went thru alot of girls just because i got bored of them and them of me.Too much to see and do and a life waiting around the corner at 16. Your jsut starting to figure out who you are an what it is you like an think you want. Peopel change and at that age they change fastf always in search of a better deal.I wouldnt worry about it too much. peopel settle down and start thinking about who they want at an older age when life is not so big an open full of new things.
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but then I FEEL LIKE THE ONE whos being settled for... like they cant love me when i need them, why should i be miserable until then, then available to them when they need ME..?and i am looking for someone who likes me for me, im looking for someone i actually make happy as is, it just hurts to think that person is non-existant
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Here's some depressing news.
That person IS non-existent.
I'm like you, although 6 years older, and I'm still suffering the same problems.
Girls just don't like me for who I am. I tried dropping my standards to *anyone* and even then I would get dumped within a week for some other guy.This is why I've now totally given up on females and the hope of ever having a female companion. Waste of my time and effort.
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and a normal day for me... just watching TV being lazy in the house i have had big problems with depression and more recently anxiety...in my hometown where i grew up i had lotsa friends, i was outgoing, happy, bla bla... till 5th grade when i moved... alot of crap happened in my life since then.... and when i finally moved back, i felt the pressure of what i thought theyd expect of me... that they'd think ide be different.. which they did... but ive changed alot since then... and all i left them was dissapointment... well more so with myself ide probably just be forgotten to them by now... well anyway, it all just snowballed... i never really was able to really make friends and then i really started to feel like everything in the world was wrong with me then i really started to withdraw from people.... i became depressed, hopeless..... and i have no will to live now other than the possibility that something good might happen... but even that isnt a garuntee and that doesnt really give me the strength and motivation to endure years of pain and lonliness.... just for a chance...? i wasnt suicidal(but a bit depressed) when i had a girl who i thought loved me... told me all this stuff that really changed my life, well turns out it was all lies.... well anyway i just dont know what to do.... i have no will to live without loveive already talked to a friend who would sell me a gun i just need the money... ive been reaching out to so many people recently more than i ever have in hopes that something fortunate may happen before i get it, cuz at that point its over.... im tired of being nothing anyone could love, im tired of never being good enough... i just cant seem to make anyone happy
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this really is a matter of life and death for meplease respond if you read this.... i want to know what you all think...
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Wouldn't you rather wait out and find your solemate? Think of all the woman in the would.. One of them is for you.. you just haven't found her yet. Try to let go of all your insecurities.. there isn't anything wrong with you. Stop looking and it will finally come to you.
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but what if my fate is to be alone, i dont wanna live that life. what if all my waiting will end up in vain..?and i havent always been insecure... i used to have friends and be happy but now nobody wants anything to do with me.. so someone cant say theres nothing wrong with me... i mean suspicion is one thing but when these kinds of things are happening to me what else am i supposed to conclude?
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Your fate is not to be alone. You're 16.. you just havent found the right girl yet.
If you think about it.. People are put on the earth to reproduce.. so you definetly wont be alone
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reproduce with a 'healthy' male or female. why do u think girls like bold/assertive muscly alpha male types? and what about why guys care about looks so much? because you would see that person as a healthy Human and wish to reproduce with them. im just a defective male, an outcast to society, deemed useless.. so what would anyone see in me?
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your only 16 and at an akward phase of your life. just dont give up man and some one will come.
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In reply to: why do u think girls like bold/assertive muscly alpha male types? relax with the action hero movies you'll find the right girl don't worry.
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but youre 14... how do you know.... i want someone who really knows what the deal is cuz ive heard it all before i mean its just cliche at this point.... i feel hopeless but everyone here is helpin me feel a little better.. a little...
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man...you and me can relate, to certain terms anyway, I'm muscular, but when it comes to girls I just flat out don't know what to say, and I'm pretty boring too(at least from my point of view).
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How are you defective???You know something.. I was like you once.. ask people who know me off this site!.. I thought I found a guy.. and I didnt.. he really wasn't worth my time. You just wait! Highschool kids.. full of morons (no ofense to anyone).. wait till you get out into the real world.. then you'll meet real people.
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well i used to be but that was easy, things that were once fun/funny arent anymore because of maturity i guess.... big diff between 8th grade and 11th eh? i used to laugh alot more and have friends but what ive become... after all i know... and all ive seen... i dont know how i could ever go back to being what i was before.... i cant even goto school anymore seeing the people there and just feeling such a rejection makes me not even wanna go... i just wanna be loved how i am.... i wanna make someone happy in such a way... and i hear people in their 20's, young people treat eachother like crap.... someone like me.... whats my motivation to go through all that when love is so important to me? i cant just be alone all that time but i cant keep gettin heartbroken either im trapped... i feel like i know too much for my age...
and im defective cuz im not what women look for in a guy... i aint a leader, not funny, not so talkitive... im practically nothing...? why would anyone love someone like that.... can anyone here honestly say thatd be tolerable? any women? i really doubt it. thats how it is with everyone i meet..
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Hi heresmananame, I'm not a leader, I'm only funny in my own mind, and I'm not at all talkative, but that didn't stop me being stalked by a woman, now my wife.Listen to Helmsman, he put it well. The depressed you at the moment is not the real you. I think you are looking for a girl to lift you out of your depression, but that's a risky way to do it. It's better to seek a way out of your depression first - and it can be done - then go for the girls. It will be much easier then.Part of your depression is that you see yourself as not very good. That's not right. Have you sought any treatment for your depression and anxiety?
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yeah i take zoloft and that alters my mood but not my situation.... thats the harsh reality of it.. tho if it was as bad as it was before i probably wouldnt be writing this now so i guess its helpful in some ways