Hey everybody,I have a serious problem here, it concerns my girlfriend and arousal and such. I feel very strange telling anyone about this, but ive been having problems getting sexualy aroused when im with my girlfriend.Ever since the first day ive went to her house, ive have trouble "getting it up". At first i thought it was a problem of being nervous, but its been 4 months and i still have problems. I have to make excuses to jsut satisfy HER and get her to orgasm.I have true feelnigs towards her and maybe this emotional attraction is clouding my sexual atraction towards her. When i do get horny, it goes away, even if she is giving me a blowjob/handjob. It is so fucknig embarassing and i jsut feel that maybe if i tell somebody, it will take away this haze from my head and allow me to opperate normally. I dont have problems getting a hard-on looking at porn or even other girls, but for some reason when im with her, it jsut wont cooperate. No matter how much i concentrate on it it jsut goes away. And the mroe i think aobut it, the worse it is. And since its not me touching it, i dont even kno if its fully hard when in fact it does come out to play. This has been frustrating me for months and its getting to the point where i am seriously worried and seriously thinking about stealing my friend's father's viagra to make it work. It really beginning to scare me and i kno that sooner or later she is going to say something to me or her firnds and i will be EVEN MORE goddamn embarassed. This is the only problems ive ever had with this girl, and i really do think that my true love towards her is overriding my lust. But i will do anything it takes to make this problem go away as it is seriously eccecting me emotionally.Please only serious replies.-John
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Serious Problem here. Please help!
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It could be, as you say, love overriding lust. Perhaps you think of her, deep down, as too "nice" for sex. It could also be a continuation of nerves, reinforced by your continuing difficulties getting hard. Perhaps it's a combination of both.It may in fact be helpful to get some Viagra or similar (preferably properly prescribed), so you get some practice in sex without that anxiety. Other things that may help are doing it in the morning (when your testosterone levels and horniness are greatest), and anti-anxiety medication (alcohol in moderation can sometimes be useful here).
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I wonder if hypnotherapy would be useful?
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I have the same problem man, or did have...not sure yet actualy but I do know exactly whats your going through. My solution has been to not put myself under any pressure, I dont make plans to use my dick and have decided IU will just wait til I am in a perfectly relaxed and comfortable situation in whcih i can go all the way.You see buddy I wanst getting it up atall cos my girl was wnating sex and I was so dman nervous. I got so fed up i just told her she had to wait a while. So this meant I wanst thinking about sex anymore and thus when i was with her I would get hard, without my thinking about it atall. The trick is to let it all come natural. Explain to your girlfriend you need to slow down.
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I am 16 years old. It jsut frustrating the hell out of me becasue at my age i shouldnt have ANY problems getting it up due to my hormones and all. any further help is appreciated.-John
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Read my post. Age and hormones have shit all to do with it your situation.
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Guys, this problem continues to frustrate me. Any more help in this arena would be great
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I had this with my ex too. I just could not get it up when with her. When she wanted sex, I had to go and look at porn to get it up, and after a long time I did, but as soon as I went back to her it disappeared straight away.I never managed to fix that problem and she gave up trying after a while (not that she ever put any effort in - she wouldn't touch me). I never had sex with her, or any girl.