over silly reasons. For example...I have been depressed ever since yesterday. My friend told me he met this 13 yearold boy who looks jus a girl, an attractive girl. Apparantly this kid think's he's bisexual and is a great kisser.Anyway, I'm now depressed.I get depressed like this all the time. i hear about anyone who is special in some way, or has some kind of success and I suddenly feel so depressed I cant do anything.On the reverse my happiest moments are when I am recieveing some form of compliments...for my work or looks or whatever. I'm good at what I do and thus spend much fo my time at college in a feeling of euphoria. I get the same when I write poetry or when i acted in theatre and when i am generally just centre of attention in a social scene (something I tend to manage pretty well)I just wish I could control the depression. Why should I be jealous of a 13 yearold kid who looks like a girl? Cos he's damned special. The only things I crave are attention and praise and success for success sake (more than money or sex or anything like that) and just being the centre of attention.But I shouldnt get depressed like this! It has made me inactive for weeks on end before. I so need guidance!It doesnt help that nowadays I am unsure about myself and my own specialness. I used to know who I was but for about a year i've been in the most all-consuming idetity crisis imaginable...eveyrhting has changed in so many different ways...where I live, my clothes, my hobbies, the kind iof people I make my firends> I dont know who I am anymore except I demand attention and really do despise any success in those around me unless they fall into a very specific category of people that dont "threaten" me, if ya know what I mean...like 30 something mothers and lesbians.For the moment I want to just not feel depressed while I continue my self-exploration.
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I keep getting depressed
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You are special to me.
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The good news is that you've got quite a lot of good insight into why you're feeling depressed. It sounds like it mostly comes from being unsure of yourself. That's not too uncommon for guys your age. Hell, it happens at my age. One of the most dangerous things we can do to ourselves is to compare ourselves to someone else. I will never be as good looking as George Cloony or as smart as Stephen Hawkins or as good a therapist as Dr. Wulff or...on and on and on. You said you're good at what you do. That's something! You're a good looking kid. That's something else. There's gotta be more there.I too am an approval addict. I know that about myself. Sometimes when I'm not getting that day to day affirmation that I crave so much, and I'm in a healthy place, I start thinking over the past several years and all the stuff I've done that has been good and the impact I've had on people, particularly a group of young men who are now all getting married and starting careers! Who are the people in your life that encourage you? That pour into your life and make you feel "special"? Spend time with those folks as much as you can. At the same time, do you have anyone in your life to encourage/mentor/pour into? That is probably the richest thing you could do for yourself in terms of overcoming depression and feeling good about yourself.You're a good guy. I think you'll be just fine.
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Cheers man, thats all good advice.I spoke to my mum about it and she pointed out that I just dont have much of a life since I moved to this city earlier this year and I just need to get things moving a little more.Cheers
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Yay for mom!Getting things moving is great advice. Just don't put too much pressure on yourself.
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hello, Let me first of all explain what type of depression you have and what it is. Your depression is a healthy depression. Feeling deprest occurs when part of our mind recognises there is a need to change part of ourself. You have articulated the cause of your depression and in my opinion are very sane and emotionaly astute for your age which isnt meant to sound patrionising.You are surficiently developed as an adult to relate feelings of depression to the circumstances that cause them and you have the good grace to be honest about the circumstances and your willingness to share your imperpections with others. I cannot stress in the first instance how mentally healthy just getting that far is, it is in knowing this you will not sink into a depressive disorder if you use this self knowledge to affect change.The deal is we should all at all times value and love ourselves. Now that is not to be mixed up with always feeling good about ourselves. I think you are strong enough to deal with this properly so i am not holding back here.Your feeling of depression are guiding you to recognise a problem that your mind has evolved enough to say it is not useful for me to react in that way anymore. it is bringing to your conscious attention an action or responce to life thats past its sell by date. You have the choice now to recognise that and decide to ajust your responce to the circumstances. Easy for me to say i know. i do recognise this process is not easy, nor is it always a success on first trial, but being in the bussiness of changing ourselves which means periods of not feeling so good, dealing with perhaps anger and grief because chaning an action is often linked to experience and memories is a tough road to travel. yet i urge you this is the path of health. You can only have the exsisting knowledge about yourself (which is quite impressive for your age) by difficult experiences in which you have had to adapt, whether you realise it or not.We live in a world where we are taught we should always feel good, in control and on top of it all, in reality we are not. One defintion of insanity is being so out of touch with ourselves we never feel bad or angry or lost, it is the absence of these qualities in people that are crazy, it is very humane to struggle with these feelings, and that struggle informs you with more self knowledge.If would like me to elaborate or clarify anything ive said here feel free to message me. take care.
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Cheers guys. I appreciate it.