Nice guys vs Jerks

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Pretty much

Then it is their weight for judging, not his.If there were no one around to judge him, then what would he naturally do? In this situation, his actions would speak for themselves. Do you think he would be honest and integral? Or "jerklike"?

heres my philosophy when it comes to women:

imagine two guys, a nice guy who 'respects' women as he would put it greatly and worships them. He's always polite to women, is never rude, always listens intently, and vets every single thought he has for insensitivity, because he's so convinced that the slightest offensive remark will screw up his chances with sleeping with that girl. Of course, its this whole attitude in general which destroys what little hope he has.

Then imagine the 'jerk'. Maybe hes scruffy, drinks/does drugs, and sells drugs for a living. He cheats on his girlfriend a lot but she stays with him. All the nice guys get in a big huff when they see this, and they end up becoming a little misoginystic about this. I used to have this attitude, id see hot girls dating pricks and id think 'women must be stupid if they like getting treated badly'. But the fact is, they dont like getting treated badly. The thing is, you could debate for ages what a women finds attractive, and what she wants, but a lot of women dont even know for themselves. They are constantly changing their idea of what it is they find attractive in a guy. But a 'prick' doesnt try to cater to this ever changing, shapeless idea of the 'ideal guy' that so many women have, he convinces the girl that HE is what they are attracted to. Women dont necessarily KNOW what they want, so he has to TELL them that its him. A nice guy will simply try to be what she wants, and it shows. It always shows.

A prick always gets women effortlessly, because he has found a formula that works and he has stuck with it. He just acts like himself- a prick- and by doing that he gets women. So why would he change anything? If it aint broke, dont fix it. But its not just his prickishness that is found attractive, its everything that goes hand in hand with it. He is relaxed, and confident, because he knows he can just get another girl if this one gets fed up with him, he doesnt have to try. Total and complete confidence. He doesnt make girls his top priority like so many guys do- his top priority could be anything. Even if hes a drug dealer, if his top priority is selling crack to the neighbourhood kids, his girlfriend is way near the bottom of the list, he projects a vibe of 'you're lucky to be with me, not the other way around. If you dont like it, get someone else. No skin off my nose'.

Think about a rock star for a minute.

http://i.realone.com/assets/rn/cms/2004/album_170x170/Myths_keef_170.6556219.jpg

Look at him. He walks into a club, maybe after a concert, and he knows he can have the hottest girl there. It simply isnt an issue. It becomes instinct to him- 'i go somewhere, and all the girls want to fuck me'. Now if he walked into a club like a nice guy all bright eyed and bushy tailed and eagerly listened to everything that every girl had to say, he would probably just end up jacking off alone that night. But no, hes a rock star, hes the shit and he doesnt even need to make conversation with a girl- women are thrown to him. Its as simple as that.

Now i know that might seem like a lot of rambling, but its my credo, and if you think about it it makes a lot of sense. By all means dont become a 'prick'- if you went up to a girl in a bar and called her 'fat' like a real prick would, shed just get upset and walk away. Instead, try and posess the qualities of a rock star- confidence that is achieved by loving yourself completely. Just convince yourself that if a woman doesnt want you, there must be something wrong with her- emitt this quality and you will be suprised how easy things get. With that said, have fun! Gaining this kind of confidence, learning the ins and outs of getting a girl and the like are actually a lot of fun. If you make sleeping with women some kind of daunting task that has to be mastered like ship-in-a-bottle-making then you will probably suck at it.

-africa

100% truth there.I just can't get the balance right because I know for a fact that I'm not "the shit" and nothing seems to be able to convince me otherwise, not even myself.Years of brainwashing there! Don't get yourself into a rut people, else you'll end up like me!

well, look at it this way- some of the most perfect people in the world hate themselves. Supermodels are still convinced that theyre fat and ugly, so many beloved celebrities have problems with self harm and the like- if these people arent convinced of their own greatness, what chance do we have?For me its all about taking the good with the bad when it comes to loving yourself- just as i referred to drug dealers in my earlier post so much, a drug dealer is aware of his own flaws. Any guy who slums around the house all day and doesnt have a real job besides selling narcotics cant deny that he has flaws, and if he does then hes lying to himself. But still, they love themselves. They love themselves because theyre arrogant, self obsessed people. 'So what if i dont have a job? So what if i forget to shower some days and steal car radios and sell coke? Im great. I love me and if you dont like it thats your problem.' Like that. Theres nothing wrong with a bit of arrogance if it helps you to love yourself.

Hey, that was well-put.