I saw this, and couldn't help but share here! I was laughing for...well, I still am at some of em! I also know some of you have seen this, so sorry for the re-run!TESTICULATING. Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks.BLAMESTORMING. Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.SEAGULL MANAGER. A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.ASSMOSIS. The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.SALMON DAY. The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.CUBE FARM. An office filled with cubicles.PRAIRIE DOGGING. When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)SITCOMs. Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business".SINBAD. single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.STRESS PUPPY. A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE . The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.ADMINISPHERE. The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" - needless paperwork and processes.404. Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located.OHNOSECOND. That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake ( e.g. you've hit 'reply all')GOING FOR A McSHIT. Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is known as a McShit with Lies.AEROPLANE BLONDE. One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.AUSSIE KISS. Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.BEER COAT. The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am.BEER COMPASS. The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from.GREYHOUND. A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.MILLENNIUM DOMES. The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.MONKEY BATH. A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go:"Oo!Oo!Oo! Aa!Aa!Aa!".MYSTERY BUS. The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.MYSTERY TAXI. The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your bed instead.PICASSO BUM. A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got four buttocksSALAD DODGER. An excellent phrase for an overweight personSWAMP-DONKEY A deeply unattractive personTART FUEL. Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women
New (ish) words
HAHA, those are funny!
And in that theme, straight from my inbox to here:
Once again, The Washington Post has published the
winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest,
in which readers are asked to supply alternate
meanings for common words.
1\. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2\. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much
weight you have gained.
3\. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever
having a flat stomach.
4\. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5\. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6\. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in
which you absentmindedly answer the door in your
7\. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8\. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9\. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10\. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11\. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12\. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13\. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
14\. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15\. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16\. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
The Washington Post's Style Invitational also
asked readers to take any word from the dictionary,
alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's winners:
1\. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid
people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The
bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.
2\. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
3\. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an
4\. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very,very high.
5\. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
6\. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
7\. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8\. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
9\. Karmageddon (n): its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And
then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10 Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good
11\. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12\. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13\. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
14\. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom
at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15\. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
16\. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and