The perfect mate

---

I thought about this once after watching an Oprah show. I think it would be really great to find a guy that had some of the same traits as the stereotypical woman. I want a guy that isn't afraid to cry or be affectionate and doesn't mind doing housecleaning or cooking. I wouldn't mind a guy that wasn't interested in sports and takes part in child rearing duties. I want a guy that doesn't want to have sex 24/7 and still feels love. I just feel the need to find someone similar to me, but with a penis. Anyone else feel this way? The stereotypical guy seems really unattractive, but a mixture of certain qualities sounds good. Comments?

Few women, and very few young women, would want to date the guy you described. If you're one of the few who would, there seem to be a lot of guys (or at least some guys) complaining that women only want to date macho guys. There must be a way to bring together "feminine" guys, and the women who are attracted to them.

It's hard to find that kind guy. I think if a guy had any of those qualities, he'd be afraid to admit it to his girlfriend. It's a myth that every woman wants the macho guy on the white horse to come and save her and not every man wants a submissve, dependent woman. I think there should be a special dating site or something.

I think you'll be out of luck. Will a gay cover up marriage or a lady with a strap-on surfice?

think there should be a special dating site or something.There is. It's called on-line dating. People can say what they're like and what they want.Maybe your geographical location has some bearing.

I think I know what you're trying to say, but I'm still confused.

It's still hard, at least for me anyway.

HummmmmmI would think that straight men with those kind of qualities are far and few between. I think that most men only show their softer side of themselves to the women in their life or with someone that they can whole heartily trust and feel safe with. Because if it got out to the male population that they cried at movies and were into cuddling and bubble baths, they would be ridiculed by their peers.Just my opinion

I've been with a girl who had a personality just like mine. It was fantastic. The only problem was that we were in different stages in our lives.Though, I feel that I am a well balanced person. I'm not feminine, nor am I overly masculine. I'm more in the middle, a little leaning toward the masculine side. I suppose, the perfect girl for me would not be masculine, nor overly feminine, but still leaning toward the feminine side.

Sounds like the one I managed to catch :grin: (minus the sex bit.. that bit happens to be 24/7 still.. lol not complaining!)

How old are you now? How do you currently go about finding guys? Or do they tend to find you? :smile:

I'm not quite that guy - but I'm close, and I'm getting closer and closer by the minute.

As people have said, guys like that are few and far between, but then so are girls like you.

As Steve said, girls are more after the macho image of guys (in my experience) which I like to hope has something to do with my awful luck with girls!

But I had a revelation yesterday and realised I'm always gonna be happier when I'm single - so yay me :laughing:
I've only met one girl in my lifetime who I think, all things considered, would make a good girlfriend. Normally I just brainwash myself into thinking the others were.

You should definately give online dating a try. I hear it works WAY better for girls than it does for guys.

I am currently 22. I'm trying the online dating thing, but I don't get many responses. Guys hardly ever find me and the ones that do are the wrong ones.It may be easier for women, but I have a hard time transferring things to realife. I've never met anyone in person that I first met online. I'm too nervous.I'm just really lonely and sometimes I feel unattractive because it seems like no one wants me, but I don't want to settle and be unhappy.

I'm just really lonely and sometimes I feel unattractive because it seems like no one wants me, but I don't want to settle and be unhappy.If everyone feels the same way as you do, then everyone feels unattractive and lonely, since no mortal human is worth settling for.The downside of going out on a date is not great, and some of them might actually be fun, even if few of them turn into long-term relationships. Your chance of having a relationship will be pretty close to zero until you put yourself out there. The more you do it, the easier it gets.The funniest thing about dating sites is where people put down what they're looking for. A lot of women are looking for really tall guys, even if they're very short. I don't think they understand about the bell-shaped curve, and how few 6'2" guys they're going to find who they'll like for things other than their height, and who would want to go out with them. It's almost as if people intentionally set themselves up to fail. I think it has to do with fear. Sometimes people fear success more than they fear failure.

I can see what you're saying about setting themselves up to fail.
However surely its better to put what you want rather than having to settle for something you're not really happy with.
All i put in my "what i'm looking for" section is an honest girl.
Only ever had one response and it was from a girl who lived on the opposite side of the country and was 5 years younger than me.
And this is over 3 years. Any girls i tried messaging never replied...so I gave up :smile:
Feeling so much better about myself right now :laughing:

I am actually liking the online stuff. I have had a few really awesome dates. And have made some really good friends.

It is scary to meet someone from online, but it can be done in a safe way. I usually meet in a public place for lunch, or an afternoon round of pool or something. What is the worst thing that can happen if your safe about it? You either rule them in, as a potential or rule them out.

The fear of success is more a fear of change. Change can be uncomfortable, but very gratifying as well.

Looks like I got that guy! Except the sports and sex part!

My guy makes me so happy.. Hes sensitive and cooks and is neater than me!

I think all that matters is to find a guy who suits you.. who you can be happy with.

\> However surely its better to put what you want rather than having to settle for something you're not really happy with.
This is not about you, but sometimes people's wants are virtually impossible to meet. You can draw your own conclusions as to why people sometimes have impossible requirements.
I've yet to meet a perfect person, and that certainly includes the demanding and critical folks.

Sorry I guess I focused too much on how you mentioned height.To me height doesn't seem like an unreasonable search requirement, but I guess you meant along with other factors too.

i think tht yea u may want that now but after a while u will feel otherwise,reason well everyone gose through faces n mayb thats ta face u r in nw but there is no way a woman will want 2 b with a guy like that 4 tha rest of her life no way....its scary if i would say i want a woman jus like me no way its tha different in people that makes u keep comming bac....that makes things intresting.....a man should alway have a backbone n a woman should always feel safe around him.....hey thats jus me....think about it

Height in and of itself may not be an unreasonable requirement, (although it's a matter of taste, unless ballroom dancing is a big part of one's life), but so many women, even women who are quite short, specify an above-average (or far above average) height. It's the same idea as a guy specifying a huge breast size, but more politically acceptable. Since guys usually make the first move, they don't need to make public what they're looking for -- or they don't have to be as openly honest.The height thing is just an arbitrary example. It can be any arbitrary parameter.The point is that it appears that people's tastes sometimes restrict their possibilities in a big way. Do the tastes come from watching TV and movies, where people get the idea that what they're seeing is real, or does it stem from people's fear of actually having a relationship?