Relationship Issues

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Me and my girlfriend have been going out for over a year. We are both 15. My problem is she always has to have another close guy friend.It usually starts out fine but they always start to like her. The first guy im fine with now it was early in the relationship and i was insecure. The second guy is what really started it, first she hung out with him a lot because he was always at her uncles. I wasnt to thrilled but what really got me mad was when he kissed her and I wanted her to stop seeing him then. She still talks to him now. The next guy is her Mom's Boyfriend's son. Once again I was fine with him until I found out that she got high with him. Then after that i found out that he kissed her, and she let him. Thats what she told me, but she says she doesn't remember it happening.It just seems like I cant be the only guy in her life. I know she wouldnt cheat on me. It might just be me. I dont know, but i do need help. So if you have any suggestions on how to fix it. If im being to jealous or overpossesive or something. I just want someone elses point of view. Please help, Thanks.Nick

Same post here

>>>>> thefoshe :hat really got me mad was when he kissed her AND Then after that i found out that he kissed her, and she let him
>>>>> thefoshe:I know she wouldnt cheat on me.

So how do you define cheating?

She sounds like a player, and you let her do it. It is up to you to either put up with how she is, or decide if you need to get out.

I dont know I guess since she doesnt think it happened I didnt think she cheated on me.

So, what makes you think it happened? Is she getting high or drinking?She doesn't THINK it happened...ummm from where I am sitting that is pretty scary.But you talk about this happening with two different guys. One that seems confirmed. EDIT: SRRY! I re read, if she is engaging in behavior that can lead her to do things like kiss and not remember...She is effectivly cheating.

She got high once before, and i told her I didn't like it. Then she did it again. No shes not drinking that I know of. I know it scares me to that she doesnt know. That why i didnt want it happening anymore. Yes one is confirmed. Thats the first guy, I dont know if they acually kissed or he tried and she pushed him away. I'm pretty sure she did push him away.

Do we get to blame the drug? or do we blame the drug user? If someone gets drunk, drives a car,runs someone over, kills them,and cant remember what do we do as a society?The drunk driver is held accountable irrigardless of whether they REMEMBER or not. If there is enough evidence.Please don't blame drugs for bad behavior, blame the drug user. It is one thing to help a user clean up, and forgive, but an entirely different thing to allow them out of their accountability.

Your very right, so do I have a good reason to be mad? Or am I just being overly jealous.

I don't really know what or how she is with the other guy friends. Other than these kissing incidents. (which is enough to put me off and say you have alot of life ahead of you. Lots of years for dating, and you should move on. You have shared your feelings with her, and if she doesn't respect you (doing drugs, and kissing guys) then why put yourself through it? You asked her to lose the other guy, and she STILL stays in contact. Does she have girl friends? Or just guy friends? Does she hang out with the friends whether your there or not? I am NOT opposed to girls and guys being friends, it is mostly how the relationships are handled.EDIT: You have every right to be jelous. But jealousy is just an emotion, what are you going to do about it?

Mostly she has guy friends she hangs out with. The 2nd guy she hung out with was because she went to her uncles all the time and he was there. The 3rd guy is because its her moms b/f's son. It just starts to get annoying when i hear about Johnathon (3rd guy) all the time. Thats how it was with the 2nd guy too. After I knew about the getting high incident I told her to stop getting close to other guys, but that didnt happen.

Well, you have to decide if your willing to put up with this stuff. Your really young, and there are lots of other girls out there. Personally, I would be bailing out of the relationship. It seems to risky emotionally and physically, what if she were to have sex with one of these guys while she was high?

Yea that is true, Its just hard. I think I love her. I know is just teenage fears of why I'm not wanting to break it off. I think itll hurt her and i dont want to do that.

No one LIKES to hurt other people. (ok some sociopaths do) BUT, unless things change, your not sounding like your happy, if you aren't happy, how are you going to make her happy? In the end, if you feel like you should break up, and don't, you will hurt her way more than if you do it soon.Dating is all about learning what you like, and don't like in a partner. There are LOTS of other girls who will respect your wishes, and treat you with courtesy and respect.

Okay, I can tell were both not happy with it. Maybe If i just started it as a break it would be easier. I know im not happy with the relationship at the moment. So unless she can fix it then it wont work.

Good luck! Maybe it will change for you two after this? Who knows. I hope she stops with the drugs, irregardless of whether you two end up continuing or not.

Thanks, same here on the drugs, I told her if she did it again we would be over.