Threesomes

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So I've been doing some talking with my girlfriend and we both seem to like the idea of a threesome. We're aware of the dangers like jealously, STIs etc. But our main problem is finding a 3rd (female) participant. The obvious people are friends but how would you raise that? What would it be like afterwards. It almost feels like we need to find a stranger, but how to hell to find one?So... anyone out there who has had a threesome, how did you get your participants?

Well the first thing you need to know about threesomes is it isn't going to be like anything you've seen in the movies or read about in a book... they can be awkward, they can cause jealousy, and it can ruin friendships/relationships.Other than that... they can be fun! The threesome I had just kind of happened... there were drinks involved and someone brought it up in conversation and the next thing I know we're freezing our bums off in an house with no electricity or heat, getting down and dirty in a back room. It was with two of my friends, a one time thing, spur of the moment, and little awkward but tons of fun. Would I do it again? Maybe, depends on who its with.

Threesomes seem more to just happen than be planned out.As far as getting one of her friends to join in the fun. It's probably not to good of an idea. There's to much potential there for long term awkwardness, hurt feeling, and resentment, at least it seems that way to me. What you want is someone you can both dismiss easily out of your lives should things not work out.Ideally, especially for your first foray, into the world of threesomes you, most likely, should try to hook up with someone neither of you have a pre-existing close personal relationship with. Save that for when both of you have decided you like this and when your are completely secure in the situation with each other, even then approach it with hesitancy.When you go out looking for this person to play with in your relationship make it a team sport and use it as means for building your relationship, something that is enjoyable for the both of you. Dress up for each other with both of you assuming a single alpha mentality readied for the hunt. Equality in the team, that is you and your lady, is paramount, both of you working together like a pack of wolves to land your quarry. There can be no dom or sub (unless it's understood your into that kind of play and it's part of this) in the undertaking of a threesome within a relationship, less and wounds will arise and possibly scuttle the hunt if not your relationship. Where to go to hunt, anywhere you would normally pick-up a potential partner. Keep in mind though that what you all are looking for is going to make a lot of people uncomfortable, even those that are interested. So with that said, think about where you would best be able to find people a bit more at ease with the idea. The local book store might be a great place to meet women but how at ease are they going to be there with such a proposition. Further, it's probably not going to provide the kind of volume of people you need to find a willing third. Clubs will be better, more people to hunt and more importantly the anonymity of the crowd will put people more at ease and more open to the idea. Lastly, there are swingers clubs. They're going to offer the highest likely hood of success in your hunt for obvious reasons, though they aren't for everybody, myself included.A few things about swinger clubs, should you decide to go this route. Though there are generally several single ladies more often then not it's going to be couples looking to hook-up with another couple. Stick to the larger more fashionable clubs in large cities. They usually have a membership fee but it nominal and can get you instant access. Single males are generally never allowed unless as a guest of a member couple. Most of the better clubs have dress codes. Better clubs have DJs and large dance floors many with go-go dancers in cages or on stage, much like a typical club. No liquor is generally allowed on the premises. Most nice clubs will have high end juice bars instead. While many clubs don't offer any kind of on site hook-up area some do but there are always separated from the club itself. Some are very high-end sit a watch places with open sofas, rooms with one way glass so everybody can watch, as well as private rooms. Any club of quality is going to keep the hook-up rooms (or whatever they call them) impeccable simply because of what they're used for and to keep a good reputation and upscale client base. More often then not you'll find most clubs are just that, dance clubs where you find someone to get a number from or take home.Whatever you do just remember to do it together and as equal partners in the hunt and kill. Just be sure to always keep in mind that this has to be about making your relationship more enjoyable and stronger, in as much as, it is something that you are undertaking together. That may take some of the fun out of it but less than that and your opening your relationship to a mire of miseries.Having read all my shit here, if you have, keep in mind I've never done this in my relationship, nor do I think I would want to outside of fantasy. What I have done was just a fling and meant nothing. This is all simply based on reading and my own warped reasoning.

I agree with Scotty on this... I strongly suggest you look outside your realm of friends if you truly want to engage in a menage a trios because it really can ruin the relationship. I think you and your girlfriend should really think it through before making your choice.

Dude, I storngly advise against threesomes. I know from expierence. I had a threesome and it ruined my relaitionship. It wasn't till later did I realise that my ex-girlfriend was a lesbian. so dude if you care about your girl, dont do it. Just some advice from THE JEDI-ALCHEMIST.

College days...me...Regina...Trevor...in the bed of Trevor's pick-up...there were three...OHMYGOD! WAS THAT A THREESOME?!?

LOL!

I agree that threesomes just happen,if your looking for it it'll probly never happen,and they're hardly ever like you expect,if you care about each other there will probly be jealousy issues.If if's not a really close relationship with lots of trust it could be dissatrous to the relationship,but for some people you have a sound relationship it can actually bring them closer together and make you appreciate each other more.This I know from experience.

Yeah do not do it with someone you know...that would be to akward later.If you do want to follow through, a good idea for a place to find a willing partner would be at a "Fetish" party. If you live in or even close to a big city, if you hunt around in the adult stores (ask the clerks) or "alternative/goth" clubs, I'm sure you will find a party somewhere on an info card or something. These parties are full of people dressed in what turns them on as you will see people dressed in full lace outfits, leather and so but is still a majority of people in normal clothes. I am quite sure if you get into conversations there...you could easily find someone as people are there to talk sex, show off etc.Swinger clubs could work too...I havent actually been to one, but I know they are out there and usually ladies can get in being single.

I've done it with someone I know and I didn't experience any awkwardness.

I hadn't been back on this site to read all those messages of warning, so my girlfriend and I went out looking for a threesome. The general plan of attack was we find a girl we like (we were clubbing), I approach and dance with her, then all going well she (my gf) would join us and see how she responds.The first few tries were a mixture of either the girl not being that interested in me, or being weirded out when my GF came over. But later in the night when my gf went to the toilet I got asked to dance by a woman (30ish, I'm 19 heh). She seemed pretty into me so I sent my gf a text letting her know what was going on.Before she came over to join us I asked her if she would mind if someone joined us. She said it was all good, we danced for a while and things got a bit raunchy. We then pretty much told her what we came out to do, told her it was one off and no strings attached, and she seemed pretty excited by the idea.So yeah, the business end of things was a bit awkward to start off with, but we had some "sex dice" with things like lick, kiss, suck etc. on it. So that got things started and we just went from there. Very fun :). She left that night and all we know is her first name.

All's well that ends well.

Are you guys thinking about doing it again?

Not any time in the near future. I think it has spiced our sex life enough for now.

Quote: we had some "sex dice" with things like lick, kiss, suck etc. on it.Nice. I've got those too. Haha.

LOL, me too.