OK me and my boyfirnd have been toghther for over a year and having sex for i dont know over 7 months. Im probably the most insecure girl out there i have very small breats and not much of a womenly body im very like a pole. i just started getting completly comfortable with him and even let him see my breast (took along time to get enuf courage for that) but recently i found a whole bunch of pron on his computer he promised to get rid of it and i foyund more now im finding video tapes i had no idea about this. i never thought id react like this to a "guy thing" but all my insecurities have came back times 10. all i think about is him comparing me to all those other girls. all we do is fight about it now and my insecuritys are driving me back to depression. am i being stupid for being mad about his porn fetish? how do i get what little self confidence i DID have back? its driving our relation ship to hell and back and my depression into a serious problem what to do??
-
BOYFRIEND AND PORN!!??
-
i would talk to him. i used to watch a lot of porn (still do from time to time). my g/f didn't like it at first but now, she actually likes watching it with me. porn is not making love, they are fantasies. nobody has sex like they do in porn movies.as for your breasts. be confident. there are a lot of beautiful women/girls who do not strut big breasts!
-
we did talk and he said hed get rid of it but ive herd that before i dont know its just im so insecure that hes compariing my body to the girls in the videos. im so jealous and insecure thats all i think about when were having sex i think to my slef that hes thinking of those girls when were walking down the damn street all i think about is him imaging other girls im goinf crazzzzyyy
-
Hmm. This is a tough one. On one side, I think that perhaps you're overeacting a bit in thinking that all he does is compare you to the girls in porn. Obviously if he's stuck with you, and wants to try and give up his porn habit to keep you, he must care about you emotionally and not just for your body. On the other hand, though, you did say that he had promised this before, and all that happened was his habit got worse. I would suggest not just trying to make him give it up outright, but having a real honest down-to-earth talk about why you're insecure, I think the bigger problem you're expressing is not his habit so much as your own insecurities. It would probably be wise to address these concerns before getting to a point where your relationship is irrevocably damaged. Again, I'm not saying that his habit is right or necessarily acceptable; but you have to realize that it's probably very hard for him to give it up. Habits of sexual nature are tied to our animal instincts, and as such are very hard to supress. I dunno, just have a long sit down face-to-face talk and figure things out, because if you don't take care of it now, it sounds like it will come back to haunt you in the future.
-
i remember when my g/f found out about my stash. i was so embarrassed. i told her i would get rid of it too. don't worry too much about what he is thinking because i'm sure he is having a better time with you in bed. you will never be able to control what he is thinking and he can not control what you are thinking. why worry when you can smile and have fun!
-
Knowing your bf looks at porn is somewhat unnerving. I know, I used to have some insecurities about my bf looking at porn. He said he wouldn't look at it if it bothered me, but I don't think it was my place to ask him to stop. My bf told me that looking at porn gave him ideas for positions and things to do when with me. It got his mind working with fantasies. Guys work more with visual than girls and sometimes they just get into a "funk" and need to get their imagination going again. (I'm not speaking for all guys) Don't think about whether or not he is comparing you to the other girls. They aren't real people that he can touch...YOU ARE! When he wants to have some fun and be romantic he does that with you. I don't know if this will help. I'm just trying to put into words what my bf tells me about porn and guys. It would be better coming from him...
