Hellure, I browse this forum time from time, it seems like a great place. So, I hope this is in the right section?Okay, its a bit of a long story. I switched her name, but since my username, you know, CONTAINS my name, hahaha.I started high school 2 years ago, I finish this year. When I was in grade 10 I had a class, and she was in it. It was a computer class. I didnt notice her at all until November or so (were semesterd, so it was like 2 months left of class). I met her at the table all of our assignments would be put out on. It was kinda, seriously, something out of a Diane Steele novel, I went to grab the paper at the same time she did, I wasnt looking at her or anything. And when I felt the paper grab back at me, I looked at it and saw her hand and looked up and my heart skipped a beat. She was (and still is) beautiful, so stunning. I smiled and let her have the paper.I was so stupid back then, the first time I talked to her, I forget what I said, but I know it was something dumb. I was so shy, and I didnt know who I was really. So comes January, we were having the in-class exam. And the teacher put her and I next to each other. Awesome. So id make light chit-chat here and there with her. I asked this other girl in my class if they knew who she was, and yes she did. I added most of these people to MSN, except for Alice (changed name of girl). I eventually got the right peoples MSNs and they gave me Alices MSN.Alice is a shy, quiet girl. People tell me shes never had a boyfriend, and that I was really the only boy whos ever chased her. She doesnt party, or drink, or smoke, or do drugs (which I dont do and a quality I look for). I feel I share a lot in common with her. Shes super smart, im smart myself. Shes really nice, pretty, and easy to talk to. But in person, shes kinda quiet. However, that doesnt detour me. I would like to be with her. I talked to her just about everyday on MSN. We talked about common interest and shit. It seemed as if things were going really well. When I first added her to MSN she would be on like 3 times a week, and that changed to like every day. Eventually time progressed to about March or so, and I was talking to a girl she went to junior high with (and talked to me alot about it), and knew her fairly well. I asked her to see what Alice thought of me... She came back and told me that Alice only thinks of me as a friend. SO I gave ti a few days. I talked to Alice a few days later (my um... BIRTHDAY) and she said she wasnt interested. Burned ahahahaha. Soon she disappeared from MSN for a LONG time. Like September hahaha. So, from what I gather, and her and I talking in class more often, and then her comming on MSN more and more, and then dissapearing all together kinda gives a hint eh? (YES, im from Canada)So occasionally she will come on MSN and we talk all the time. Every time we talk its like she talks to me as if she doesnt have a crush on me or likes me, but doesnt talk to me as if I was a friend. Kinda like she was in the midst of getting to like me? We chat a lot when she comes on MSN. I send her emails occasionally too to see whats up. However, its only me that sends them. The last email I sent her she seemed pleased to talk to me? For the summer shes in another part of the province. Problem: She doesnt know the real me, and a bunch of people tell me that if she knew the real me, shed like me.I like her, I got over the first time. But shes back, and it kinda hurts cause I belive I have NO chance with her. Shes hardly on MSN for me to talk to her or arrange somehting. And I dont know her phone number. Plus, where shes shy im afraid to ask (no pun) her to get together, cause I dont want to scare her. Its my last year of highschool. Id LOVE to take her to prom. So A2A, how do you suggest I start over with Alice, and ask her to get together sometime as friends, and what do you make of it?I know its a lengthy post, but I hope/know you guys are the right people to ask!Thanks
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I need some advice, big time, Long Story
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If I were you I would try to just be straight with her- ask her how she thinks of you, and ask her yourself instead of having someone else do it. If she's shy, you might want to preface the question by telling her that she means alot to you as a friend and you don't want to mess that up, but tell her that you see the potential for being more than friends, too. Tell her that you just want to get things straight so that the two of you are on the same page, and, either way, as friends or as more, your relationship can continue to develop without any awkwardness or hidden feelings.If she's shy, you may have to put yourself out there first. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. It sounds like you must be pretty comfortable with this girl.If you think she doesn't know you well enough, tell her that you want to get to know HER better. It works both ways.
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Welcome to A2A, kevin007!Could I suggest that you don't want to get together with her as friends? You did that last time, and it wasn't what you wanted. You want to ask her to things that aren't too threatening, but still are more on the date side rather than the 'just friends' side. The prom is an obvious one, but I'm sure you can think of others - perhaps dinner somewhere?
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OK, i know EXACTLY the situation your in. The girl you are interested in is not very interested in you. she is stringing you along, but doesn't want to hurt you.If you want to get with this girl i suggest you do the following:1. Cancel ALL connections with her (myspace, aim,msn) and don't initiate convo with her in school.2. Take that pussy out of you pants, and replace it with a penis3. The biggest problem i've found in your post is that you talked to her everyday on msn. This is very needy behavior and a one way ticket straight to the friend zone.4. this is hard, and it will take some time, but you need to stop wanting this girl. wanting will cause her to move farther away5. after you've done this for a while, you need to treat her like one of you guy friends. you know, like joke around, TOUCH her, and what you naturally do.6. Let her see you with other women and she'll get jealous ( you won't believe the power of female jealousy)7. And once you do reconnect with her, act like a man. YOU are supposed to LEAD and she is supposed to FOLLOW.well more info on what type of girl might have been helpful, but this is what do in u situation with most girls.Although i highly recommend you forget about this girl and go for someone else, but i know sometimes that can't be done and you are stuck on her... so good luck.
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I agree with sex god 100%.I have no idea what kind of girl she is and what her personality's like, but here's a possible explanation.From what i assume, she's a lot like me.I'm more casual around guys and i treat them all like a brother.This means friendly touching, horsing around, sex jokes...etc.However.Having a personality like that has brought me a lot of unwanted trouble.Guys would interpret some of the little things i do as 'liking them' when in fact i treat all guys like that.But they don't know that.So now i've finally learned to keep the friendship at a minimum level until we know each other some more, namely until he knows me some more, and knows what i'm like...etc. Then when i'm sure he's not going to interpret anything wrong, that's when i go all out, and be my 'true' self.So back to you.She might be like that too.Getting together as friends is a wonderful idea.But be sure to invite mutual friends and go as a group rather than just you and her.Hope this offers some new insight.