Alright, I have quite a few friends at my school; however, there are some problems that come up dealing with certain things like their friends or stuff like drugs and alcohol, as I have a fairly wide spectrum of friends.First, I'll explain my problem that has to do with the knowledge that my friends drink and do drugs (mainly marijuana). They're good friends, but I don't really want to hang out with them in the sense of going to their house and hanging out, because I wouldn't want something like drugs or alcohol to come up, primarily because I don't want to do drugs or drink under age as I don't enjoy the idea of not being able to reason or have much control over my own actions. Heck, I don't know yet if I'll drink beer when I'm older (I'll probably drink wine, though). Am I choosing the intelligent choice by hanging out with them in school when I see them? The next part has to do with friends of my friends. Some of the friends of my friends aren't exactly what one would deem 'normal.' As in the kind of people who don't do much in school, do drugs, and have odd hair-styles and clothes and personalities. The thing that I find odd is that some of these friends that I have with those types of friends are people who do try in school and are even over-achievers. I don't know what to do in this situation.On the other spectrum of my friends are the people who could be considered as 'nerds.' I like hanging out with them in my Java class, but sometimes some of them can be really annoying. Although I have one friend who is more of a middle-ground like I am: intelligent, but doesn't go to extremes like some of my friends in Java class to 'nerdiness' or the friends that do drugs and drink. I think I'll see what off-period for lunch he has and see what he does then if it's the same as mine because it seems like that would be the best way to meet more people that are similar in that sense. One of the problems with not meeting those people seems to be the fact that I either don't have classes with people like that or I just don't get to talk with them often enough that I can get to know them better and vice-versa.These problems also kindof combine to form another problem. I don't really ever get to hang out with other people outside of school. I almost never see my best friend coming into highschool because we never have the same class or off-period and for some reason we haven't really been to eachother's house in a long time, though when we do get opportunities to hang out, it's fun. Then my other previous best friend decided to steal 200 dollars from my room one time he was over, so I don't ever talk to him. I guess the question is how to give myself more chances to hang out with other people at their house or just out of school.Thoughts?(Have to go, might add more later)
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Friends
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I definetely believe that there are different levels of friends.For example, there's those "school-only friends" where you hang out with them during school time, but would never really hang out with them after school.Then there's those friends who are much better/closer friends and you don't care where they hang out ("real friends" if you will).It seems to me like you have a bunch of "school-only friends" and not that many "real friends"
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Choice of friends can be important, and friends can pull us in a direction we don't want to go. If that becomes too bad it may become necessary to cut ties, though often you just drift apart naturally.However, be careful not to be too judgemental. Odd hairstyles and clothes don't matter. Personalities can be very different from our own and yet equally valid. We learn more from people who are different from us.You can invite people to your place, though it's best to have some specific activity in mind. You can't usually invite yourself to their place. Or you can invite them to join you in some activity (e.g. bowling) at another location.
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I'm not basing my opinions of the people with odd clothes and hairstyles. These are also the people who I've seen smoking right at the front of the school, and, personally, I'm far more against smoking cigarettes than smoking weed because of what I know about the two substances.
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All of them are technically "school friends" (except my best friend since 5th grade, but we rarely see eachother...) but I'm pretty sure some of them could be more than just school friends, especially the one in my Java class, and maybe another person in that class. When the basketball season starts, if we have a game where we have an extra ticket, I might ask one of them that likes basketball if they'd want to go to the game, though that seems like a while away. Anyways, school just started, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to 'advance' socially this year, as I have the last two of highschool.
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I think it's good to be choosy about your friends. I am too, as an adult.