Lemme tell u about my situation

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okay well back in september i found out that i was attracted to this one girl at my school. i had known her for like 5 years but i never really got to know her. we were friends when we were little but back then i was young and naive and i thought girls had cooties so i was mean to her, but i wanted to try and get this girl to like me. i was on the rebound too cuz i just got done with this other cuz she went and got a different boyfriend, so i started being really nice to this girl and i told her i liked her and everything but i also told her i liked all these other girls too so she really didn't think i liked her liked her, i wanted to go out with this chick but she had a boyfriend already but i don't know why i was just addicted to this girl and i kept telling myself to never give up on her so we became good friends and everything and then about maybe 3 months after i started getting to know her we were in class one time and we had a sub and i was sitting by her cuz we were talking and the sub was her past baby sitter so she iddn't care i was just sitting by her. well this sub came up to us and i don't really remember why but she asked if i like guys and i go no i like katie, that is the girl's name. then she got a face like this and she was laughing and i couldn't understand why me liking her was surprising becuase i had told her i liked her before and then she was like well u told me you liked everyone, so then we became really good friends after that and i still liked her and i tried to get her to go out with me but she still had her boyfriend and she kept trying to tell me that her boyfriends never gets jealous and i was like yeah sure w/e cuz i know how guys are. back then i wanted to make him jealous. finally during basketball practice her boyfriends best friend was talking to me and he was telling me how he wanted to beat the shit out of me and how he was gonna break up iwht katie and this made me happy but kind of sad cuz i didn't want her to be sad but i thought that the only thing between me and her is her boyfriend. well they finlaly made up after a while and it was back to being a good friend. everybody in my school always said all i ever did now was spend time with katie and devote everything to her. i would talk to her friends and everything and i would be like saying stuff and then they would go jeeze steven ur in love and well i thought i was and i thought about telling this girl i was in love but i didn't know if i was in love yet cause i had only gotten to know her like maybe 4 months ago from that time and it was i think january. i had just gotten over telling that one girl i loved her and everything. i said i loved her like more than anything but then i realized i most definitely was not in love. i was just looking for some girlfriend i wanted her to like me a lot. i was afraid telling this new girl i loved her cuz i woldnt' think she would believe me. i didn't tell her and we continued being good friends and everything. then things started getting interesting, my whole lifed changed because of this girl. i started spending all of my time with her and we became really close. we had a really strange relationship. then i finally realized i was in love with her so i told her and she was always telling me about how she had a boyfriend and she couldn't like me or anythign cuz it would be weird cuz we are such good friends, so i was like okay but i still lvoed her. then a little while after that her and her boyfriend broke up but i still didn't ask her otu even though i knew i could get her cuz she told me a long time ago she would go out with me if she wasn't already goping out with this guy. i wanted to wait for the right time. well it turns out they eventually started going back out even though they were like never "officially going out" cuz he never asked her but they were practically going out as everyone put it. this guy is a dick by the way. so then i was constantly expressing my feelings toward her but we just kept on being good friends but then i started getting all depressed cuz of her then she would make me happy and we would talk all the time and she would tell me how like 60% of her life is trying to not make me depressed cuz towards the end of the school year i wold get depressed and not talk to her for half a week. it is very complicated i think. we would argue all the time and evryone would be like jeeze u two argue like a married couple. then we became seriously like best friends even though i was in love with her. but she would come over to my house and she would constantly tell me not to tell anyoen cuz she didn't want her boyfriend to know. she was always telling me things she wouldn't even tell her best girlfriends. like how she is transfering schools next year and she didn't want to tell anybody cuz they would all get sad and she would get kicked off the basketball team. we were so close to each other but she was still going out with this guy. then finally school got over and it was so unbelieveable how long i loved this girl and how much my life changed because of her. she knew i liked her more than anyone else but there was nothing she could do about it. then the summer came and we got even closer. she would come over all the time and still she wouldnt' tell anyone. and now this summer i have been getting serious signals and i dont' know what to think. she has been tellign me how her boyfriend is annoying her like crazy and she starts these conversations that really start to make me think and she is going away for a week and then she writes me a 37 page letter. that wasn't the first one she sent me either. we wrote letters to each otehr during the school year just cuz it is fun to get long letters in the mail. then i would leave and write super long letters and she would always be telling me how she thinks about me all the time and how she loves me. she never said she is in love with but she is always telling me she loves me. she wants to meet at secret places at night nad the other day we went up to indy all day to watch some basketball and she is now telling me she really doesn't give a fuck what her boyfriend thinks if he finds out what we do. i really dont' know what to think. i know i lvoe this girl more than anything and she is my best friend and i literally have like no other friends now because of her but she still has that same boyfriend but she tells that she would nevergo out with me and i dont' konw whta to think. it kind of sounds like obsession on my part but i think it is a godly obsession and she even thinks that too cuz the otehr day she was talking about how maybe god wants her to make me happy cuz maybe we have something to do with each otehr in teh future and she is telling me how we are good foreach other. i don't know if she likes me or we aer just super great friends. maybe youcan tell me waht you think about this. you really can't comprehend our relationship by just reading this cuz i can't describe everything that has happened in the past 11 months. o yeah and another thing is she is crying about how she wants me to go to her school and i told her i would switch schools for her even though she doesn't believe me. i'll reply again if i think i left out something important. thanks to those of you who may actually reply and tell me whta they think

I am in the middle of reading it, but it you are going to type shit this long use proper grammar and check your spelling because it makes shit way confusing.

Here's alittle summary correct me if I am wrong. You had a crush with this one girl. The only thing that's stood between you the last year is her boyfriend. She keeps giving you mixed emotions and she finally said that she would never going out with you, after she told you She would you, but She has a Boyfriend. Then she told you that you are "made" for each other and you don't know what to think.Before I comment on what you should do you need to tell me if she is still dating that guy.

okay first it is hard to type all that this late at night and my keyboard has orange juice in it so teh keys are messed up. okay so yeah they are still going out but even today she was like he is pissing me off cuz he is being so annoying and she was like idc how pissed he gets when he finds out about us going to and 1 together. plus she said she would go out with me at the beginning of the year before we really got close then she was like we are too good of friends to go out but the last time she told me that was a couple of months ago

also i think she is afraid of what her friends woudl say if she went out with me cuz her boyfriends tries to get everyone to hate me and i do piss off a lot of people so i'm not too popular with her friends

Was my summary somewhat accurate? Tell her to fuck her theory about being to good of friends. You need to have a conversation about how badly you want her and you need to express how much you love her.

Anyways how old are you?

okay we constantly have long talks about how i feel. she knows how much i love her. she says stuff like you probly care about me more than my parents care about me and she says i know more about her than even her parents know. i think everything will work out great for both of us. she even asked me to the prom and she asked me to dorm with her at college. she's crazy. i know her like the backside of my hand. she thinks i'm phsycic and she used to think i could read her mind. like she called the other day and i picked up the phone and i said her name and i dont even have caller id and she was like i'll give you a million bucks if you can tell me what i'm doing right now and i giev her the right answer. and the other day i was at her house we were all alone in the house and being with her is just pure bliss cuz i'm not even thinking about anything other than how great it is to be with her and how happy she makes me, but then again she can depress me so bad. she is like my whole life. whenever i go to talk to God he puts all these thoughs in my head about me and her and it pisses me off. i try to ask him how we are meant for each other and he just keeps telling me to stay around her cuz good things will happen and lately things have been going great. btw i'm 15 but we aer a lot more mature than most teens our age. we aer probly the in top 5 of smartest teens in our grade. i'm not trying to brag i'm just dont want u to think i'm a little kid who doesn't konw what he is talking about, well i know a lot about this world!

You would be one of the top 4 smartest if you could type.

Why did you ask everyone if you have all of the answers?

sorry i'm tired and it is late where i live and what do you mean by Why did you ask everyone if you have all of the answers? don't chastise me cuz my keyboard is screwed up. it is like typing with semen in the keyboard! it ain't easy.

I mean you know all of your intentions and when I questioned you based off your first post you knew the answers. It just seems like you really don't need help!

plus i really wasnt asking anything i just wanted to know what you thought about my situation

It seems like you won't give her up and she really doesn't wan't anything except your friendship. But the last post about Prom and sharing a dorm sot of changes my initial opinion. Does that answer your question?

I'm afraid that being the "second boyfriend" is not a very secure position. It's good for her - she gets someone to complain about her boyfriend to, to fill in the areas her boyfriend lacks - but I don't see her dropping him, do you?Aim away from the keyboard next time.

i'm really not worrying about being her boyfriend or anything cuz we have an awesome friendship and it really makes me happy but the other day she was saying stuff like i don't even need a boyfriend right now. i think i'm kind of glad i'm not her boyfriend cuz boyfriends dont really last forever and i know the kidn of friendship we have will alst forever. it is just hard that i don't want to be with anybody else and i dont' want to go out with somebody else cuz i love her and whe ni talk about other girls or whatever she seems jealous, like the other day we were at conseco fieldhouse and i was just kind of goofing around and looking at this group of black girls and i was kind of like DAMN! and she caught me looking at them and it she like waved her hand in my face and was like hey you! i know she was just kidding with me and everything but she was like don't look at girls. i was thinking well hey i'm not going out with you so i'm free to do what i want. she just confuses me all the time. she also thinks that we wouldn't be great friends with each other if i wasn't in love with her so i think she tries to keep me to herself so we can be friends. IDK!!!!!

JC what a goofy relationship! It's hard to believe she's still with that prick! Hopefully for your sake when they breakup you could add benefits to your reationship.

but the thing is idk if i wanna add benefits, it isn't really about going out or anything i just wanna have her be in love with me and that is pretty much it cuz when she says she loves me my heart beats so fast and i feel so great and if we were "in love" then it would be so awesome cuz then i would always know that i have someone who cares for me so much and all that stuff that goes with being in love. now that i think about i know she cares about me a lot and now i'm crying. i just wanna make her happy. it is a happy cry feeling

What does IDK mean?

i don't know=idk