Hey,To cut things short, I'm sick of lying to my girlfriend about this. I feel rotten. I have found out, through myself, that when I'm aroused, I tend to objectify women. Thus I'll happily look at porn (daily).I am beginning to hate myself, I love my girlfriend to bits so I'm wondering why the hell it is I keep going back to it. After I'm finished I always feel like rubbish for a while, and wonder how the hell it is she puts up with me. By the time I'm next aroused a day later or so, that's all thrown out the window and I just can't stop myself from going back to it.Do you all have any tips? I really want to pull this addiction out from the roots and cast it into a fire. I want to stop.. objectifying women when I'm aroused. Thanks.
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Addiction To Porn
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Your addicted to porn if you pay more attention to it than your gf. Or you'd rather watch/masturbate to it than be with your gf.
So what's wrong with objectifying a fantasy related object????
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Thanks for sharing your dilemma. I know it's not easy to face that, and even harder to say it (or type it). You should know that you are not alone here. There are many of us - on this board and in the world around you - who share your struggle.First of all, don't make the mistake of thinking that your obsession with porn means you love your girlfriend any less. That's not necessarily the case. It might compromise your ability to be intimate with her (and by intimate, I mean spiritually/relationally, not necessarily sexually), but it is not a statement on how you feel about her. One of the ways you know an addiction is an addiction is that it robs time and energy that should be given to those you love and/or those you have an obligation to (including yourself).Addiction flourishes in darkness. It's a secret thing. The best way to begin kicking it in its ass is to bring it out of the darkness. If you can begin to eliminate the secret aspect of your behavior, you are taking a huge first step in eliminating the behavior. This might mean sharing your struggle with your girlfriend. It might be sharing it with a trusted friend, or minister, or youth minister (I'm not sure how old you are). Or even finding an SA group, if you feel it's come to that.There is help if you want it. I don't want to take up a lot of time and space here. But I would be happy to help you in any way I can. Offer my perspective and experience. Point you to some good sources and resources. Whatever. Just PM me if I can help.
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I wonder if what you (and some feminists) call "objectifying women" is just the normal male sexual feeling?
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Originally Posted By: IneligibleI wonder if what you (and some feminists) call "objectifying women" is just the normal male sexual feeling? Good point.
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Thanks guys.I'll take you up on that offer Damien. ;). Well it's quite hard to explain really, I was hoping that you would understand where I was comming from. The objectifying thing isn't my greatest conscern, because as you said, it could just be the typical male sexual feeling etc. I actually managed to do without it since I posted that, but I've fallen to it yet again.. Sigh.