my mother frustrates me so badly, here i am helping with rent and with the house cleaning, and yet i cant even spend the night at a friends house or hang out. its frustrating, if im man enough to pay bills and to provide for myself, why is it i cant be man enough to dictate what i do.i can understand if she had plausible reason, but she just says "no because i said so"who is she to dictate that? im a man. although i am TECHNICALLY underage, i do grown things, so i feel i should be a grown up, and make my own decisions...i dont understand her, any mothers care to share insight? sry im just venting.
There are a few factors operating.One is that parents feel responsible. They feel responsible as parents, they feel more responsible when you are under 18, but they feel most responsible when you are living with them. That's why you can go out partying when you're living elsewhere, and they can know that you are and do nothing, but when you're living with them they won't let you. They consider that if something happens to you while you are living with them, they will be held to account. When you're living with someone else, however, they consider that it's (mainly) that person's responsibility.A second factor is that parents (and perhaps especially mothers) remember you as the little boy you once were. It can be hard for them to realise you have grown; even harder to realise you have grown up and can face the world by yourself. Letting go is often very difficult for parents, and some find it difficult many years after 18 or 21 have gone by.It's also important to remember that while parents often are too timid and unprepared for their children to be taking risks, and often over-estimate the risks, teens, on the other hand, tend to under-estimate risks and often believe they can get through anything unscathed. They also tend to under-prepare and under-plan, and over-estimate their skills.
I'd agree with this.
To the OP; you might be very mature for your age, but you lack a lifetime of experience that your mother has. She knows the risks, dangers and values (being "cool", peer pressure etc) that youth have, and fears that something might happen.
Despite how mature you are, or the hard ships you may have already faced, you are still very young, and have a lot to learn still. She's just being protective, maybe overly so, but she cares for you all the same.
i kinda get what you guys are saying, but i do just wish i could get a little bit more wiggle room. i think that i have a very strong will power. i mean im the rapper for a party crew, so im not about to goto a party and get trashed. that makes no sense.and also yesterday, i didnt even drink. i smoked my cigarettes, but i would of done that here as well. there were like 4 or 5 kids inhaling computer cleaner like 3 of them were doing NOS.but i think all that is stupid, i dont even smoke weed anymore.i only stayed living with my mom because she needed me to (for the rent and such) i love my mother and all but she does need to realize that i am becoming a man, but ill always be her baby.