Ok, so, my daughter has been "going out" with a guy for nearly a year now, they've known each other for about 3 years.I know his parents, and we get along well, same sort of principles and such.But recently, I have been feeling that she is just with him, because of the "first love" thing. He is texting at in appropriate times, he broke his curfew recently, and lol, she knows he doesn't bathe everyday.So, I know better than to tell her he is a loser, because I don't beleive he is, but I do beleive, that they ARE different enough. Honestly, don't want them both hurt, because she runs off to college, and he is still mowing lawns. I also don't want her just to feel obligated because they are friends for so long. Is there a gentle way to steer her towards being "healthily independant" versus, hanging on because he seems the most "normal"?
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Do I just ride it out?
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I think the more pressure you put in one direction, the more she will move in the other.It's her choice. All you can do is gently give your opinion.
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I would definetly stay out of it. She probably won't take what you have into consideration. I never want to hear what my mom says in that area.. and if she ever said anything bad about Josh it just really pissed me off and caused an arguement. Same with all my friends.We think we know everything.But you're ALWAYS right. ( i hate admitting that to my mom)Just let her make her own decisions.. that's the only way she'll learn.. through her own mistakes.
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Hey Pepsi.. How is one of my favorite girls doing... Isn't parenting fun..LOLWell about your topic... That's a tough call.... We try as parents to guide our children in the right direction and give them enought space to feel like they are maing their own decisions...We had a similar situation in our home. My daughter was 15 and Luke was 16... I wasn't sure what to do but decided to send my daughter upstairs for something and confronted her b/f. I told him what he was doing was unexceptable and it would stop if he wanted to continue seeing her. I told him he needed to shower before coming over here becasue he smelled of body odor and ass and I found it offensive..He listened and took my advice. but I think my talking to him opened the door for my daughter to openly speak to him about the tabo topic becasue, she would tell me they had an argument about him wearing dirty clothes, or not taking a shower before picking her up. They began to have problems and eventually broke up. Luke was and still is a good kid. He is attending college and sends emails to me about one a week. Teenage boys are a strange breed. Most of the time they have no clue what they are doing is offensive and they just need to be told. A lot of times people just let it slid because they're boys... My parents didn't and I carried that forward in my home too.Help them but let them experience it too. Hope that helps... send me a PM if you need to talk...
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Originally Posted By: Roc Luke was and still is a good kid. He is attending college and sends emails to me about one a week. Teenage boys are a strange breed.LOL, yes they are! And you hit the nail on the head, it isn't like this kid is BAD, just different enough from her. I guess I will have to let her make her choices, it is not as if he is abusive, or does drugs, or anything like that. And lord knows I made enough of my own mistakes to make them for her too!!! Thanks everyone, especially you Roc, you knew EXACTLY where I was coming from.
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Quote: Teenage boys are a strange breed. Most of the time they have no clue what they are doing is offensive and they just need to be told. ick... how can some one want to be dirty! or maybe I’m on hte odd side (ok i am) and have to be clean.. when i was a teen (that 14 - 16 age...) i was taking a bath almost 4 times a day. yea.. when i started seeing my nut doc he told my parents to only allow me to take 1 hot shower a day... i dk.. I guess worked. but i still do take 2 a day. morning after getting up and one at night when i come in for the night. i really can't stand being funky...shann's mom made her stop seeing me. after we moved that summer she told me she couldn’t take the long distance thing. fuck she really never tried it. and i had just got out the hospital so.. not really news i wanted to hear. but anyway... later on i found out that my mom had told shannon;s mom what happened (me trying to slit my wrist and being put in the hospital and Shannon’s mom convened her she didn’t need to be with a boy like that.... so she dumped me. BUT guess what.... we are back together..... despite what her mom thinks of me. Shannon told me (years go) that her mom’s view of me changed when she found out about the shit that was going on... BUT it’s still in my head that i'm "that boy"... anyway... don’t really don’t know Shannon’s mom’s true feelings about me but we are engaged so.... her daughter is mine even if she likes me or not.
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That's good.
So many of my friends are dating hooligans. At least your daughter is fortunate enough to not have one of those!
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cleanliness was never a problem for me. for a long time iv taken 2-3 per day (morning night and after school).my gf a couple years ago (i was like 14), father made me go to the shooting range with him and showed me he could shoot a gun well and told me to never hurt fuck or cheat on his daughter. needless to say that ended quite quickly.
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These guys don't have showers yet somehow are getting girls? Is it something in the air there?I'll have taken a shower and then an hour later when im with a girl, I'm usually paranoid, even if I have to really think hard about whether or not I smell, when I never do!Seriously, the girls here, wow. I have to workout constantly to have the whole model status body, hair cut in an appealing way, clean, good fashion style. It's still a struggle, I know for my friends who aren't I guess blessed get turned down a lot. I guess the girls are way more demanding..Anyways sorry for that rant, but anything you tell your daughter she won't listen, usually I do the opposite of what my parents tell me to do, even sometimes JUST to annoy them even if its an inconvenience for me.As for parents always being right someone mentioned. Come meet mine.Anyways, sorry for that rant but