now, for the people that know of my sister, and all the depression/stress she causes me, they know i hate her so strongfully. hate is a strong word, and i use it to every ounce of strength it has.for people who dont know of her, shes ridiculed me for my decisions since i was a child, she's called me nigger, my girlfriends niggers, said that my music was crap and i'd never accomplish anything in my life, and that im just a piece of shit that my mother never wanted me...and thats just a summary of half the things she says to me.my mother told me that my grandma was coming to live with us, which im cool with, i love her, then she dropped the bomb on me, that my sister was going to be staying with us for a while (supposedly, but i know her, and she'll be here for a couple of months) after hearing this, idk why but my body went into shock and i threw up, ive been throwing up all night.the last time she was here, she forced me into counciling/therapy, i was consistently smoking and drinking.now our financial situation is a bit obscured and now we cannot afford it, and i just dont understand how it is im going to make it through theses next unpromising months.shes so immature, and irresponsible, and just overall a worthless person. the world would literally be better without her.ive been throwing up all night, and smoking newports all day. ive drank 3 40's and still nothing has soothed the pain in my stomach. what am i going to do!? she'll be here within hours. and im resenting every minute as it flys by.
The Demon Returns
not too sure if 40's are going to sooth your stomach.Maybe its time to tell her how it is and put her in her place. Shes not your mother and needs to stop acting like it.
i have tried, so many times. ive done so much for her, to try and get her to realize that shes an adult, with a child, and that she has responsibilities. but im not one of them.but yet, nothing... i feel that for next X amount of months, ill be home minimally.