Ok, personal-post-2 here we go...You can skip the blue and just go down to the pink, which is the main point of the post if you wish, the blue is there if you have time. I put this in the 'Relationships' section but this thread is more to do with the lack of as opposed to a problem with the aforementioned. Generally I wouldn't post something like this, I prefer to sort it out in my head, but it's very quiet around here (apart from the Can't We Just Get Along Thread and the random IQ turn it's taken), and this has also been going on for too long.I have five very close girlfriends, you know the ones that you've known since you were tiny and have pictures of back in the day when we could fit into suitcases (the smaller ones). Well, these five fantastic lassies all have boyfrinds. Two of their relationships have hit the three year mark while the other three's the one year. This has never happened to me. Sure I've kissed guys but it's never really meant anything, I've never really felt like a huge attraction to them. No, I'm not gay (this will be proven in the next paragraph). I'm not saying I feel incomplete or anything, cuz that's downright silly, but I really just want to have somebody who wants me back.There's this one guy, I met him a few months ago at work. I wasn't attracted to him at the beginning (in a romantic way). I even remember somebody asking me (in a very implicatory (if that word exists - coming from ''imply'') sort of way) ''any guys?'' and me replying, quite definitavely ''no''. However, over the next few months, I got to know him really well. Apart from this one fantastic guy who has been a really good friend over the past few years (nope, nothing there, he's gay), I would say that he's the closest I've ever been to a guy. We talked about everything, literally. Name it and it's probably been discussed at some length. My problem now is that I've completely fallen for him. 100%. Any other guy I see, I compare against him. His personality is just so great: he's funny, extremely smart, witty and great to be around. He's nice looking too, in case you're wondering, and he's got the nicest smile and eyes. sigh I don't know what he would say, but I personally think we click. I don't see him as often as I used to now, but I can't stop thinking about him. I go to sleep thinking about him, I wake up and he's imprinted in my brain. I can't stop thinking about him. It's completely ridiculous. BUT he has a girlfriend, of one and a half years. There's a boyfriend, a girlfriend and a me. I am completely head over heels liking (not loving, I can't say I know what that is) the boy. I can't stop thinking about him, I can just imagine being close to him, a single kiss, just to have him hold me. A crappy day will completely brighten up if I see him, no matter how I feel. What do I do?
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Lack of a Special Someone...
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Speaking from personal experience, all you can do is be a friend. Enjoy his company on a friend-basis and be there for them should something happen to their relationship.If it is meant to be, then something will blossom eventually, and it may turn out to be the best thing to ever happen to you.It doesn't work all the time, mind you, but it's the best chance you have. Just don't be disappointed if nothing works out. Do not under any circumstances try and break them up or he may end up resenting you. Just offer positive support should he need it.
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I don't think there's anything you can do. You can be his friend, you can be around waiting but that's about it. The best thing to do would be to live your life try on a few other guys and stay friends with him. That way not stuck in a rut waiting for something that may never come but your still in contact if it does.
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Yup that sounds right about what I was thinking. Quote:Do not under any circumstances try and break them up or he may end up resenting you.Oh my Gosh never ever, don't worry! He seems happy enough with her and I'd never want to take away something thats going good for him. A biiig no-no.As for the being disappointed thing, I won't be. It's hardly going to happen. I suppose it's just wishful thinking. Nothing like this has ever worked out for me, as can be seen from the essay above, and I don't expect it to any time soon. Which begs me to pose the question, why? What is so unlikeable about me, in more than a platonic sense? I've posted here a good few times, you guys may know my personality a bit. What is it??? Quote:try on a few other guysThat would be lovely. Ok this is gonna sound pretty weird, I don't really feel 'drawn' to anybody else. A few weeks ago I was out and about and started chatting to this guy. He was very nice, polite but he just wasn't you-know-who. Pathetic right?Thank you for the posts OldFolks and sadbuttrue. Off I go to give another dose of positivity to...can you guess?...a friend with boyfriend problems. Rub. It. In. My. Face. (maybe I should be more sombre, maybe I'm too happy. Hmmmm....stroking my imaginary beard).smiles
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How strong of an attraction do you have to have to date someone? I'm not saying screw but go out with and have a good time. Instead of waiting for the knock you off your feet guy why not date around. You never know, you might not realize who the knock you off your feet guy is until you've been out with him a couple of times. Love is strange shit and it rarely happens in an instant, like in the storybooks. Many people have fallen head over heels for some one that they never would have imagined themselves with just a few dates prior.There's some shit to moosh around into big pile and ponder over.
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Give me back my storybooks! And, and, and my princes with their super-shiny armour and talking horses/donkeys... Bah-humbug, what you say is right. I've always lived in my own little fantasy world, expecting something straight out of ''An Officer And A Gentleman''...he loves her, but can't show it, but love conquers all, he can't live without her. Aww. But no, knocks head on table get back to the real world.
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Originally Posted By: sunshine_babyNothing like this has ever worked out for me, as can be seen from the essay above, and I don't expect it to any time soon. Which begs me to pose the question, why? What is so unlikeable about me, in more than a platonic sense? I've posted here a good few times, you guys may know my personality a bit. What is it???That is a rut I was in for the best part of 16 years. Only recently have I got out of that rut and that is thanks to me finally meeting someone.They throw clichés around like "you may need to wait but it will be worth it" and it seems like crap, but trust me, it's so true.Why does it happen that way for some people? I don't know.Pretty much all the guys I know have always had someone in their lives. I guess I'm the odd one out in that respect.I can't really offer much advice beyond that. From what I can tell you seem like a kind, really caring and helpful person, and to some people those are the most important qualities.
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How true!