I know this question is asked alot on here, but I'm kinda freakin out a bit and would like some direct input. I'm 18 years old and am technically still a virgin (I had sex for all of 30 seconds and lost erection...so I count myself as a virgin). I've "fooled around" with countless girls and always have an erect penis while we mess around. However, every time a girl has brought up sex, I can never seem to keep it up long enough to get undressed, throw the condom on, and put it in. Its extremely frustrating because I really (like, unbelievably bad )want to have sex, but every time I try, my johnson just kinda "goes away". From what I've read it seems like I'm suffering from "performance anxiety"...but I've been put in the awkward "Ummm...why can't you get it up?" situation a good 8 times now and I don't think I can go through another one of those. Any advice?
Can I get some advice?
Tell her she's your first and that your nervous. She may get even more turned on by guiding you into manhood, so to speak. In addition to that it'll take a shit load of pressure off you.Honesty who'ld a thunk it.By the way I know of what I speak cause that's what I did my first time and it was unbelievable.
OK guy, I had the exact same problem with you.
For the whole time I was with a girl I would be ready and raring to go, but as soon as there was a requirement for it to be hard it went away. It was frustrating to say the least, and it caused me psychological issues, as well as probably denting the confidence of the girl as well.
It took quite a lot to get this problem to go away, and it's not completely gone but it's a HELL of a lot better for me.
What I needed to do was make sure that everything was right.
I needed to be with someone I loved (so no one-night stands or fuckbuddies). I needed to be in a relaxed atmosphere (i.e. my bedroom) and I needed to have time. No rushing. It's all about getting used to the situation. They say practise makes perfect - it does. Just get yourself used to being in those situations. Explain to your girlfriend what is troubling you, and you'll be surprised how understanding she will be. As long as she knows that you don't expect anything to happen, then she won't be disappointed. This way you can concentrate on how much you love her and how special your time together is. Eventually things will start to happen :smile:
I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh at your problem, but it reminds me of the Seinfeld episode when George was dealing with the same problem. I'm sorry I can't offer more advice, I'm not old enough yet, but make sure you're comfortable and I agree, let her know and it will all be okay. Hang in there!
A lot of people have trouble getting it up the first few times, then once they manage to, they're done after like one thrust. You could try doing some stuff that really turns you on just before it, and just try and keep the excitement up. It'll happen eventually, you just have to calm your mind down.