So I've been seeing this guy for a few weeks now, I made a post about him previously...he's actually someone I went to middle school and high school with back in the day, but we didn't re-connect until 8 to 10 years later. We're both 22/23 now. He is like the love of my life, but I was really odd back then so no one really talked to me that way then...now he's all talkin' to me like that.
I only get to see him once a week, even though he lives 7 to 10 minutes away. And it pisses me off that he is the one who brings up first that he doesn't get to see me often. It's not like he's going to school because he's not. All he is doing is working and hanging out with his friends. He doesn't have to lie to say he's always busy...he can just say to prefer to hang out with his friends a lot of times. His job isn't even that hectic.
Whenever he decides to stop bs'ing around, it's usually on a Sunday. He'll ignore me during the week and I won't hear anything at all from him until Sunday...and I'm so sick of it...so I finally told him straight to his face, how I don't like that he tells me to text him later to see if he can hang out but he never responds AT ALL. What does he say to me anyway, to still text him...and I, unfortunately, cave and do, and still get ignored...until Sunday, if any day he gets back to me. After I called him out on ignoring me, he's doing it back even worse.
Today is Sunday. It's not just any Sunday but the day before my birthday. Part of me wants to believe that he'll come around because the only thing he's been consistent on is seeing me on Sundays whether or not he answers me during the week...and I really do want to believe he'll like buy me a drink for my birthday or whatever else we talked about.
However, I just have this sinking feeling that this Sunday will be different and he'll finally be an ass to its fullest and ignore me completely. This is me predicting that he'll crush me on my birthday weekend. I know I should not let a guy ruin me, but I can't help it. He's the first guy in a long while, to have stuck around for so long who I actually showed a genuine interest in...and not to just hang out/be with someone because I'm lonely.
My question is here, before he was ignoring me, he was paranoid about catching a STD from me. I only have one partner currently...him. He's the one who has multiple ones and I even told him if any of us two would have something, it would definitely be him...even though he says he's gotten tested before and was clean.
So I went to get tested this past week, since I've never been tested before anyway. Should I text him to say I'm clean and if he ever catches something to NOT look my way...or just don't say anything at all?
The last time I tried to get a hold of him was on a Wednesday. I haven't talked nor seen him since last Sunday evening/Monday morning. It's driving me nuts and I'm sick of the suspense.
I've been blunt numerous times and still he's never blunt and always leaving me hanging and I hate it. Every time I think he ignores me for good he always comes around on Sundays, but I just don't think this time he will which is why I'm asking should I text him one last time to tell him I'm clean or just forget about it? I'm predicting that he won't get back with me, not that it has actually happened yet.
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A Dilemma.
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I really hate to say this, but I told you so.Whatever happened to just wanting to be fuck buddies?How has he now become the love of your life?Exactly what I said would happen is happening. He doesn't seem to be interested in you in that way. Ignoring you for a week is NOT a relationship. If he's gonna be that harsh to you the day before your birthday, he better have a really amazing surprise for you tomorrow.It sounds to me, and I'm gonna have to put this as honestly as I can, that he was just using you for sex, and will only bother getting in contact with you when he needs it because he can't get it elsewhere (hence the STD line).I'm sorry to tell you but he just does not seem interested in you.
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I know he was just using me for sex, and I was fine with that. He always came over way late in the middle of the night. We never hung out properly like during earlier than the night. I'm not bothered by the fact that he's messing around with other people or using me for sex. I'm just bothered by the fact that he's ignoring me and getting a hold of me only when he wants it...but when I try to get a hold of him whenever I want it, he doesn't respond. I don't really care if he does stuff with others as long as I don't catch anything from him.But should I tell him that I'm clean, since he thinks he'll catch something from me? Before he re-connected with me he told me the week before me he had met this girl at a bar but never called her back so I'm sure he can pick and choose, though since he has apparently many options.I hope he has an amazing surprise for me, too. However, I'm not going to expect much.
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I'm not quite sure if you're getting my point here.
You are blatantly interested in him as more than a sexual partner. But he is not.
In fact it seems like he's barely interested in you for the sex. If he's not bothering to contact you then I'm afraid he has better things to do.
You hold out hope that he will be back. That's not the actions of a fuckbuddy.By telling him you're clean, you may get him back for a short time. Though if you ask me I think the STD line was just a way of him telling you to leave him alone.
Do you not respect yourself enough to want an actual relationship? I'm frankly surprised that you're willingly volunteering to be used like this!
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I honestly don't get him really. If the STD line was his way of telling me to leave me alone, I'm not sure why he asked me to text him during the week to see what he's up to. I've confronted him about him not answering me several times, and I asked him why he still wants me to text him if he doesn't answer, and yet he still asks me to text him.I'm at the verge of not caring anymore. Honestly, I haven't run into better at all even though there is supposedly better out there and also even though I know I can do better.
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OK look. There are some men out there who are assholes.Picture this. The "love of your life" as you put it is sat in a bar with all his guy friends. He shows them a text from you that probably goes something along the lines of "I can't wait to have your dick again". They all go "whoa dude, go get some" and he replies "nah, so not interested in that".Then they decide it would be really funny to lead you along and send a text from his phone getting you to ask what he's doing some time.That is just one of a possible million scenarios that could be played out.You need to look at the facts here. Perhaps if I lay them out for you you'll realise whats going on. He only ever uses you for sex He barely speaks to you He refuses to hook up with you in case you have an STD, even though you're only sleeping with himYou said yourself, he's pretty much a waste of space You have admitted you have a crush on him and that he's the love of your life, but not once has he said anything even close to you See what I'm getting at? He's playing you. Plain and simple.
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Yeah, I can't help but think that you're probably right about him showing texts. I just texted him to tell him that I was clean. I didn't ask him to hang out anymore. That's up to him if he decides to get off the bullshit.I was surprised he responded to me right away...then again, I remember today is Sunday, lol. It's messed up.He keeps saying he hasn't been with anyone else since me, but I don't really believe him.Honestly, he's a bum going nowhere in life. He's 23-years-old, still livin' at home with his parents smokin' weed all the time...getting high with his friends.Just this past year he graduated from fucking high school with the equivalent of a HS Diploma...because he was a big slacker in high school and dropped out, doesn't care, didn't graduate with our class. I'm sure if he tried hard enough he would have gotten the regular diploma.God, I sure know how to pick them. I don't even know why I like the mother fucker in the first place.I constantly question myself this every single day.
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Sounds like hes an idiot and isnt worth your time. You should start treating him the way he's been treating you. Wait for him to text you.. then wait a week to text him back! Fuck being treated like shit! You're better than that!You should see this as a good opportunity to live the next year of your life happy.. I dont see that happening with him being there.
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Thanks Steph. Actually, I never thought about doing that. I was so caught up in being annoyed with him ignoring me that I didn't think to do the same thing back. You're right, too. I wonder what his reaction would be. I should try that some time!
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How about now! lol.