Don't be mad at me, I feel awesome.

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So... this guy I've been going out with for a couple months now is like... the love my life. Seriously. I love him to pieces. Ok so he's 5 years older but I'll be 18 in April. And he's so intelligent like he can actually put a sentence together and know what he's talking about. He doesn't say "nah mean" and "fa sho my nigga" after every run-on sentence. He discusses EVERYTHING with me from... racial issues, politics, religion, personal issues. And we contradict... ALL the time. But it's amazing because I feel so comfortable with him. I gave him a run for his money at first because he had been to jail before, he smokes weed, he's agnostic, he used to be involved in a gang and frankly I just didn't like him. But it's like he's gone through his own little renaissance. Anyway, even though we love each other, I've found it hard to break through that barrier with him because something had been holding me back. If you guys didn't know already, I was almost raped last summer by this jackbutt who was SUPPOSED to be like a brother to me and he kept physically, sexually, and emotionally abusing me from...mid october to the end of january. And I was so angry with myself because I allowed this to go on. I was scared in all honesty and I wasn't being smart. I was depressed and I even resorted to attempts at suicide because I was so miserable. But anyway, the love of my life and I have been having deep conversations lately and he's been frustrated because I don't trust him and he was angry because I lied to him about it. But we worked things out and as much hell as I put him through with my lies and emotional roller coasters he still held on to me. He's so amazing I can't even... he wants to marry me. I was like trick I didn't even graduate yet lol. And he said he'll wait for as long as possible. He hasn't even pressured me to have sex and is even willing to wait till marriage. I told him he's lying because guys NEED sex lol and he told me that he didn't fall in love with me for my body. CHA! lolNevertheless, I told off that jackbutt... last week and basically told him I wasn't taking any more crap from him. That I'm not scared of him just because he's in the latin kings and just because he has a gun doesn't mean he's all big and bad. And I told him that I want him out of my life forever. He left me alone for a week after that. But today he started doing his thing again and guys... I beat the sucka down. I didn't even realize it was me. I thought I was watching someone else but it was really me. And even though I got detention or whatever the teachers screamed I wasn't paying attention, I just feel so much better and justified. No, I didn't randomly acquire super strength and like... pummel him. But I basically damaged his jewels, gave him a black eye, bloody nose, and bruised his back. I'm sorry that he got hurt so bad but he had it coming. I've taken so much crap from this mothatrucka for so long without saying a word to ANYONE. I was lying to my own mother. Lying to my BF about my back hurting from "soccer" when really it was because he was slamming me against walls and lockers and abusing me. It's not like me to pick fights. I only aim to defend myself and fight when necessary.But I'm SO proud of myself for sticking up for me. Looking out for Abster, Astinator, Abitron, Abionidas, Abicules. lol I couldn't be more happy. I do feel bad... in a way. But it stops there. So while you may say "Abi! You beat someone up!" you should also be saying "bout damn time!" Technically I didn't "beat him up". It was self-defense...

The sh\*t-head got what he deserved! Big ups to you Abinator.
I hope "things looking up" is a reality for you.

Hey im glad you found someone that you really connect with. In some cases i think an age difference is needed to fill the maturity gap. As long as this guy is for real and he isnt just swooping in on younger pussy (Hate to put it that way but thats how it is here) then i say right on for you, and who cares about the age difference. If your relationship is based on connection, especially an intellectual connection that is great.As far as you beating the crap out of that guy, he HAD it COMING!! Seriously i dont think you did anything wrong and im glad you stuck up for yourself. I just hope the trouble doesnt interfere with graduation or anything.Good luck to you and i hope things continue to look up for you.

Good for you Abi.Watch your back, don't let the fucker sneak up on ya or try to get even or anything.Sorry, it's just the worrier in me.

Well good for you Abi!! Glad you stood up for yourself and put the guy in his place. Also, good to hear you found a good man hug

love and marriage,relationship problems, all fo that you read enough on here to know about, and its really on you in the end to decide whats right for you, so i shall avoid that area, however when it comes to beating some guy up, I do have this to say.
Good fucking job. Noone has to take someone elses shit. The only thing negative I have to say to you on that front, is that you should of done it the first time instead of 6 months later.

I know I'm not as awesome as these guys but let me offer you my congrats abi

Thanks so much guys I was supposed to "do my time" in school today but I discussed it over with the school counselor and since he's well-known in that school for his drug dealings they just let me off with a warning. I got off WAY easy with that one but... I'm not complaining lol.

That idiot had it coming. Watch out though for a retaliation (sp?). I hope you told your boyfriend about this incident.