Blaaah...

---

I'm so awkward tonight... I'm happy and sad at the same time. Like, I'm all happy because I'm gonna get lucky tonight, then, I'm sad because he is still claiming to be "straight"... Okay hun, we have been fooling around for 6 months now, it's time to admit to yourself you're not straight... I can understand curiosity. But come on... Any normal straight guy would be done with curiosity by now, don't you think?Sorry, I don't really have a question... I's just emotional right now, feeling awkward... Ranting.Maybe I do have a question.What should I do? I'm so confused...

I bet there are lots of guys who can't bear to think of themselves as anything other than straight.I suspect that pressing the matter will do no good. What he calls himself is mainly his own business.

He could be Bi or Pan.

Pansexual is where sex is just sex, you don't really care who gives it to you as long as it feels good. Might as well be called bi but meh

Yeah, especially because he is hispanic... And, I know how that has an effect on whether or not he has enough courage to come out. If he is gay or bi or whatever. I just don't fully understand what I, myself, should do with the whole situation...

Well, how do you feel about this situation? Did you want a relationship with him or is this purely just for the sexual thrill?What do you want from this guy?

I don't know that there is much you can do. If you give him an ultimatum "Come out or we're finished", you'll probably lose him. I suppose it depends on how tolerable you find the present situation.It may be that to admit to being gay or even bi might cause him ostracism or worse by parents, friends, employer, church . . .

I think about all you do is be empathetic and supportive to what he's going through while not discounting what you want out of the relationship. In other words you can be there for him but don't do it to an extent that your putting your want and need aside.

Well, the only reason I started doing things with him is because I had feelings for him, I'm generally not the type to sleep around or think only about the sexual aspects of a relationship. If I do become involved with a person it's because I feel something for the person as a whole, doesn't matter whether they are gay or straight. And if this person approaches me, well, I never know what to say, and ultimately give in to what they want, simply because I want to make them happy. In this case, he approached me, and I said okay... I know that he didn't intend a relationship other than that of a good fuck- For 6 months... And, every time we do something, I can feel myself liking him more and more. It's so stupid.I obviously want more- Obviously...I would never give him an ultimatum- I give them to myself though... But I am conflicted with this one.I care about him alot, put my schedule on hold for what he wants, I listen to him, help him through sticky situations, give him advice, there's nothing more I can do... I basically act like we are in a relationship- Like, a serious relationship. While I know he is free to do whatever he wants...It's just frustrating. And I'm being a little bitch. Sorry to waste your time.

Then I agree with Scotty.If you're getting your feelings hurt or feel the need to put them aside to make this guy happy, then it's time to call it quits. You said so yourself, you want more, a real relationship, but he doesn't.You can still be a good friend to him, but that's as far as it can go without having your feelings hurt. There's not much you can do to get him to turn around.

Since I have been with him, people have commented that he is changing... They don't say if it is a good change or bad change, and they don't say anything when I ask what they mean... I can read between the lines though.

And I can tell he cares about me, in his own way... It's just so weird...

If he's not going reciprocate in the feelings you have then all your doing is investing more and more of yourself in something that'll never happen and when it ultimately ends you'll be that much more hurt.You have the right to want and expect some one to address your needs and wants in a relationship. If he's unwilling to do that all your doing is opening yourself up to pain, I think.

Originally Posted By: Reen TarSince I have been with him, people have commented that he is changing... They don't say if it is a good change or bad change, and they don't say anything when I ask what they mean... I can read between the lines though.And I can tell he cares about me, in his own way... It's just so weird... But does that fulfill your needs? Your needs are just as important as his growth.

Okay, I think I know what I need to do. Well, it's obvious.Thankyou everyone... And, today is going to be sad, for both of us. He's going to lose a good fuck, and I'm going to lose him. Awesome! Let's get pumped!Awwh, omg, I'm starting to cry. XD Wow..By the way, Happy Birthday. XD

Thanks...Just do whats best for you.

Originally Posted By: OldFolks Originally Posted By: Reen TarSince I have been with him, people have commented that he is changing... They don't say if it is a good change or bad change, and they don't say anything when I ask what they mean... I can read between the lines though.And I can tell he cares about me, in his own way... It's just so weird... But does that fulfill your needs? Your needs are just as important as his growth. I always feel, that in time he can grow, and learn and all that... So I put my needs on hold, and he can repay them later on...

I don't see anything wrong with that but if it leaves you feeling like shit a lot of the time now is it worth it. Only you can answer that.How empty do you feel, or do you, after you all have sex and you want more and he doesn't. Is that emptiness worth it.Will he grow? If he does will he still be with you, will you still be with him?This has nothing to do with you and him it's just the perspective of age. Do you want to risk spending your youth on something that may never happen and limiting yourself to something that may never go anywhere? My greatest regrets are the doors I didn't open for the perception of permanence that wasn't.Only you know what you want and how you feel. My only advise is in the end do what best for you and provides you with what you need.

The illusion of permanence can be seen in anything. Doesn't matter how old you are... When I am with him I feel happy... It's like.. Fresh love, you know? It's new and exciting. All you want to do is explore your boundaries... I am happy, I'm just really confused. And, seeing as how nobody else is interested in me, I say, "Why not?" and go with him. I know that eventually it will end, and I will most likely be hurt. But you need to feel something to grow yourself, am I right?

What is it you want from him? Or do you want anything more from him?...And yeah I think your right in what you said.

Well, I do want more... But where does that end? People always want more...

It ends where people wants are reasonable. Is what you want reasonable?I've gotta take off, talk to ya later.