We've been dating for a little over 3 years. From highschool into college. We shared the same friends througout and we were great together. She came to me in January and basically told me she wasn't happy. I haven't been the good boyfriend i had been, mostly because i shifted my focus from entirely on her to her and college (I have a hard major). She also said that she felt "something was missing" from the relationship, she didn't know what. She said that she loved and cared about me more than ill ever know.
So we talked and worked things out. I went above and beyond to fix my flaws, and no I did not get obsessive. Then recently she says she needs to talk to me and says she's been feeling the same thing again, and that i've been perfect throughout but she feels like its not fair to be with me if she's not 100% in it, but she doesn't know whats wrong. She's unhappy and she doesn't know why. Her family consists of a million sisters with a mother and no father, and all of their relationships are, in a way, really F'ed up. We definately have the best relationship of them all, but part of me feels like its something mental that she's grown up watching them.
She I told her i'd give her the space, which has been really really hard. But i'm just getting confused because everyone is basically telling me that i'm supposed to not contact her and make her miss me by acting great and as if nothing is bothering me. But she was crying her eyes out when she did this, she didn't want to do this but she feels like its unfair to me to be in a relationship with me if shes not all in. I can tell she didn't want the space, but she feels like it was necessary.
What i dont get is, she's texting me all the time because she says she wants to talk to me. I dont understnad how that is giving her space. And I cant just ingore the texts because I dont want her to think I dont care about her anymore and im honestly too nice of a person to blow them off. So i wrote back asking her to stop worrying about me, she goes its her job to worry about me, and then i tell her that i'm trying to figure this whole space thing out (its the first time ive gone through this) ... then she drops the bomb ... "the more space i push for, the more I try to talk to you" ... I dont know what that means or what to do with that .. I ask her what that means and she tells me she can't stop herself from contacting me ...
I really dont know what to do or go about this. The whole space thing just seems wrong. I know everyone says that, but the way she cried when she told me, there is clearly something there for us.