Let me just explain what the hell I am going through. Have you ever seen The Matrix? If you have, then you will understand what I am about to say. I feel like I am slowly being pulled out of The Matrix (a fake reality) and starting to realize the truth. I was diagnosed with GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) and Manic Depression along with Attention Deficit Disorder. For a long time I took Zoloft, Abilify, and Focalin. I decided to quit taking the medicine. Since then, I feel much better. But back to what I was saying. It's really hard to see the whole picture since you have no idea how people perceive you, but I always felt that people viewed me significantly different from most people and consequently treated me differently. I used to think it was me. I thought I was doing something wrong. This was the foundation of my anxiety. I finally realized that nothing is wrong with me. If anything, something is wrong with the people who treat me differently than everyone else. I'm starting to realize the truth. A lot of people are mean, apathetic, and selfish. I consider myself to be selfless, caring, and nice, but cynical because the former people surround me. I found that is very rare to find someone who is similar to me. That's when I stop being cynical, and start opening up to those who I feel actually have a soul and heart left. I wish I could just go to a land where everyone is like this. Jamaica, perhaps? I feel like the environment around me is corrupting my heart and soul and I am fighting it. My goal is to defeat the corruption that has already happened to me, and I feel like I am doing a good job of that. I'm slowly eliminating all of the negative influences in my life (soulless music, heartless people, drugs) and inserting positive influences into my life (soulful music, caring individuals).With that said, I really want to influence some of my corrupted friends to fight this corruption. I know it will be hard without coming off as narcissistic to them. What should I do?
What to do, what to do...
This worries me, because often when people find their opinion of the rest of the world changing, it's because their own perception is beginning to distort.It's always practically impossible to compare yourself to other people, because you see yourself from the inside and other people from the outside. Let others be how they choose, and you be how you choose.