Ex-Boyfriend Blues

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I was just wondering if anyone had any advice for me and my situation. I've dated the same guy on and off for several years, and the last time we started dating we decided that we would get married. He gave me a 'promise ring' and told me that we were going to get married after graduation and filled my head with all of these lies. I believed him and I really wanted to marry the guy, but he decided he wasn't ready. He was the first guy I ever kissed and he was the first guy I ever said "I love you" to. What really pisses me off was that while we were dating, he was being charged with a crime that never happened, and I stood by his side the whole time. None of his so called friends wanted to be around him but I did. I had faith in him and I fell in love with him. When the charges were proven false he dumped me and gave the famous lines "It's not you, it's me.... I think we should just be friends for right now" I was there for him in his time of need, but he left when I needed him most (I found out a week after he left my mothers doctors thought they had found cancer in her lungs) . We didn't speak to each other for nearly six months and now we are. We've become very close again and he acts like wants to be more again, but I don't think I can go through what he did to me again. What should I do? I need someones help....

My advice is to stay away from this guy. When you fall in love with someone it's hard to keep yourself from feeling something for them again. Moving on is your best bet.

I suggest the same thing. It's going to hurt saying no to him or even being around him. I've been there were an engagement was broken off. It hurts like a bitch and even though you still love this guy you got to move on. You've been through a lot of drama with this guy and you just need to figure out if being with him is in your best intrest and if these issues would come up again.

It's really hard to try and not talk to him or see him because 'we' live in a very small town. You know, the kind of place where everyone knows everybody and you can't sneeze without everyone knowing about it five minutes later (a little exageration, but not much ^_^) I see him almost every day and I have to talk to him, but I really don't want to. It hurts very much and I've even considered diving into another relationship just to take my mind off of him. But I wouldn't want to hurt anyone else... I just guess I'm going to have to completely cut myself off from him.... but how??   

Practically thinking, you probably CAN'T cut yourself from him entirely if you do indeed live in such a small town, but don't fall for his tricks again. The only thing you have to predict his future is his past - and he hurt you badly in it, so don't be to quick to think he's changed.So what do you do if you can't cut yourself off? I'm assuming you're not in the situation where you can just take a Private Jet to New York and start anew, so you need to let him know how you feel. That doesn't (necessarily) mean saying "I want to let you know how I feel: I think you smell". You can do it simply by walking PAST him at the supermarket with just a brief smile and keep going. If he starts up a conversation, say you really don't have time to talk. DON'T say you'll catch up later - just leave it at "I can't talk" and go on your way.The worst thing that could happen is that you fall for this guy again and he just screws you as he did before.All the best!

Today I actually saw my ex as he really is and not as I made him out to be for so long. He showed his true colors and believe me, they're not very flattering. I just realized hes a little boy playing at a mans game and that he'll never grow up. He thinks the world is out to get him and everything that happens to him is everyone elses fault but his own. It's quiet pathetic, and it saddens me to know that I've wasted so much time and effort on such a self-centered person who neither cares about me or anyone else but himself. I'm glad that I found out now rather than a few months or even a year down the road. I still love him deeply, but I know I can get through this, and that I'll be able to move on sometime.

Thanks for listening to me guys, you're advice is really appreciated. ^_^

Cut your loses and move on to someone that is worthy of your affections. Be thankful he didn't waist more of your time. Be happy with yourself knowing you did the right thing, you're a good person, and you can find a good man now that he's out of your way. I mean really he did you a favor. It may take a while to see that, but I think everyone else here can see it. You didn’t use my directions from that other post to give that looser a bj did you? He would deserve such a good one. lol

Oh no! I've never done anything sexual, I think that type of stuff is ment for someone special. I concidered it once, but I'm glad I never did. He has proven he was never even worth the thought.

good for you for seeing him for what he is before you made a huge mistake. never forget this lesson! there's plenty of time to get married, and you should take it to really, really get to know a person. jerks can only keep up the game so long, and then they show their true colors.

And when they show their colors pay attention. So many females make excuses for what their guy is doing. A jerk is a jerk is a jerk. Sweet guys do sweet things all the time. Not just sometimes.

He came into my store yesterday, and he decided that we just had to talk. Do you know what he asked me? He asked me why I wasn't wearing 'his' ring anymore? Wear his ring?!? Is he fucking crazy?!? I told him that 1) I had no reason to wear it anymore 2) It's not any of his buisness what I do with the ring anymore and 3) There is nothing between us so I don't need to wear it nor do I have the desire to wear it. Well that pissed him off so he started getting all huffy and puffy and complaining about me being rude to him about it. I finially just said "You know what, there is nothing between us, and there never will be again in that way. I get that... and believe me, I don't want it. Maybe we can be friends sometime down the road, but not now. Go away. Don't call me, e-mail me, nothing, just go away." (Of course I cleaned up that part a bit ^_^) He got pissed and went and got into his truck and took off. It felt so good to finally stand up and tell him what I thought. Thanks for all your advice, it has helped me more than you guys will ever know. ^_^

Good For You!!!!!!!!!

Okay the little dick is starting to get on my nerves! His sorry ass just called my house not even 5 minutes ago to ask me why I haven't been calling him growls Where the hell does he get the nerve to call me and ask me to be there for him when he was never there for me. He wants me to come over and help him record a message on his answering maschine... what the hell? I'm not going to stop my day just so I can say Merry Christmas on his damn answering machine for his cell. Thats bs. Can't he get the hint? I don't want to talk to him at all...

Next time he calls tell him if he ever calls your house or shows up at your work you will call the police and file charges for harassment.
And if does still bother you do it.