It all started when I was I child or on my teenage years, I started wearing my mom's pantyhoses just for the plesure of it. Then I discovered that I could also wear her high heels and it was wonderful. Time passed and every time I was home alone I would run to my moms drawers and get her pantyhoses, put them on and also the shoes, I would stand in front of the mirror and rub my legs to feel the smoothness of the material, this would give such amount of pleasure that it would make me feel like I was coming, in fact, I think I came many times but since I was still a child I would ejaculate only waterish sperm. Time passed and I continued growing, until I discover that I could also wear my sisters panties and hosery, shoes, dresses, etc. It was amazing, so pleasurable, then came the make up and I could even swear that I looked very hot that any teenage boy would fall in love with me. Years passed, now I am 30, happily married for more than 10 year and with 2 kids, during the years I continue with my behavior until my wife kind of found out .(well she knew a little about my thing but she was not 100% ok w/it). I have been able to make my wife to believe that I do it because I am a very sensual person and that it just makes very horny. I have even shaved my legs and my body with the excuse that I want to feel her skin better while making love to her. (She bought it...), but that wasnot the real true, the true is that I wanted to wear my sexy stockings, high heel, her mini skirts and sexy blouses and my wig (yes, I even got I wig) and fantasize I was a very sexy woman. That would give me such a tremendous amount of pleasure that I would jerk off and come in gallons of sperm... which would leave so exhausted. During the years, I started discovering websites on the internet until one day I found a wbesite about shemales-transexuals, I was totally hooked. That, became my hobby, everytime I would be home alone, I would wear my sexy clothing and log on the internet and search for shemales. I would even start to date guys thru AOL and give blowjobs. Those days were so exciting (my kids werent born yet). The weird thing is that I would feel so guilty w/myself that it everytime after I did it, I would promise to myself that I will never going to do it again. Years passed and my wife and I had our kids, and that made stop doing the girly things for about 2 -3 years, but the urge would return and would go back to the websites and sexy clothings (no more dating though). I could go forever with my story but to make it short, I have been dressing againg wile nobody is home and masturbating while looking at all my "special girls" thinking I am one of them, I have even bought a vibrator and had tried to pleasured me for a couple of times (didnot like it). I have shaved my legs and I have proposed to my wife to both wear stockins and make love. She is not too convinced about it, but she is willling to do it. I have never had any anal intercourse with no men,even when I did the AOL dating thing, it was never my intention to have anal sex, I would even put it in my profile, I only wanted to feel like a shemale sucking her lover's dick. My question to you after giving you the history of my life in a nutshell is: Why did I develop this behavior? Am I gay? (even though I don't like man).. Why am I so obssesed with shemales and me wearing paintes, high heels, stocking and sexy clothes? Please, can abybody explain my behavior?ThanksJ
-
I reall need a response to my questions
-
why ? maybe childhood trauma ?gay? no. it
s sumthinelse , but its escaping me now . ill post later when i remember -
Please, don't forget me... I need to know....
-
Ok, you sound as though you may be bi-sexual. That’s not gay. Cross-dressing is a common fetish too. Do you feel that you are a woman trapped in a man’s body or is just about some fantasy role-playing?I’m glad to hear that you stopped “dating”. That’s a one-way trip to divorce.In my opinion, what you do as part of your masturbation rituals is just your thing. I’m not going to criticize it. Just remember you obligation to your family.
-
In reply to:Why did I develop this behavior?It's a very common fetish and you just really like it. Kinda like how you really like woman.In reply to:Am I gay?I doubt it. The only reason you gave a guy a BJ is because it took your fetish further. You may be Bi or you just may not care when you get horny.In reply to:Why am I so obssesed with shemales and me wearing paintes, high heels, stocking and sexy clothes?Like I said its a very common fetish for men(and women) to cross dress. And Shemals are kinda like you are, in sexy womens clothing, so you can relate to them and it can kinda make it more sexier. Or you like them alot since you want to look like them(I guess you do). And like mentioned before you may be a woman trapped in a mans body.
