Hey folks. Just wondering what your reactions have been when or if for that matter, you meet a stutterer. Why? Because I am one. I don't stutter that much, but I still do. It's a disorder I've always had. I'm trying to deal with the situation now by therapy, but I'm curious to know what others think. I haven't had much luck with picking up girls, I can tell you that much. I don't blame everything on my stuttering though, perhaps it was my mannerism, or my looks. It's a lot tougher for me since I'm of a minority race and my looks aren't on the good side, if you get my drift. Other than that, I think I'm confident in myself and I consider myself a good person... reading by some of the posts here, I guess I would be considered a "goody goody."Just wondering what you guys think. Thanks!
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Your Reactions Towards a Stutterer
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Hey, I can't see why anyone would have a problem with anyone who has disorders of some kind. When I went karate, one of my friends there stuttered, it was girl, but she always was going out with guys and was popular and all that. As for getting girls, I haven't had the greatest success, but I think you have to be confident But no, I can't see why people would think any differently of you because of some disorder
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There was a guy in my high school that stuttered. I don't know if it was only this bad when talking to females, cuz I never talked to him as anything other than a female, but he had the clicking and all. Nice guy. I was a freshman and he was an upperclassman, so I didn't get to talk to him much.What is surprising is that I normally finish people sentences for them if they are taking too long (patience is not my middle name. And I can't tell you how POed teachers get when you do that to them. lol) But I never did it to him. I don't know why. Maybe even as thick as I can be sometimes I wasn't thick enough to not know that would be rude and mean. ) But I wouldn’t off hand give myself that much credit.But to answer the question, I think the same of them as I think of everyone else. It’s not like they are different or something.
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One of my life long friends stutter. It doesn't bother me at all. Although, after hanging out with him long enough I start to stutter myself. heheh.
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I have no problems with it, I tend to stutter a few times myself. I don't think many mature adults have issues with it, as long as it's comprehensible to some degree, maybe like a slight to moderate stutter, not severe like Ozzy Osbourne. I know a lot of children tended to make fun of a stutterer, simply because it was weird, and I think they thought he could simply control it, but chose not to, which isn't really the case.
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Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to everyone! Anywho, thanks for the positive feedback. Yeah, a lot of people don't seem to have a problem. Friends and family treat me well. It's just that picking up girls, when I stutter, especially my name (which I do it severely), I have received some very bad responses. I see this awe in their face, and been treated like a weirdo even a times. Also been treated nicely, but as if I was mentally challenged and what not. Not encouraging to say the least. My friends say I have a good personality, am trusting, caring, etc.. but they were traits that they have learned about me by giving me a chance and getting to know me. When you try to pick someone up, you have to somehow earn that chance first... for me at least, to oversee the stutter. I still keep a positive attitude about this though. I know that a lot of people don't know much about the disorder and I know for a fact it's a turn off for most. Don't get me wrong, being friends with a stutterer is one thing, but having or trying to initiate a date/relationship with a stutterer is different matter. I say all this out of personal experience. I know you guys are giving me a point of view from a non-stutterer's point of view, which is what I asked.
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Think of it as a positive. You are cutting through a lot of crappy chicks really quickly. If they are so shallow and what not you don't really want them anyway and they're saving you the time of learning that the hard way.
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Out of curiosity, what race are you? You mentioned you're a minority, and I am aswell, so I was wondering.Concering the stuttering: I agree with everyone else with their views. One of my good friends stutters and it's just something you accept and never think about. I don't find it to be a big deal. As far as stuttering worse around girls, hey, even guys without disorders tend to stutter when they are nervous or around a girl they like. Just yesterday I was walking with a guy who likes me, and he stuttered so badly. Like ilikekisses mentioned, you're eliminating all the bad chicks anyway.
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Think of it as a positive. You are cutting through a lot of crappy chicks really quickly. If they are so shallow and what not you don't really want them anyway and they're saving you the time of learning that the hard way.
Yep, I agree! I just question myself that more than 95% of the girls I meet can't be all bad, you know? I've posted a question similar to this on other forums and I've gotten positive responses, which is good. However, this response almost never carries over in real life.
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Out of curiosity, what race are you? You mentioned you're a minority, and I am aswell, so I was wondering.
I'm Spanish with some Asian. I live, work, and have been brought up always in a white neighborhood. Because of this, I have a preference to like whites, but it's not really in sync to what my race is, you know? :smile:
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Concering the stuttering: I agree with everyone else with their views. One of my good friends stutters and it's just something you accept and never think about. I don't find it to be a big deal
Yeap, I got no problems making friends really. Starting a relationship is more difficult. I've been told by many girls the typical, "oh you're such a great guy" or "you're so funny, you make me laugh/smile all the time" or "any girl would love to have you as their man" - of course it's anyone else BUT them. I don't hold anything agaisnt them though. I'm not going to blame anyone for not being liked "that" way. I mean, sure, it hurts sometimes, but brush it off and keep a positive attitude always like many of you have suggested.
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As far as stuttering worse around girls, hey, even guys without disorders tend to stutter when they are nervous or around a girl they like. Just yesterday I was walking with a guy who likes me, and he stuttered so badly. Like ilikekisses mentioned, you're eliminating all the bad chicks anyway.
Yeah, I hear you, but that's really different I think. I believe that type of stuttering is generally more accepted - people know overall, I think, that even the most fluent person will stutter or trip over a word once in a while while talking. Someone with the disorder though, you actually see a spasm effect, their adam's apple sometimes throbs forcefully depending on the severity. One of the worse feelings for a stutterer is when the other person looks at you in awe, wondering what's wrong with you and giving you sympathy for it. I used to be like that- I used to feel that, but I've learned to deal with it by just trying to remain positive.
Thanks again for all the responses! :sunglasses: I like hearing from people from different forum communities. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
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I know its stupid, but look at Gareth Gates, he stuttered and he had one of the largest fan bases in the country for a while... btw, I'm english so if you don't know who he is then.. he was a pop star who won a national competition to be one. lol.
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It definitely is an inspiration when stutterers break the barriers and become successful. Like Marilyn Monroe, Bruce Willis, Julia Roberts, James Earl Jones, and Samuel L. Jackson, to name a few. I just wish they came out and encouraged other stutterers in some positive way. I've never heard of anyone successful like those do anything, which is a shame.
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I'm a lurker around here, but I thought I would come out of the woodwork to reply to this thread.I am a stutterer myself, and I'm also not really a ladies' man, but I can tell you that the few girls I have dated say it doesn't matter. If it helps you, think about it like this: any girl who won't associate herself with you because you stutter is a girl you wouldn't want to date anyway. It's kind of nifty that way!In reply to:It's just that picking up girls, when I stutter, especially my name (which I do it severely), I have received some very bad responses.That's odd, I really have trouble introducing myself too. Talk about a bad first impression! I've worried about it too, and I haven't really come up with a good solution for it. My typical techniques for dodging a stutter are word substitution or pretending I don't know an answer, but neither of these work well when asked your name!! I think some of my friends have figured this out, though, and they'll sometimes introduce me to people. I hate it when people finish my sentences, but, boy, I wish they would introduce me more!In reply to:Also been treated nicely, but as if I was mentally challenged and what not.Heh I get that too. Just wondering, but are you considered especially intelligent? I was working one day, and one of the customers, upon noticing I stuttered, immediately asked me if I was considered highly intelligent. I guess that I am (if you trust standardized tests to tell you who's smart) and she seemed like this was normal; she had the notion that everyone who stutters is smart and I was just wondering if that is true for you too.In reply to:One of my life long friends stutter. It doesn't bother me at all. Although, after hanging out with him long enough I start to stutter myself.The direct cause of stuttering is unknown, but from what I've read, it is possible to inhereit a stutter genetically as well as environmentally. If you listen to your friend enough, and if you try to immitate his speech, you will become a stutterer yourself! There was a study done at the University of Iowa that concluded this result, but unfortunately the process is irreversible.In reply to:I just question myself that more than 95% of the girls I meet can't be all bad, you know?They probably can be. Most girls my age are looking for buff guys; I dunno what age you are, but if you're a kid like I am, I bet you're just not on the menu right now. When the women start looking for productive husband-type men, then you'll get hooked up.In reply to:James Earl JonesThe first time I heard that I just couldn't get the idea of Darth Vader stuttering out of my head! Now that you mention it, I guess I haven't heard of him doing anything motivational.In reply to:I'm trying to deal with the situation now by therapy,Pshh, let me know if that works I could quote you therapists' techniques for curbing stuttering, but none of them work if they don't become a part of your habit of speaking. My stutter has gotten better as I aged (some people just grow out of it), but not everyone is like that. Others (like James Earl Jones) can just decide, "I'm tired of this" and can successfully quit with mental discipline. I've been throught the therapist stuff, and it didn't really help me, but I hope it helps you! Good luck!
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I think some of my friends have figured this out, though, and they'll sometimes introduce me to people. I hate it when people finish my sentences, but, boy, I wish they would introduce me more!
Ditto. People try to be courtious by doing this but don't know it may annoy a stutter. It's like saying "you're not capable of finishing this thought so I'm going to finish it for you." It's annoying, but then again, many people don't know it's annoying for a stutterer, so it's ok. I let it slide. =) (It still annoys me a little bit though.)
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Heh I get that too. Just wondering, but are you considered especially intelligent?
Well, I've been told by a lot of people that I was, and I have heard that stutterers are usually considered above intelligence. However, I have not seen any scientific evidence on the subject. I think though, for the most part, they have to be a little wiser since they spend less social time, and use that time to reflect over their problems and become more knowledgeable about it. They have to learn more about whatever it is they do to overcome the stutter and sort of "make up for it" by being skilled in something else. Also have to deal with and cope with all the stereotype we get all the time.
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The direct cause of stuttering is unknown, but from what I've read, it is possible to inhereit a stutter genetically as well as environmentally
Genetically, yes, I've heard that. Enviromentally? Can you post the source for it? I've never heard of it picking it up like that. I'd be very interested to read up more on it.
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They probably can be. Most girls my age are looking for buff guys; I dunno what age you are, but if you're a kid like I am, I bet you're just not on the menu right now. When the women start looking for productive husband-type men, then you'll get hooked up.
I'm in my mid 20's. I find a lot of girls that have great personalities all the time. Being friends is no problem... but they're taken already. Hehe.
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The first time I heard that I just couldn't get the idea of Darth Vader stuttering out of my head! Now that you mention it, I guess I haven't heard of him doing anything motivational.
Yeah, hehe. He's a stutterer. He actually played the role of a stutterer in a movie. I forgot which. I'm sure you can look it up on imdb.com.
I'll let you know how the therapy goes. Thanks for the response!
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One of my life long friends stutter. It doesn't bother me at all. Although, after hanging out with him long enough I start to stutter myself. heheh.
I have a very good friend that stutters, and when I'm around her for long periods of time I start doing it too! Of course I stutter when I'm overly excited and it makes it worse when I'm hanging out with her lol (I also have another friend, Aaron, who does it and it makes him look so cute and hes so sweet....).There is nothing wrong with a person stuttering, I find it quiet cute when a guy does it. Nothing wrong with it, it's just another thing that makes you 'you'
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not a problem whatsoever
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In reply to:Can you post the source for it? I've never heard of it picking it up like that. I'd be very interested to read up more on it. I looked it up again, and I found some info on it. After reading it over, however, the experiment seems quite barbaric, and I should probably retract my previous statement: the study concluded that people can be made to stutter, but the methods used were much more severe than just listening to other people who stutter. Here's a site with some info on the experiment: http://www.ahrp.org/infomail/0601/11.php
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i think stutterer's should be put onto an island alongwith criminals and minoritys!
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Maybe people who can't write English correctly should be put onto an island along with all the retards! It's stutterers; no apostrophe is necessary. Thanks for the troll, ass.
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In reply to: Maybe people who can't write English correctly should be put onto an island along with all the retards! It's stutterers; no apostrophe is necessary. Thanks for the troll, ass BAM! good one!
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Thanks for all the feedback guys! I really do appreciate it!In reply to:i think stutterer's should be put onto an island alongwith criminals and minoritys!I'm down with that if people like you are burned alive.