Hey im new to the forum(long time lurker)finially decided to post somthing that i need ALot of advice on. Theres this girl i really like and she likes me alot too. The problem is i am very shy,quiet,or whatever you want to call it. And when we talk on the phone or in person most of the talking is done by her. i have alot of trouble starting the conversation or continuing one. when shes done talking all that comes out of my mouth is "oh" or i laugh. My mind just goes blank. then theres usally a long pause of silence then she starts talking again and then same thing happens. Can anyone offer me any advice?
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Talking To A Girl
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pinkfloyd77,There is nothing to be shy about. If you know she likes you, then what are you worrying about? She must like you for who you are and not what you are going to say next. Heck, maybe she even likes your shyness. Ya gotta loosen up. I think you're too tense around her and you are thinking too much. Girls are human beings too. They eat, sleep, laugh, joke, fart, and belch like guys do. Get over the fact that she's a goddess and start talking already! With time, talking to girls will become easier and come naturally to you.Dr.SL
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From a female's perspective, we are humans too. Although I think its cute when a guy is shy around me, there comes a time when its annoying to get one word replies after carrying most of the conversation. I would suggest that you stop thinking so much, just let it flow. Imagine that she's just an ordinary person(which, by the way, she is, lol) and respond accordingly. As far as starting a conversation goes, start off with simple things; school, work, family, pets, mutual friends, movies, music, anything. The conversation should flow nicely from one subject to another.Things will get better with time, but there will always be brain farts. I've been with me bf for 3 years, and we still have moments of awkward silence. We usually laugh about it, or he'll say crickets. Maybe when a long pause happens, you could joke about how awkward it is.
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It's very possible that she likes you because you let her do the talking. A lot of girls like listeners. But you can't just be one thing for too long or else she'll get bored with you and look elsewhere. Now that would be some crap.I can usually keep a conversation going without any awkward moments by asking questions or joking around. Sometimes a girl will say to me, "you ask a lot of questions." A simple reply of, "well, I just want to get to know you" will almost always get you brownie points. Another thing is if she's telling a story about something then after she's done you can tell a story about yourself to let her know that you've had a similar experience and therefore can relate. Female's love it when a guy can understand where they're coming from and how they understand it. One more thing for now, that is don't lie. One lie can really hinder your ability to be fluid and make sense. So avoid the lies.