i have a really bad jealousy issue that i want to fix. i have never been a jealous person i have never had problems with previous guys ive dated to hang out with chicks alone and go out to clubs, look at porn, talk to chicks, check them out, tell me about chicks they thought were hot, hanging with ex girlfriends etc. my new relationship is awesome and i love him so much but now im OVERWHELMED with jealousy. another thing thats new is i have always been a sweet fun happy person but since i have felt my first feeling of jealousy i have become moody, bitchy, nagging, clingy, paranoid, and the list goes on. this is not me at all i hate feeling this way and i know that this will break my relationship up if i do not fix this problem. now when my boyfriend checks out other chicks (which includes online-porn chats looking at chick profiles etc, when he looks at them in person(when were outside in stores etc) and on tv and in magazines. ive already told him how i feel but he says he doesnt do it consiously and that he has a fascintation with the female body which i know how that is cuz im the same way with guys and always have been but i control it now and have found strategies to make sure i dont even look anymore because i know how it feels when he looks . but even talking to him he still does it and its not right for me to tell him not to so i wont but everytime he does im overcome with stomache PAIN so freaking painful and then the pain moves to my heart then my brain and i want to scream and then i get bitchy and angry and i want this feeling to stop. i dont want to feel angry anymore its made me bitchy all the time my whole personality has changed along with my sense of humor. i need advice for getting over this..any help would be so appreciative..i dont want my relationship to fail cuz i cant get over him looking or having any affiliation with chicks.background info...i have been cheated on with other guys and lied to so im sure this has to do with it since with them i never had jealousy and didnt care about them being around ex's and hanging out with other chicks. my mom has been cheated on also which im sure doesnt help my new fears. i honestly dont believe he would cheat on me so thats not the problem. its what i stated at the top. and its hard to find a time when chicks arent around. our society is male based so everywhere are chicks, titty bars, porn, sexy chicks in mags and in movies and so on and so forth so i really need advice for this to end cuz its everywhere so i feel it all the time. thank you
Are you maybe insecure with yourself? I mean if you were confident in yourself right now you wouldn't feel so angry when he might look at other females. It's hard b/c I think it's easy for a girl to stop looking at other men when they've found the right one b/c men are not generally as attractive as females, but b/c guys have such a wide and various selection of women to choose from, they can't help but look. Maybe you've just found someone that really intrigues you and do you feel like maybe he's better than you in some way. That could be a good reason why you feel insecure.