Hi, first of all this post is about a friend I have had since my freshman year in highskool, she is an awesome person and i lover her to death but there is one thing that bothers me but i can do nothing about. When she was 13 and before i met her she had sex with a 35 yr. old man. He was sentenced to 7 years in prison but that is besides the point. Ever since that she has had sex with 5 different men. I know this because she tells me and I know she is not lying. They are all over 18 exdept for one of the guys. She is only 16 years old and she is already "premiscuous". I feel bad that she has to resort to getting attention that way because she does not get good attention from her family, only negative. Her dad left her when she was 2 to live with her mom only and i know that is one of the factors. She subconsciously feels like she needs acceptance from older men or is looking for a "father figure". i feel bad for her and she is rarely careful about using condoms. 2 of these guys she had sex with was when she was with her 23 year old boyfriend......i know i can't get her to stop because it is her decision but i want her to stop doing that to herself. BTW she has never had a orgasm with any of these men, she told me, and i know she isnt doing it cause it feels good, it only feels good to her that she is getting acceptance from these men........anybody have any advice on how to talk to her to get across that that is dangerous........responses would be appreciated:)
I'm very worried
Maybe you can tell her that trhese men aren't trustworthy, and for all she knows can be another Ted Bundy (mass murderer), the dangers of the unprotected sex she's having and them being older with more expierience that she can contract AIDS and would die, or simply what you told us. Hearing it in real, blunt words may strike some sense into her, and tell her if she starts doing people who are her age and super horny she'll probably have that orgasm she wants. Also, if that doesn't work, their are some peopke out there who could help and make her feel accepted (Psychiatrists, Therapists, Support Groups, Someone who did what she's doing and regrets it). Other than that, I guess you'll have to await more advice OR live with it. Personally, I'd do the above (The helping part, not live with it) because like that campaign says, "Real Friends Don't Let Friends Do Drugs" and if she can contract HIV/AIDS, it's just as bad. Sometimes to be a good friend you just have to push and shove.
You ain't going to like to hear this but she's doom man, and theirs nothing you can do about it. She is going to be fucked up for her whole life, into and out of bad relationships her whole life, guarante-goddammed-teed. It’s too bad, many women out there just like that.