Help!

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so on friday i met this amazing girl at my schools formal dance, i drank a litre of this purple water/wax stuff that was on the table making the candles float as a joke and apparently that got her attention enough that we spent the rest of the night dancing or sitting together (at least while i wasnt in the bathroom throwing up cus of it lol...) we get msn addresses and then valentines day comes along and i walk over to her school which is down the street to me give her some chocolates... i really think she likes me wootwoot later that day we plan to watch some movies, suggested at the dance i get rocky horror cus i didnt know how to do the "time warp", i also pick up donny darko cus i never seen it... i go to her place and since her parents are using the tv downstairs they suggest we use the one in their bedroom,so were watching these movies on their parents bed, im really happy and having lots of fun just being there, we kinda hold hands/fiddle with each others hands/feet, then i think it was during the second movie donny darko i made a few comments on how its never that easy when two people meet to have that first kiss... we were real close and she actually kisses me! my first kiss, i must say i think i screwed it up a bit but idk, i felt clumsy myself and im hoping that didnt turn her off, it was nice though to feel that close to someone, at 10pm her father yells up the stairs saying its time to go since tomorrow is a school day... we kiss once more infront of the tv as im getting ready to go, just a gentle lip to lip kiss...the door to the parents room was open the entire time, and i think it was possible for him to see from the downstairs couch actually right up infront of the tv ...i call up my mommy to drive me home and i stand there kinda playing with their puppy, totally not looking at her father - did he see me kiss his daughter? i leave, with this new feeling of happiness, my mother tries to ask a million questions on the way home which i disregard... then the next day i talk to the girl on msn, "how are ya doing" i say... she says "bad, cus my dad doesnt want me dating..." my heart shatters...im not sure if im being a bad person or something but i really liked this girl and the feeling of closeness just being with her i had was the best feeling in my life, maybe her dad just doesnt like me? she says we can still be friends, which i would love to do, but it still hurts when i kind of really was looking forward to having a close, intimate relationship, i dont mean like sex or anything, kissing isnt even all of it, just holding hands, hugging, being close, things you dont usually get from a friend...maybe im being selfish or something wanting so much?i just really dont know what to do, ive never had a girlfriend until that one day... now im just at a loss, im 17, shes 16, grade 12 and grade 11, i dont understand her father... being protective i guess? apparently after highschool for her is when its okay for her to start dating and stuff, im taking another year of highschool, even have the option of going to her school, but again, i dont know what to do...please help me...

What ever happened to teenage rebellion?? Usually when parents tell their children not to do something, the child pretty much does it anyway. So she'll probably continue to see you anyways....unless she does want to date you and made that excuse up.

She lives down the street but you got a lift back from your mom? Sorry, not the point...I agree with MizzDakota, be rebelious! Talk to her about it, ask her if she is willing to give it a go, her dad can't control everything, you have school! If school is good for just one thing, its getting away from parents!Go for it! It could turn out to be the greatest thing you've ever done!

Whoa man, strict parents bro. Im 13 and I kiss people infront of my parents all the time. And called your parents? whoa.haha jp dude, look, if you care about her and she cares about you I think it doesn't mattrer what he thinks [ her father ]. I think you should just date her, walk her home from school, or drive her [ if you have a car..? ].Good luck with her dude..

Well if she kissed you and held hands with you I'm pretty sure she likes you. I understand your point of view but you've also got to look at it from her dad's as well. Maybe hes not ready for his little girl to be all grown up (my dad is the same way lol) I mean my Dad is always telling me that I'm not allowed to date until I'm married and that I can't get married until I'm 46 and I'm 18 going on 19 (go figure), so maybe her dad is just trying to protect his baby. But regardless, if you two like one another, I say go for it. Don't give up one something just because someone said you counldn't do it, go for it and I wish you the best of luck.

Although that is true, its her life, not his. Her dad has to let her make her own decisions.

In reply to: its her life, not his. Her dad has to let her make her own decisions. I agree that he needs to let her make "her" own decisions, but you have to look at it from his point of view, that is his daughter and I'm sure that he just wants to protect her, expesually(ms?) because the way the world is today... it's pretty dangerous out there. I agree with HelmsmaN, get to know her parents, be a good friend, hang out at her house, prove to them them that your intentions with their daughter are good, and then maybe you guys will be able to date. But don't push it because then she may not be allowed to see you at all, and I doubt that you'd like that.

Yes, but he has to realise that he must let her free some time. Yes, some parents give there kids too much freedom and it leads down a nasty path, but it can be just as bad to try to overprotect them. By not letting her live in the world, he may be doing more damage than he could know.

Sorry, I have a habit of going off topic.

I am agreeing with the conservative approach. Just yesterday, a fellow nurse was explaining what it was like for her bf to ask her to marry him, her being 32 and him being 37. He totally had to ask her dad permission and if he had 'concerns'... The dad of my friend is in his 70's so they felt they had to do it as it was done in his generation out of respect.

Do this. Be her friend, and maybe you will end up with an opportunity to ask her dad's 'permission' to date his daughter and find out what his 'concerns' are. The show of respect will win you major points.

K

Parents who stop their children dating do not always have their best interests in mind. My wife's great-uncle always stopped his daughter going out with anyone. The reason was that he was a widower and he wanted his daughter to look after him. It worked - she did, and he lived until his late nineties, the last 15 years or so with advanced Altzheimer's. She looked after him all that time; by the time he finally died she was about 60 and had given up her whole life for his care. But she is a wonderful woman and would have made a wonderful mother. I think she should have eloped and left that selfish man.

thank you all for your help, i just sent her a lengthy email about how i feel, and with an emphasis on maybe taking things slower and being friends for a bit so that maybe her father can get more used to me, im still afraid that might not be a possability because of her fear of her father though... but i guess all i can do now is wait, shes been kinda avoiding me i think on msn lately... so the email was the next best thing i guess... ty for the help again guys and hopefully i can reply with positive results in the near future

i have said it before and i will say it again, simply:whip it out

You're a bit young for this but you could always go and talk to the dad. Tell him what happened, tell him it was your first kiss, it just sort of happened, and you're fine with it not happening again, but you'd really like to continue to see his daughter and perhaps it would be cool if the two of you just weren't left alone anymore. At the very least he'll have a lot of respect for you. Takes big balls to be a man.;-)

well its been a while but just to update everyone ive failed miserably, i have barely talked to her since, just now i was, just talking like friends, but she said "night" and logged off of msn...anyways shes pretty sure about the whole dad thing not being able to work and doesnt seem to want to pursue this as much as me? idk i think that sounds harsh, maybe im being overemotional, i dont like the thought of her not wanting to be in a relationship as much as i do... in the end, we are much more separated than i would have ever wished, and im still sad about the whole thing, she doesnt seem to want to talk to me much... id be happy just being friends but in our current state it doesnt seem plausible... i really dont know what else to say, i wish i had a liscened psychiatrist right now cus i cant stop thinking about her even though i have no chance, everything reminds me of her, according to my sociology teacher (we just started the mate selection/relationship chapter of the course) i guess id call this infatuation, or is it still lust? the theory is that you feel lust for someone, then infatuation, then love, im afraid to call what i feel love i guess, just cus it would hurt too much to love someone who doesnt show the same feelings back...i went to concerts, and a car show since valentines, and looking for someone else just doesnt seem all that possible, i see other attractive people, but cant really see the possibility of persuing anything with them.... i really am just confused right now, upset... alot of that kinda stuff, feel like crying which was just induced by talking to her for the first time in a while just a few mins ago... the whole talking to her dad thing wouldnt work because she plainly told me not to, and i feel if she doesnt want me to do it it would be wrong to go and do it anyways... i dont know how i can expect help any more, i guess maybe talking about it should help, completely forgetting it all is hard and would probably require continuous substance abuse which im not really into considering atm... so thats the end for me, dont know what else i could say about it all... thanks for trying...