There was a young girl from Wick
Who asked her mum, "What's a dick?"
She said "Dear Annie,
it goes up your fanny,
and jumps up and down 'til it's sick!".
Hehe, I remember learning loads when I was at school. Anyone know anymore?
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An Amusing Limerick...
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Not a sexual one, but always one of my fav's:There once was a lady from NigerWho's pet was a great bengal tigerThey came back from a rideWith the lady insideAnd a smile on the face of the tiger
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On the internet they found romance,
That put both in a hot sexual trance,
But each had a gripe,
About having to type,
With a hand stuck down into their pants.In convertibles she was quite brash,
When she put her feet up on the dash.
As a trucker drove by,
Her bare crotch caught his eye,
And four people were killed in the crash. -
There's a skeeter on my Peter,Knock it off! Knock it off!What a pesky skeeter,Biting at my Peter!Knock it off! Knock it off!There's a dozen on my cousin,Knock 'em off! Knock 'em off!Listen to 'em buzzin'Buggin' Peter's cousin!Knock 'em off! Knock 'em off!Has always been my Favorite! LOL
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This is so old it's become a cleche of a dirty limeric. The funny thing is I've met lots of people who don't actually know how it goes or even didn't think the was any more to it othe than the famous opening line "There once was a man from Nantucket". So, for the record, here is the version I learned as a kid (there are probably other variations)please excuse the language, it's purely for historical accuracy.There once was a man from NantucketWho's cock was so long he could suck itHe said with a grinAs he wiped off his chin"If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it"here's a clean one that I wrote when I was a kiddoInto the air the Baron flewIn Snoopy's heart, the anger grewThe Baron attacked from higherbut Snoopy opened fireAnd tore the poor nazi in two.You'll naturally forgive the historical inaccuracy of a 7yr old
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Haha, nice one guys. So you all have a slightly immature love for dirty limericks too eh? Awesome! Keep em coming!
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Typical lol. I don't have a dirty limmerick... no talent tears
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I love limericks and know literally hundreds off the top of my head. Here's a small titilating selection:In the garden of Eden lay AdamComplacently stroking his madamAnd loud was his mirthFor on all of the EarthThere were only 2 balls and he 'ad 'emThere was a young lady of KewWho filled her vagina with glueShe said with a grin"Well they pay to get in......Let 'em pay to get out of me too!"There was a young man of MadrasWhose balls were constructed of brassWhen they jangled togetherThey played 'Stormy weather'And lightning shot out of his arse.And now my favourite, even though it isn't at all dirty:There was a young man of NunheadWho awoke in his coffin of lead"It is cosy enough..."He replied in a huff"...but I wasn't aware I was dead!"
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Here's an old one:There was a young girl of DarjeelingWho danced with such exquisite feeling, Not a murmur was heard - Not a sound, not a word -But the fly buttons hitting the ceiling.
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lmfaoawsome, i love them all!!