• C

    Okay, Here is what's going on.
    I've been with my fiance for about 3 and 1/2 years now and am still very much in love.In these few years our sex life has been kind of "meh". There has been the occasion tie up, maybe 3 times max in the years we've been together, and the occasional anal sex, probably about 1
    or twice a year. We have also had sex outside once in a park at night, and we both enjoyed it very much and both of us climaxed, but like i said, it was only the once. My fiance is not really a prude when
    it comes to new things in the bedroom, but rather just doesn't feel as interested and as excited about new things as i do. Sure when we start to touch each other she becomes aroused and wants to have sex, but it's in the same bed every time, nothing ever changes. Although the sex is great, because, well it's sex, after it's over
    i'm always left with a feeling of "wow, that was the same as (input date). I've tried everything, from porn, to massage oils to toys and have even tried to get us to come up with 10 fantasies of our own and exchange them, needless to say, the latter
    never happened because she could not think of 10. I've tried mentioning EVERYTHING, either she doesn't get it, or just ignores my comments. She just hasn't ever really had the desire for sex or for new things as much as i have and lately it's been killing me, and i'll tell you why. We both know each others past, and although i agree that
    her past doesn't bother me at all, it does. She has had a 3some in the past and has had sex in various places other than the bedroom, and although my previous girlfriends were great lovers i was never quite as experienced as she is. I try not to let it bother me, because i know that she loves me and she didn't love them, and we plan on spending our lives together, but that is no excuse for a poor sex life, in my opinion. Today we were on a drive, and she missed a turn she was supposed to make, and i said "you should probably turn around" and she replied "oh dont worry about it" and she said it in a way which made me beleive she had something, sexual or not, to surprise me, but nope, she ended up just turning around, and what made it worse is that when all of this went down, all i could think of is my ex girlfriend
    and how we used to go for drives and she would just pull over and give me oral sex, and it's that spontinaety that i miss
    greatly. Now, to make the story take an even bigger turn, is that my fiance is now 7 weeks pregnant. I completely understand
    that worrying about the baby and the mother of my child should always come first, all i seem to worry about is, IS MY SITUATION
    ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE. My sex life has been meteocre at best in the last 3 years and i really can't see a baby helping
    matters, although i want a baby incredibly bad. I cannot help thinking that most women really enjoy sex, and like to
    try new things and experiment, and i dont know why my fiance isn't that way, god knows i've tried everything, and talked about everything from watching her pee to trying anal on me, it's not that i'm shy, i've said these things, but get nothing out of it. i'm at a loss right now because i've been noticing myself being cranky with just about everyone because this is all weighing on my mind, along with millions of other things.
    so here are a few questions of mine.
    1. Am i being selfish for thinking of this, at this particular time?
    2. is my sex life going to get worse?
    3. Will it get better at any time, or am i destined for future divorce?
    4. What can i do to help out with making her want something different?
    5. How can i bring this up in a way that wont cause a fight, because on many occasions it has, in which we ended up
    doing something different for one night, then back to the norm. Kind of like "shut me up sex"

    Please, anyone help me... i'm at the end of the rope.

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