Pap Smear (sort of) and Vaginal Pain

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Ok, you need to relax...ALOT. Pap smears are painful, but definitely not unbearable. I'm 31 and my first pap, I cried through the entire procedure and for about an hour after I left.

I think you're experience is so painful because you are too tense. Even if you think you're not, you're most likely tensing your muscles and making your vagina even tighter. I've only ever experienced the metal speculums, but I do know they make a slightly smaller size and they should always put lubrication on it. I suggest asking the doctor to use the smaller size. When your legs are in the stirrups, relax them way far out to the sides and just generally try to relax all of your girly muscles. The swab is the worst part, but it only lasts about a minute.

I hate to say it like this, but once you have sex, you kind of get used to things being shoved in your vagina. lol So it makes the pap a little more tolerable. :grin:

It's going to be even harder to relax now. I don't think I'll be able to go back to get one. I not one to take pain, like I would never be that still. I couldn't sit still through through the one I had. If felt like she hit something and that felt like a stab. I almost jumped off the table. If she has tried again. I definitely would have stopped her and got up to leave. I don't think I can do it again now. It really hurt and from what I've read it's not supposed to if done right. I don't know how to calm my nerves after that experience.They should be painless. I don't know how other women do it, especially if they've had painful ones. I'd probably die of something 'cause I'd never go back.I probably won't have had sex for the first time before I have a pap smear. The odds are pretty low on them both. I tend to avoid painful things, any amount of pain feels terrible; I don't have a very high tolerance/threshold. I may get used to having this shoved in my vagina after I have sex...maybe after several times or more, 'cause most likely I'll not feel used to that after the first time. The thing is that that pain memory has been burn into my mind, you don't understand. Ugh, that feeling was terrible, that pain sensation. I hope your pap smears were/are better than mine. The same is for sex, when it hurts the first time, the other times after are going to be even harder for me. I'll need coaching and I'll be really nervous, 'cause I'll be afraid of the pain and I'll remember that. I hope the guy I'm with better be really patient and understanding, because it's not going to be easy. Firt times at sex will not me memorable of fun. Like I said, I really not looking forward to it, even worse finding someone fitting to sleep with. I lost out on my last chance. Insensitive jerks are the masses and my psyche can only handle so much.

Get the book "When Sex Hurts" by Andrew Goldstein, MD, Caroline Pukall, PhD, and Irwin Goldstein, MD.You are not alone - a LOT of women experience this, and not a lot of OBGYNs get it (unless they have specific education in this area. The pain is real, don't listen when people say "just relax" as that doesn't always solve the problem. There are anatomical/medical reasons, and it's common (just no one ever talks about it or they try to ignore it or stop seeing the doctor). There is help. Get the book, you'll see.

I feel like she didn't do the exam properly, she went ahead even though she couldn't really see where the swab she was inserting was going. It's not a straight shot and a rigid cotton swab on a stick won't work. When I've tried to insert my finger or tampons i really have to be positioned right and aim in a certain direction. With my finger I can only get one in any more than that and they slide or I feel like I'm being stretched. Even if I am relaxed, things don't go in easily. When I have gotten fingered in the past. I could feel the stretching and that's it. It's wasn't pleasurable, it felt numb, like no sensation. I knew his finger was inside and they were moving, but it was like it was numb, I felt nothing. I only could climax/orgasm when he stimulated my clitoris.I think the big problem is doctors want to blame the patient when they are the ones doing something wrong. It doesn't matter that they went to school for years to be a doctor. People's bodies are not uniform, we're not made in a factory. We are not all the same.I'll have to find that book.

Wow, I am glad to see this topic! I never go to the gyno simply because it always feel like they are ripping me apart. I always thought I was the only one who has this problem. The doctors, both male and female, always act like it's my fault. So I just assumed that something was wrong with me and I just don't go. I have never even had sex and you don't even want to know how old I am!! The way things are going I may never find anyone.

I don't know why doctors have a hard time understanding that it can be painful for many women, especially if they've never had sex before. My vagina isn't used to having thing pushed in. I recently thought I had gotten a tampon stuck inside. The next time I go for an exam I am definitely going to explain to the doctor my past experience with pap smears and that I and NOT very wide down there so they better not shove and pry me open like I'm a cadaver instead of a live women that is sensitive to pain. How can doctors be so smart and stupid at the same time. I get frustrated every time I think about what I heard them do to their patient doing gynecological exams.

Blasphemy! LOL Just kidding. Ive read similar things on other blogs. Ill take your word for it. Stay solid! your pal.Hmm, that is some compelling information youve got going! Makes me scratch my head and think. Keep up the good writing!

@ tangledwebHave you thought about experimenting with a vibrator when you're really wet and horny? I mean somehow you gotta learn to insert stuff in there.

I know how to "insert stuff in there", it's just not simple. angle and size are important, so is the texture of the object. I've learned that inserting anything can be painful or frustrating if no one pays attention to those things.

Tried to get an exam again...failure. it kept hurting couldn't get it in. I immediately started to move around once I felt pain. As the speculum was inserted it felt like my skin was tearing, especially the part around the outside of the vagina near the anus. When I saw the two sizes both looked like an extra large and that there was no way they were going to get in, relaxed or other wise. Inserting tampon are difficult, and they're way smaller than those speculums, plus they don't have to open up like them either. When I remove my tampon, it literally feels like something is gripping on the tampons and keeping me from pulling it out. When my boyfriend has fingered me I know when he using more than one finger, 'cause I feel that tearing and I have to get him to stop.I'm supposed to go again this Friday. It's with a male doctor, (uggghhhhh), but I need answers badly. I really want to find out what is causing my itching an odd discharge and hopefully clear up whether or not I have genital herpes. I've also been looking into buying my own extra small one in case they say some nonsense about them not having a smaller size.