Need advice please - BI Sexual Urge

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First off condoms help against all STD's (Genital wise), so don't worry too much about that, just remember to use a condom reguardless who you have sex with.As for your feelings, they sound relatively strong. I am not saying you should break up with your GF BUT one this I will suggest to you, before you ever decide to get married experiment first. I know you said marriage is not something you are thinking about but I cannot tell you how many stories I have heard of guys who were curious before marriage never experimented and than years down the road after they have children fool around with guys and end up in a VERY messy divorce with kids right in the middle.I know not exactly a solution, but more of something for you to think about.

I think Ntroducing myself makes a very valid point. It sounds as though your urges to try this are very strong and not something you can just dismiss easily. Give it at try, see if it's as great as you fantasize it is. Just be prepared to lose your girlfriend if she were to find out. Regardless if it's a woman or another man, it's still cheating. At this point, it's only you that can decide which means more to you in this point of your life.

my advice is that everyone feels this way, i know i have, im a strait guy, and i have had the urge to hook up w. other guys. so i did, i tried it out. and now i know what i reallly like.

Wait it out. It may happen. I've wondered and once while watching porn with a guy would could get off so he fell asleep. Alittle latter I rubbed him awake and to blow on him so he could get off to(and I was curuious). He awoke and ripped down my shorts for and swallowed all I had for one of the best I've had. He'd done it since then and only done this with him. I really don't fell gay cause it was just friend giving help instead of watch each other jack off as before.

This is my first post, I’ve always been kind of a lurker, on this site, but your post really spoke to me. I know what your going through.I have always been attracted to guys, just with varying degrees of intensity. Sometimes, a guy is all I can think about other times they couldn’t be further from my desires. This may not make since to most people, but even though I fantasized about guys and had since I was about 13 of 14, I never realized that might mean that I was bi until I turned 28. Believe me latency is a bitch.I got married at 23 to women that I still love very much, at 29 I told her I was bi. That was not easy, for six months I was suicidal. The only thing that kept me sane was talking to my new gay friends on the net and a guy I had met, who is gay, locally. They offered more support than I can ever thank them for.After six months of agony, I finally told my wife that I was bi. She took it well at first saying she wasn’t surprised. But after a couple of days of thinking about it, I guess she had concluded, in her mind, that this meant that I was wanting to break up with her, to pursue my bi fantasies. Nothing could have been further from the truth, but try and explain that to a woman who is all of the sudden sleeping next to a stranger, that she thought she knew.It took three days of convincing that I had no intension of leaving her and that I was still the same person. It was three days that made my previous six suicidal months seem like a cake walk. In the end she finally did see me as the same person and our relationship is much, much stronger. Now we even bring my bi leanings to bed with us, talking dirty, bi porn and so on. I am truly fortunate.I tell you all this for two reasons. First, if you want to take a guy for test drive (or you want him to test drive you) do it now. DO IT, DO IT, DO IT!, if you do get married to the love of your life the chance to try it is over. SECONDLY, IT IS NOT HEALTHY, COMFORTABLE OR HONEST TO LIVE A LIE. IF AN ATTRACTION TO MEN IS A BIG PART OF YOUR SEXUALITY (which it sound like it is) TELL ANYONE BEFORE YOU MARRY HER. Don’t try to hide who you are from you spouse or potential spouse, believe me you won’t like it. If she is “the one” she will except you for who you are and not take it as a rejection of her. If she can’t except it than she is not excepting you and you are better off to let her go, as hard as that may be. Love from anyone should never, never, never be conditional.In closing let me give you a word of cation. Don’t expect, as a bi man, to be befriended by the straight community. They’ll just see you as a “fag”. Don’t expect, as a bi man, to be befriended by the gay community. They’ll see you as a “closet case.” I have no gay friends anymore, they all just sort of drifted away. I miss them. It was nice to talk about the new, hot, waiter the way I talk about the new, hot, waitress with my co-workers. I miss that. There is no bi community, that I have found anyway.I’m sorry for the length of this post. I am just hoping that burningthunder5 finds something in it that will help him.

Let me add one thing to my previous post. If your not thinking of a long term relationship with your current partner there is no point in telling them. Just be honest with yourself and the one you plan on binding your life to be it man or woman.

Great first post hon, welcome to the boards

Thanks AngleWitch, your my favorite, hun.

awwwwwww thanks honey............hugs

I have no problem with watching bi porn as long as a woman is involved. However, when it's only 2 guys, it's just not the same. I like those 3-somes with 2 guys and a girl. I'm just too wary of the risks of sexual behavior in general. I get offers from other men all the time and I turn them down. I don't feel bad about it either.

What a great first post, OldFolks!

Thanks, Ineligible

Wow! What a terrific first post! You gave such great advice and thanks so much for sharing your personal story! =-D

Thank you, NtroducingMyself. I guess in my years, I have made a lot of mistake and if anyone can avoid the same pitfalls by my sharring, then I feel somewhat duty bound. Thanks to all.

I feel you man. in your exact situation... but without a girlfriend. doesn't seem like any girls find me attractive -- is that maybe why i look at gay porn too? im so confused.. but my point is, i can relate to you too wellm/17

Wow, I 'm in the same situation with most of you guys. I don't consider myself bi yet, maybe I am, who knows. The fact is that I like girls, but I 'd definitely like to have sex with a guy, even once. I enjoy anal masturbation too.I really like the way you shared your experiences with us, OldFolks, and welcome! What a great post indeed. Most bi people are confused and I think you helped a lot with that post. It's still too bad to see that bi aren't accepted so easily, even by gay people.What can I say to burningthunder5 ? I guess you shouldn't talk to your family and friends about it, but if you want to continue your relationship with your gf and marry her, she has to know.If you want to experience sex with men, now is the best time, before moving on with your gf. Just keep it hush-hush (looks left and right). That way you can sort out your feelings....one more (irrelevant?) thing: I read somewhere that anal sex is more dangerous for stds, because the anus contains more bacterias than the vagina or penis, and it's more likely to get infected. I don't really support that opinion (even if it was written by a doctor) because if you use a condom, you are 98-99% safe. Just remember that oil based lubricants react with latex and can break condoms, so use water based lubricants like KY gelly if you go anal.

While I appreciate your sentiment about my post and thank you for your welcome that was my first post from October of 2005. I've been around long enough that I'm sure there are plenty who are far less welcoming of my presence.

Originally Posted By: LL88First off, i'm no expert but I think that it would be easier to catch a STD from having sex w/ a girl than a guy, because u arent sticking ur dick where stds are found. I think that dependng upon wat kind of person ur g/f is, she would probably dump u if u cheated on here or maybe even told here about ur problem. I would just wait it out or go have sex w/ a guy if it is bugging u oral sex can spread some stds, and anal sex has the highest chance of getting aids.