Whats with this woman ??

---

Here's a tidbit from my journal. it's about a woman I met online and she came to visit. I just don't know what the hell it was about. Perhaps someone could offer some answers:

Trish has been bugging the shit out of me to let her spend a weekend with me. The other night she's talking dirty on line, showing me her tits on web cam.
I ended up inviting her over for the weekend.
Rather pretty, nice body. Nice personality but intensely neurotic.
"I want to have sex with you"
"But it would be wrong"
"I'm so horny"
"But I must be strong"
"I'm so hot for you"
"But I'd feel bad in the morning."
Just insane. It was the bulk of her conversation while here. Introspective and moody, feeling so down with herself that she had this turmoil going in her.
We did smooch on the couch and sleep together though ( no sex).
Today she decided that she must catch a bus home because she was so horny for me if she stayed tonight she would end up having sex with me and feel bad tomorrow.
I was happy to get rid of her.
We made out on the couch while waiting for bus time. Things got very hot, she whipped out my cock and started stroking me.
We ended up in bed watching each other masturbate, that's as close to sex as she would go.Even though she was jerking me on the couch, once we got naked in bed she wouldn't touch me or even let me kiss her.She said if we kissed she would end up fucking me and she would feel bad about herself if we did.

I know it would be easy to write her off as a cock tease, but why travel 3 hours to meet me just for that?

You forgot the tidbit!

there it is LOL, I was editing it and messed up

It's showing up now, that's odd. What was the problem for her? Did she have a partner she'd have been cheating on or something? She must have given you some idea why?

She might have wanted more than a one night stand thing, or she might just be wierd...........LOL

SF, she was a born again Christian ( apparently one that didnt mind talking dirty and showing her tits on cam hmmm).
The odd thing is that I am a "no pressure" guy, I told here from the start that there was no pressure for sex if she came to visit, I just really liked her personal ad and enjoyed chatting with her and wanted to meet her. So she had no reason for this conflict within herself, it wasnt like I was bugging her for sex.

maybe she thought the actual act of having sex would be wrong, and that all the other stuff kinda wasn't..........and knew if she stayed she would end up having sex with you and that would be wrong..........sorry to butt in but hey its what i do LOL

Don't be sorry, thats why I posted, I wanted to get peoples thoughts and opinions. I agree she had a strong sex drive but also morals, serious conflict. But what bugged me is that she didnt have to have the conflict, I kept telling her " it's ok, we can just have a nice no sex weekend together", I liked her. And you have NO idea how frustrating it was to be laying there naked together, each of us wacking off, watching each other but no touching, damn !! I hope she gets this sorted out, if she tries this with some other guy with less self restrainght she's gonna end up getting raped or beat up.

It sounds like she was torn between wanting to have sex and the guilt pressure that religion can put on a person regarding their sexual expression. It definatly sounds like there is some high-level confusion going on there, if she has one hand on a bible and the other on her bra clasp. The problem is hers, not yours. I'd take that as a lesson if I were you; if sex before marraige is important to you - steer clear of the bible bashers, ha ha!

who said anythng about marriage ?? yikes, been there done that. We're talkin sex after marriage here LOL

And you have NO idea how frustrating it was to be laying there naked together, each of us wacking off, watching each other but no touching, damn !! yes i do

Have you heard from her since she went home?

By the time I took her to the bus station I was happy to get rid of her, she was so seriously freaked out I was expecting her to have some sort of meltdown or something. Afterwards I sent her mail expressing my concern and disappointment that our weekend plans had gone astray so badly. I commented that perhaps she dindt find me attractive and that i would have been happy to just be friends if that was the case. She she sent me back a letter telling me she had discussed the situation with her son ( he's about 30) and they had decided that she would continue to see me and see where it goes,BUT she then went on to berate me becasue of my insecurities ( ie: that I had mentioned she maybe didnt find me attractive) and yadda yadda... it was not a nice letter. So I just never replied to it, havent heard from her since.

Probably better leaving it at that so. I think I'd give anybody who needed to consult on the matter with their child (age irrespective) a wide birth. It just shows, you never know who you're meeting over the internet.Tell me a bit more about the whole camming thing? What's that fucking buzz about? It's not something I could imagine doing to be honest. The idea of taking my clothes off infront of some stranger from God-knows-where, uurrrgh!That's not to say other people arent entitled to get their kicks any way they like as long as it involves consenting adults etc etc. One thing I'd feel bad about in that situation would be the person I'd be messing around with might be married or have a partner who loves them and would be devestated if they knew what was going on. I wouldnt like to risk being responsible for causing hurt in anyone elses relationship, even if it was some woman on the other side of the world I'd be never likely to meet.

the camming thing?guess its different for everyone in terms of how and why and with who. I dont just whip it out and start wackin for anyone LOL. Myself, if I "know" someone on line ( or in real life) and the conversation gets hot and the opportunity to meet isnt there, then doing it on cam together is a fun alternative. I guess it seems tacky and cheap, I guess it is, but I cant deny its is fun and a turn on, hard to explain why but I like that we are getting each other turned on, i like her watching me cum, its the ultimate in safe sex, we get our rocks off. It's probably more of a turn on for guys as men seem more visual than women, and it definately isn't romantic, i guess its the cyber equivelent to a stress relieving, passionate quicky.I can't explain the turn on of having a woman watch me shoot, maybe I'm twisted, but there's just something about it thats really hot for me. And knowing she is watchin and getting off on it... male ego? who knows... but its cool.Do you still respect me? LOLThe woman I describe above and I were discussing sex online as part of our chatting, things got hot, she started giving me peeks on her cam, flashing me, so i flashed her. It kinda sucks doing that for someone you are planning to meet and prolly have sex with, kills the mystery.

Yeah, I still respect you, ha ha, each to their own. Is it not possible for it to be in any way romantic though? Or is it maybe that you just havent had that experience yet? I suppose in any form of human sexual interaction there has to be the possibility of romance in there somewhere?

What about partners of these people? Would you ever ask them first if they were married/involved? If my boyfriend was to do something like that I'd view it every bit as badly as physically active cheating, for sure.

I agree Star, if I had a partner who was secretly camming with some dude I would be really upset. Like " if yer horny why not come to me??" Like I said, i only cam with people I know in real life or have become freinds with online, people that also have a cam. That way theres no solo performances for kids or homos. I expect that I will get flack for being a double standard hypocrite, but if some married lady wants to play on cam with me, fine. We both would have fun and get our rocks off and I wouldn't feel I was contributing to a marriage breakdown, mearly entertaining and giving pleasure to some bored housewife. We all have our own degrees of what is acceptable and what isn't. I don't think I would define a married person camming as "cheating" but I think it would definately indicate some sexual issues with the relationship that need to be resolved, assuming it is done secretly without the partners knowledge. There's one lady I used to cam with and her hubby knew and sometimes participated. Different strokes for different folks I guess.

as for romance, well I guess that is sadly lacking in cam fun, hard to cuddle and kiss on cam. its all about desire and passion. Nice to know 2 people who like each other can have fun and give each other the visual pleasure at least.

maybe shes a religious nympho.

He participated? Jesus! What do you mean by that? Maybe I'm a bit more naive than I think I am, ha ha. Does that mean you had his cock in your screen as well as her, ehm, bits?! How did you get on with that? No stagefright? Ha ha!I dont agree, by the way, that in camming with somebodys wife behind the husbands back you wouldnt be contributing to a marraige breakdown. I think definatly you would, weather or not the husband was to find out, cause being part of a sexual secret she was keeping from her husband would make you partically responsible for an emotional distance between them, that in all liklihood would cause problems in the marraige. If he did find out it could result in divorce, it fucking would if it was my marraige! But I'm not trying to hold myself up as any sort of paradigm of virtue either, dont get me wrong; I've cheated in past relationships and caused much hurt