Hello All., This is gonna be long...I'm a 19 year old male , I just made a huge move across canada to Edmonton Alberta for work and my girlfriend of 2 years had been posted (father in the military).I got my own apartment here in and just recently my girlfriend had moved in with me , now its just getting to repetitive, we wake up , we go to work, we come home we watch tv, eat and sleepWe dont really have much friends and our lives are feeling like they are going no where, she is really bummed out and I am aswell..We are finanacialy well right now , I am a first year apprentice mechanic, although Im making the choice to go on the oil rigs to make 90 thousand a year and she is going to move back home, I will be gone 2 weeks and back one week..I feel I am very established for 19 , having a place, bills, car, all paid for no debt and I have tried several career paths but I am still deciding but I keep quitting jobs, I just cant find anything I like, So my last bet is the oil rigs for 3-5 years to save up killer money and get into what ive always liked, real estate investing.. If this fails I have swore I will move back to Ontario..As far as everything goes its just all to much to handel, I dont have anything to look forward to, like in highschool, weekends, parties etc. now its nothing, Any suggestions? Help? haha.. I feel I am getting antisocial , things are getting worse..
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Way to over my head at 19
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You point out an important issue. At school the makings of social lives are laid on, but it can be different outside it. Of course there are work colleagues, but most workplaces aren't as social as school or college.
For some people church and the people there help fill the gap, but that's not for everyone, and that's why people form clubs and groups and go in for sports or volunteer work. The temptation to do nothing and get into a rut is strong, especially when you're a couple, but you should try to resist it and actively go out and get involved in things.
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Ineligible makes a very good point... as always it seems. :smile:
You need to go out and do something that you feel is constructive. Perhaps you can join a church, club, or other type of organization like Ineligible suggested. Maybe get on MySpace and start chatting up some people that's in the local area. Or perhaps you can start pursuing an interest like martial arts or join a gym. Doing all of these things you are making yourself available to people and they're available to you. It's only a matter of time that you'll start to make friends.
There is a saying that goes, "Home is where you hang your hat."
I happen to think that home is where your friends and/or family are.
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You're best off getting involved in an activity where you interact with people. I'm not so sure about a gym, unless you're into bodybuilding or weight lifting, but it all depends on how outgoing you are, and how willing you are to engage people. Things like sports clubs are great, as are political activities. Religious activities are probably great too, if that's your thing. Courses are also great, especially if you can study with other people; but even if it's something casual, it indicates a common interest.I don't know if it applies to where you live, but Craigslist.org has activity listings that might be useful. In any case, it's best to get out and do things, rather than sitting around your house when you have spare time.
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I think what your describing is modern life for most people. The only remedy is to stay active and engaged. I have railed, on these boards, before about how people seem to fold up and die the minute their out of school or past twenty-five. It sounds like you've gotten there a little faster.Take classes together.Take dance lessons together.Travel together. Bike together.Just get out and do shit, cause, as much as I hate to say it, it's only going to get worse. A lot of people seem to think death sets in a twenty-six and from there on it just a matter of saving up enough money to get into a good nursing home.
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Cool, another Edmontonian on the A2A boards. Hope you're enjoying the city. I don't really have any experience with what you're going through, since I'm only 16, and trying to find a career that interests me. The only advice I can give you is, when choosing a career, make sure that it will make you happy. There's no point in having a job that you're going to hate for years.
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I love craigslist!iv found alot of activities adn activity partners there. No not the NSA casual encounters parts, but the actual community parts and the activities parts listed onteh front page. Free shit, cheap shit trade shit, rants and raves. God bless craigs list.Iv even gotten involved in a few things I never would of thought to have because of the volunteers section.