I made a thread a few weeks ago, and basically we all came up with my problem: I don't have confidence.At first, I didnt accept that. I thought I actually did have confidence. Then after thinking for a week or two I finally realized that I indeed, had no confidence.But why? Why don't I even have the confidence to be rejected by a girl? It's because... i'm ugly.Hideous, fat, unattractive, eye sore, behemoth, enormous, ugly.Really, all throughout my teen years my family says I look great etc, i'm not ugly. But to people not related to me, who are actually blunt and dont care how it makes me feel, say that I am unattractive, fat, and ugly. Ever since 5th grade till now, entering college. Even my good friend said the best i ever will get is a "6". I doubt that, infact I doubt I can even get a girlfriend with the way I look now.After 7 years I have finally accepted the fact that I am ugly. I don't deserve a girlfriend with the way I look now. No lady should have to deal with me in my current form.I have stopped looking for a girlfriend. I have stopped "checking" girls out. I have stopped masturbating for about a week now. Whats the point of checking girls out and masturbating, when there's the real thing out there? Granted I haven't had any of that yet, it seems like im living in my own world when I check our girls I will never get, or masturbate.So I have stopped all of this. If the most beautiful girl asked me out tomorrow, i'd say no. I hate the way I look. I dont deserve a girlfriend looking like this. So I've stopped.However...I am doing something about it. I have never been depressed before, and don't plan to. Instead of crying on my bed, looking for excuses like everyone else, turn things around and use it for motivation.I've been going to the gym, everyday, for about 2 hours a session, for almost a month now. I've lost 10 pounds. I burn 1200 calories each night on the elliptical (Helmsman, is this enough to lose weight efficiently?), and actually have a good diet now.I use to care about my looks and how my first impression was, how I walked etc. But now, I really dont give a shit, atleast not for now. I will actually care about my looks when i'm not an ugly monster, which should take about 6 months.Six months. Six months of pain and suffering. A good enough trade off if you ask me. I havent wached tv since may, havent drank soda since june.I wont let myself be fat any longer. I wish there was an overnight pill, but it seems the hard way is the only effective way.So to everyone who makes fun of fat/ugly/less fortunate people, this is just for you. True I am doing this for myself mostly, I am doing this to prove you assholes wrong too. You've ruined my life, up until now. I won't let you make fun of me. I will be better than you, one day.I am at war with you people. I am also at war with myself. Oh, who do i mean by "you people"? I am talking about the media, pop culture, tv shows this day that say you have to have a hot body, perfect tan, perfect teeth, and lots of money to be wanted in society. Screw it all.So this is the end of my rant post. Any suggestions are welcomed, please be blunt, Don't try to make me feel better, I can atleast recognize that I am ugly, but damnit instead of posting an emo thread about how my life sucks, I am actually going to do something about it.It's 7:12 pm now and need to get ready for the gym. Talk to you all later, hope you enjoyed my thread.
I found out why I am so pathetic
Why don't I even have the confidence to be rejected by a girl? It's because... i'm ugly.
Being "ugly" does not equal being pathetic.
Oh, who do i mean by "you people"? I am talking about the media, pop culture, tv shows this day that say you have to have a hot body, perfect tan, perfect teeth, and lots of money to be wanted in society. Screw it all.
I find it odd that you know this, but you still let it get to you. And now, you have this mentality where you believe if you're ugly, you're worthless. Sweetie, that's not true and you have to believe that.
I'm glad you're planning on losing weight, but I wish it would be on better reasons, like being healthy, instead of vanity (at least, that's it seems to me. Sorry if I'm wrong). You can work out and look like an underwear model, but if you don't change your attitude, it's not going to do anything.
Please at least know that there are people who don't give a crap on how you look. You can be heavy and still have someone who will like you (and even love you) for who you are. My boyfriend is on the heavy side, but I find him to be the sexiest thing in the world. And I would love him no less if he were to gain or lose weight.
Either way though, I wish you best of luck on your goal to lose weight. :smile:
I'm glad you're doing something and going to the gym. I can't help feeling that you are in fact depressed, but gym work is a good thing to do to help.
Stop thinking negative.There's a part of the brain at the back of the brain which sorts out important information from unimportant information. Every second of every day we recieve tons of information, we'd over load our brain if we absorbed it all at once, so this part only lets us see what we need, or want to see. For example:Your in a noisy, crowded room with lots people talking, you can barely hear the person you're having a conversation with in front of you. Yet if someone on the other side of the room mentions your name you zero in on it instantly.You buy a new car, and all of a sudden it seems like every second person is driving the same car, you see it everywhere. This is because you're aware of it and thinking about it.Now, if you keep thinking how pathetic you are, you will notice every tiny detail which makes you feel pathetic. Your brain too will then block out "unimportant" information that will make you feel less pathetic. Self talk helps. You are good looking. You are funny. You are intelligent. You are a catch. Keep telling yourself these things, all the time, everyday, and you will soon come to believe them, because they are true, you're just not seeing it.
I pray everyday that my future wont be this:http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3710987618964917848It just sucks how I have to suffer so much when there are many people who can eat whatever and howmuch they want and not gain an ounce... this sucks.
Dude looks are not that important as I'm finding out. It's all aboot personality. Glad you're going to the gym, I need to start that myself. I need to get determined to change like you are. But you gotta work from within man.
I can feel your frustration. I'm not going to sugar coat this like some other people.
Your looks ARE getting in the way of you meeting women.
If you are really as fat/disgusting as you say, then there is not much of a chance you'll end up with a decent women. You are doing the right thing by going to the gym. Btw, may i ask how much you weight right now and ur height?
What i don't agree with you, is only waiting until you have a good body to get chicks. This is not the right mind set. You will ALWAYS find reasons for you to not try to meet girls. But what you should do, is do both at the same time. This way, once you loose the fat you want, you'll already be good at getting girls already.
You need to change your attitude. You will NOT succeed if you have a negative attitude all the time. This i learn from personal experience.
Cutting calories and working out will help you loose weight, but often it is not the SOURCE of the problem.
Heres what i recommend you do:
-Every day drink a full glass of DISTILLED water immediately after you wake up
-Get a colon and candida cleanse (and others cleanses will help too). they can be found at your local health store
-Get a mini trampoline; this sounds silly, but jumping for 10-20 min. on it everyday is one of the best ways to balance your body and loose weight.
-Always make breakfast your largest meal
-DON'T EAT ANYTHING AFTER 6PM
-NO ARTIFICIAL SWEETENERS (that means diet soda(which is actually more fattening than regular soda))
-NO WHITE FLOUR
-eat an apple (best if organic) everyday or as often as you can
-try to gain muscle as you work out, because more muscle=more fat burning.
-the last thing is wearing magnetic finger rings while you sleep. i've never tried this myself, but i've heard some people see amazing results.
Wow, me and you are a lot a like on this I started my get fit campaign about the first of the year for about the same reasons. I noticed that there was a lot of fun stuff that I wanted to do but didn't trust myself physically to do it. When I noticed that I was like, I am not going to let my weight keep me from enjoying my prime and making stories. So I quit pigging out when I ate, started building muscle, and about 3-4 months ago started riding my bike for about 10 miles a day everyday. I have lost a lot of weight from it, but still got some gut to lose. I started at about 210 and am now 175. Another reason was the fact that I know I would like to find a good looking girl and why should I expect her to keep in good condition if I myself am to lazy to do the same.All I can say is keep it up and I'm with ya.
Just watched a bit of the Guys and Dolls thing, if thats not incentive to sort yourself out, what is. I think a lot of people want to sort themselves out if they feel the need and i commend you for being proactive which can be a hard thing to do. Im not gonna tell u ur being silly by thinking as you do because someone saying 'stop it' or 'dont be silly' or whatever doesent help coz the mind is a bastard you just have to bite the bullet and tell urself u are the man.
Day 32, lost 12 lbs and no one has seemed to notice anything yet. Girls still feel akward when they talk to me, always finding an excuse to end the conversation. Are all the girls already taken, did I miss the bus, or am I just that bad looking?I dont get it.
Dude, you have to work on the INSIDE. Everyone pointed out that you need to work on your self-esteem issues. Like I said in my other post, you can look like a hot underwear model, but if you don't have any confidence in yourself, girls will walk away.And a small piece I wanna add: No all girls are attractive to guys who are simply hot. Personality is key.And congrats on lossing the weight.
Firstly 12Ibs is a great acheivement and you should be proud of ur acheivement, if it makes you feel better then its good stuff.Just because uve lost a few pounds though doesent instantly make you cassonova. If you can focus on what makes you a great guy and work with that you'll be laughin'. Accentuate ur positives, ignore the negatives.Remember that NOONE is too good for you. YOU ARE THE MAN!KNOW IT. LIVE IT.