Well I do have good news in that I am past the year mark with the gf despite cheating (kissed another girl) and breaking up with her and getting back together. Now the thoughts of moving in together and going beyond are starting to pop up... I am not so secure in thinking that with this girl, I do love her and she is wonderful but I am not sure. My family and close friends are feeding me their feelings and all come back with the same feeling of she is just not it. They all tell me I can meet someone better looking, more independent, and more intelligent. To their credit I do agree on some of these items and I can see that I am not "myself" around her all the time. There are times when a simple kiss is a sure way to piss me off and spark my impatience.I want to find that balance in my life and while I am in school and working now I have less patience and I am more stressed than normal. I spend time, that I do have when I am alone which is less and less now, trying to soul search where I want to go and be in life. I really need some help on figuring how I can do this. I am really getting more and more lost as time goes on.
Reaching that point in the relationship...
Well guess what.. your friends and family arent the one who would be spending forever. You need to picture the two of you together.. Is that the future? Is that the person you could see yourself growing old with?
I do get flashes of that for sure, but I also get extremely scared. Also my sex drive has died and I am, well used to be, a real horn dog. I loved sex it was great, but its just gone now... Intimacy is very difficult with her
Hey Walken, I think the fact that you are here posting this thread shows your uncertainty. When you are with a partner, you want to be sure that you want to be with them everyday and everynight, and can see this as a happy future for all the days on this earth.
I was talking to my brother last night and he said "You know by the end of the first month of being together, if you can't say 'yes' to spending your life with each other, then it's an automatic 'no.'"
While he may not be 100% right, I think the principle applies to your situation, as you've known each other for 1 year. You should know now.
How would you respond if you found out that she was thinking the same thing "I think I can find someone more attractive and is a better partner, maybe Walken isn't the one for me." I'd be very unhappy, and so would she. You should be sure, and proud of your partner.
The problem is if you are moderately content, comfortable and in a routine of being together, it can be hard to change. It takes courage and guts, but it is well worth it in the end, -I know from experience.
Hey, good to see you, cool!
Hey manYeah had no internet for a while. Just been re-addressing my life... which was primarily relationship centred