Fall time again

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its fall time. again. most people hate the cold, but i love it. i like sitting outside and doing nothing and being numbed. is that weird? i think its great. as the end of this first quarter approaches, i once again, am melancholy.my theme song seems to be like "fade to black" by metallica. i dont really have any worthwhile things to put into life anymore. it seems i am always tired and sluggish. unwilling to cooperate with anyone. the homecoming dance is this weekend. i have a date. i love the shit out of this girl...but she lives 60 miles away. and i dont see her often. this will be the first time in 6 months that i will see her. I hope it will live up to my expectations, but like most things in my life it will most likely fail to measure up. my problem is that right sfter she goes to the dance with me, she will go back home. and i wont see her for a long time again. and she already has a guy lined up. like she told me that she will go out with this guy the day after she goes with me. for the record this girl loves me too. but i cant do anything to stop her because she lives too far away.she lives to far and, i dont have a car. so im going to feel like an idiot when all my friends notice that shes already in a relationship the day after she goes with me. it seems like a matter of little importance, but i have no chance to kiss her or anything. because she is always out with a new guy. its not like she sleeps around, the farthest shes gone is make out but i feel powerless to stop her bc i have no good reason to. i feel lonely all the time. and distant from her, both literally and figuratively.by the way. any guy whose girlfriend said they werent gonna have sex until marriage, and then did, how did you do it? im wondering not because im looking for a one night stand but because i love her and she says shes never gonna do anything.thanksphilosiphyman

Hi philosiphyman, do you feel more melancholy at this time each year? If so, it could be seasonal affective disorder (SAD), caused by less light, especially if you're in a high latitude. That can be treated effectively with bright lights.You seem to be setting yourself up for failure, and when you expect failure it often happens, when it need not happen. Relationships need to be worked at to be maintained, and if you see a girl only every six months she will (quite reasonably) think she doesn't mean much to you, unless you are talking to her often on the phone and doing all you can to make up for the distance problem.Actually sixty miles is not so far and even if there is no bus you could probably get there more often.You have to get the relationship right first before there is any chance of sex. Even then, you still have to respect her wishes.

thanks ineligible, shes the one who made me think that its gonna be awesome. and that we are going to have a super fun time. so i feel much better. ill just go with the flow and hope for the best!

That's a good attitude! :smile:

everything was great and infinitly better then i could have hoped. so i dont even know why i need to say this but now im pretty sure i am in love with her. shes the perfect fit. great with my parents, and even with my friends. she lives 60 miles away but she gets her licence in a month so we will see what happens.thanksphilosiphyman