So I'm worried I've got a psychological condition thanks to being raised in a strict Mormon family. When I was 14 or so my mom found my "stash" of lingerie mags and I got in huge trouble. My mother is one of those people who cannot tolerate anything even remotely sexual, in any situation, and my dad isn't much better. My parents and "church leaders" kept asking me very grimly if I "touched myself" -- I obviously lied and said no since it was such a big "sin." Religion has done nothing but harm in my life. I'm now 29 and a decided Atheist. I firmly believe that masturbation is normal and healthy. But it's like I was emotionally traumatized by that incident. Since then I've been afraid to touch my penis directly, so I always masturbate with my cotton boxers -- without lube. It wasn't a problem for a long time, but it seems that I'm becoming more and more desensitized so I have to masturbate longer, and now I keep getting chafed. No bleeding yet but it gets really dry and sore. I used to do it 2-3 times a day but now I have to wait a day or two because it aches.I keep telling myself that I need to get some lube and just do it with my hand, but I keep going back to my old habits. I don't like the "mess" of the lube or my semen, so that doesn't help.Anyone have advice or help in this situation? It's embarrassing as hell, but it really concerns me.
Can't Do It Properly
Welcome to the forums OneInBillions!Getting chafed from masturbation is definitely not comfortable. If you don't like the mess, maybe you can try in the shower.However, the biggest underlying issue seems to be that traumatizing experience in your childhood. Have you asked yourself why you're afraid?