Recently, I've had someone I feel I'm in love gain feelings for me. We could have had something start, but something inside me caused me to "push him away" in a sense. I declined starting a relationship with him, yet I've loved the guy for over a year. He claims to still have feelings for me, but he has appeared to move on (obviously). He recently has broken up with his first girlfriend since the ordeal with me, and hints out he has strong feelings for me that never did fade. That his girlfriend was nothing compared to the connection with me. During this period of "dating" (I wouldn't really consider it that, just continuous days of spending alot of alone time together) there was awkwardness and nervousness on my part because of self esteem issues, and that caused him to become nervous aswell. When I contemplate about possibly starting something again with him, I still feel as if I know I will disallow it again. Yet, I regretted it last time when I did this. This may appear to be an afraid-to-commit case, but I know that isn't the problem. Is there any reason that comes to mind as to why I may be pushing away what I love? Or do you think it extends to pyschological grounds perhaps I need to discover?
Is there any way to explain this?
I've never felt that before, Perhaps you love him in a different way? Perhaps it could be the fact that you love him, but as a mate. Or it could possibly be that you love him too much to lose him altogether? And it's stopping you from going out with him..
In reply to:Or it could possibly be that you love him too much to lose him altogether? And it's stopping you from going out with him.. That seems quite reasonable. I do know that my feelings for him have always been too intense and almost unhealthy in a way. Maybe that can be a factor as to why I'm doing this?