i am 13 years old. i am depressed for what seems to be no reason. if i think abut it my life is good but i am still depressed. i was at a really bad school for 3 years where i was beaten almost every day. i might have been beaten a lot wores if i dint have a friend who is really big. i had thoughts of suicide and i cried thru class. now i go to a better school now but i am almost failing only getting low 50 in all subject. i some time scratch my skin till it is red and raw or beet my self with a metal poll. i all so bite my self. my gf left me a few days a go for no reason. The rest of my life is good. I am kinda a pyro and setting fires is the only way to bring me out of my Depression. can some one plz help me.
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This is my firs post
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how long ago was this experience at this school? it sounds terrible--definitely not something that can be forgotten and especially more difficult to handle without support. there is definitely a reason for this depression you're in. doesn't anyone around you see this? this is unacceptable! what kind of people ignore this?! doesn't anyone around you see you need someone? i don't know what to say, but don't deny the severity of this. i don't know...what can i say to help?
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It's not always the case where other people can tell. It isn't always obvious on the outside what's going on on the inside.
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Hey welcome to the boards First I don't think you are depressed for no reason, for a start your age.....I woudlnt' go back to being a teenager for all the money in the world.............well ok maybe.....Being beaten, being in a bad school etc, all will drag you down...and its hard sometimes to feel good again.....I have suffered from depression, but I have never self harmed and really don't understand it, so on that point I cannot comment Your feelings won't change overnight, and tho you may feel your failing at school now, relax and give yourself time to get over what you have been through
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it was over a year ago and now i go to a better school but most of the ppl in my new school think that i am on drugs and i am not. i have some frends there.
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You are very welcome here, N, L,. It will take a long time to get your self-confidence back fully, but you will get better at it. Year by year you will have more skills and more friends.
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The way you say that people think you're on drugs, but you're not, sounds like me when I was 14. I was so stressed, and I'd stay up extremely late every night and had such horrible social anxiety that when people talked to me in class (the only people who talked to me in the classes I had where, for the most part, the people who harassed me, and I hated every minute of those classes) I'd be slow to respond and didn't know what to say to alot of stuff they said. I had HORRIBLE social skills at that point (although this forced me to get better in the following year), and I was getting alot of reddish eyes due to my severe lack of sleep, and a bad case of pink eye which I had for about a month towards the end of the school year.As far as getting beaten goes, I'm very sorry to hear that. I wasn't ever beaten up, but other things happened to me. Constantly had stuff thrown at me, poked with things like pencils or even worse with whatever the sport we were doing in phys ed involved. I hated phys ed since it was the class full of assholes, and I was the "fun" person to piss off - being poked in the back or worse the ass constantly during every phys ed class with field hockey sticks, baseball bats, tennis racquets really screws with you when you try not to "overreact" out of fear of being called a spaz, which I often was. What really drove me crazy was the fact that I had so much built up rage and wanted to beat them up (although I was clumsy and not the best at alot of sports, I was bigger and a bit stronger than alot of the other guys) and get revenge, but that would just be the source of more insults and I'd have to face getting suspended or possibly expelled if I took it too far. There's a video on newgrounds that I really related to, and it made me think strongly about the negative repurcussions of any actions I may have wanted to take - it's called "No Remorse".I was depressed part of the way into the following year, but it got better due to a much better social environment (one reason I was extremely glad for the transition into high school). Right now I feel depressed, in a different way, and I don't know why. I guess this is sort of the way you feel from what you're saying. Find a way of dealing with it in a positive way or at least something that won't hurt yourself or others. Right now, I spend alot of time reflecting on the way things used to bem listening to music, reading forums that give me insight on other people's problems, and think about the kind of person I want to be. I may waste alot of time, but the way I look at it it's far better than self inflicted injury.