First time posting on this board, lots of good info on here though and it's helped me a lot, but i couldn't find anything in particular that applied to what's going on with my girlfriend and i. First off, we are both virgins, personal beliefs etc play into that. Anyway, whenever i'm with her and we are having our fun, i do my best to make her feel as good as possible. I spend a lot of time with foreplay, kissing her neck, ears, breasts. Touching the inside of her leg, ass, getting extremely close to her pussy then backing off. I do this for probably about 20-30 min, i really have no concept of time though while i'm doing this. Personally, i love foreplay, watching her and hearing her getting so aroused and turned on is pretty cool. Anway, we haven't gone past fingering and hand jobs yet, and i've only fingered her maybe 5-6 times or something like that. Whenever i start down there, she's wet, so i know she's ready for it. I have learned in this short time that fast isn't always good, and slow is usually better. I know where the clit is but whenever i try and stimulate her down there she doesn't seem to be enjoying it. She won't stop me, but compared to how she reacts when i say, lick her nipples, it's kind of dissapointing. I've gone inside her before and ocasionally hit a spot that she seems to react a LITTLE bit better to. I know where the G-spot is and everything, but she just doesn't ever react that strongly to anything. BTW, she hasn't had very much experience and she never masturbates, and never has had an orgasm. May sound weird, but i really want to give her her first, but it's frustrating when everything that is supposed to be working isn't working. Any and all advice is appreciated, thanks.
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Getting Frustrated with Fingering
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I've said this before and I'll say it again.. communication. Ask Her while your fingering and find out what she likes. Don't go by sounds, simple as her. You can still be sexy when asking like "How does this feel, baby" or "You like that?" Communication is SOO important.Another thing I noticed form your post is you said she has never had an orgasm before. How can you expect to satisfy her if she cannot satisfy herself? Basically what I am trying to say is she needs to explore her own body so she knows what feels good and can direct you in giving her an orgasm.Hope that helps =-)
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i'm in a very very very similar situation, the only difference is:neither of us is sure if she's gotten an orgasm or not...i've gotten to a point where she's breathing really heavy/practically moaning and moving her hips and everything and she seems really close and into it then she'll stop and just lay there and be like "um.. i felt pretty good for a few seconds.. and now i'm not really horny anymore".. i've done this through exclusive vaginal stimulation, exclusive clitoral stimulation, both.. blah blah.. i'm just wondering if that's the orgasm?!? She's only smiled twice after it happens, generally she just looks kinda confused/uncomfortable and we're both like "um.. was that it?" I can't think of any other reason she would just suddenly stop being horny... yeah.. it's just sort of anti-climactic and i'd like to make it a lot better for her -_- so, knowing this you decide whether to accept my advice or not:even if it seems like she isn't enjoying it, just be persistent (as long as you're not hurting/making her uncomfortable) and just sort of get into a rhythm (slow at first, maybe speed up later) and rub around the clit, maybe brushing up against it everyonce and a while and sometimes press a little harder or go a little faster - adjust the rhythm/theway you're rubbing based on her reactions but don't change too much at once, just keep it up and you'll hit something right and she'll start getting into it too...
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Sounds to me like she might be subconsciously turning it off. Whether it's because she feels embarassed by it, or something else, it's tough to say.
It could also be that she just doesn't get very strong orgasms. Just remember, practice makes perfect. As long as the process is enjoyable for both of you, there's nothing wrong with continuing to try.
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There are three types of female "orgasmic charts" for lack of a better description. Some women have one orgasm, some have one and if they are continually stimulated may have another, and some women are incapable of having an orgasm.
I'm not sure where to find this on the web, but one of my professor's lectured on that subject for a day. -
She may be too sensitive to enjoy direct clitoral stimulation. I'd say just go down on her, if you know where the clit is, tease her a little until she's yearning for some more then go down. You'll love it, and if you do it right so will she.
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what can you feel when she feels good as you put it? if you feel her vagina tightening around your fingers she probally orgasmed